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Are you more or less happy after having children?

110 replies

Jac1978 · 20/12/2012 21:06

Honest answers please!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
FamiliesShareGerms · 20/12/2012 21:12

Different happy!

Bluestocking · 20/12/2012 21:14

More happy.

vix206 · 20/12/2012 21:14

Definitely happier. But also more tired and less self focused. You have to let a lot of 'me' stuff go, at least while they are small. But without a doubt, happier Grin

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ValiumQueen · 20/12/2012 21:16

Much much happier, but also incredibly tired and lots to worry about including how desperately sad I would be if anything happened to one of my kids. DC3 is only 8 weeks and not well so the tiredness is not a constant. Oh and much less money, but money does not compare to the joy of little arms outstretched saying I wuv oo mummy, accompanies by a wet snotty kiss with a faint aroma of piss.

ginmakesitallok · 20/12/2012 21:16

My children have given me some of the happiest moments of my life - they've also caused the most worry, made me tired and grumpy at times and given me grey hairs. But the happy times are worth it. (Then again, I didn't have children solely to make me happier - that would never have worked!)

hazeyjane · 20/12/2012 21:18

The happiness I have is a more intense happy than anything else I have experienced, but the so is the anxiety (and exhaustion).

jinglebellyalltheway · 20/12/2012 21:19

More content in a way,
but never since having kids have I felt that pure carefree happiness, where you're just in the moment and blissed out - there's always the worry, about now and about the future and about the world your kids will live in etc

icovetthee · 20/12/2012 21:20

I'm very happy but I do have more to worry about. On one hand my children are the best thing that has ever happened to me. On the other I am anxious about their health and well being, I have less money, less time and less sleep.

If I could do it all over would I do it the same way? 100% Grin

QTPie · 20/12/2012 21:21

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

Dromedary · 20/12/2012 21:21

Huge amount of fear, worry and guilt. The responsibility is too great, especially if you get something wrong which has long term implications.
A lot of frustration, not being able to do what you would like to be doing, etc.
Very hard work.
Very expensive.
Not a good time to bring children into the world.
Others have already described the upsides.

scotlass · 20/12/2012 21:25

Definitely more happy. Agree about never having the carefree blissful feeling and always having the worry about the here and now and my DCs future. DH and I definitely have less time for each other but probably appreciate each other more now.
Simple things make me really happy now and I love seeing my children grow and blossom into their own characters.

Fishandjam · 20/12/2012 21:29

Different happy, definitely - a kind of deep, intense joy. Generally when the little buggers are asleep.

IPreferCats · 20/12/2012 21:30

Less happy.

I think in the long term it will change but right now definitely less happy than I was before.

What about you OP?

FergusSingsTheBlues · 20/12/2012 21:31

Despite all the good times and the joy probably Less. Sorry. I havent slept properly in two years and this is probably the biggest factor. Second due in feb. Think it has brought out the worst in me.

Fishandjam · 20/12/2012 21:32

PS QTPie, I managed to slalom DC2 into the world a couple of months before I hit 39, with DC1 2.5 years earlier. And I know plenty of 40+ who've done it too. So you have time yet...

brainonastick · 20/12/2012 21:34

Both

More happy when I'm with them

Less happy in the rest of my life - restrictions on my life/loss of freedom (stuck in hated job, can't go on decent holiday, very little quality time with dh, knackered, unfit, little time for hobbies or pottering).

Wow, that's a long list of negatives (and I could go on). But the one positive (spending time with the dc) outweighs all that.

brainonastick · 20/12/2012 21:36

Well, I think it does anyway Smile

Tigresswoods · 20/12/2012 21:36

Complete & happy

Gilberte · 20/12/2012 21:42

On a good day, I feel very happy and proud. On a bad day much less happy.

I'm a person who cries a lot but I think I cry more now.
I am much more neurotic now.

Wallison · 20/12/2012 21:42

Definitely happier. More so than I would have imagined. I also even get that 'blissed-out in the moment' happiness talked about upthread, which I haven't had since, well, since I was a child myself I suppose. It doesn't happen all the time, because I am a worrier by nature and now my worries are two-fold and more urgent. But every now and again, when we're mucking around doing stuff or being daft together, it will come, just because I get so caught up in his happiness and he makes me forget myself.

Without wanting to sound too precious/flowery/ick, when that happens it kind of humbles me that he can make the world seem so wonderful.

TheCountessOlenska · 20/12/2012 21:44

Happier. Having children filled in a missing piece for me, I feel complete. (and obviously knackered, worried, stressed, trapped etc etc Grin )

NagooHoHoHo · 20/12/2012 21:45

more happy.

But I did see a pretty boy wearing a 'lets go somewhere and make bad decisions' t-shirt, and I really missed those bad old days. I'd love to be a bit less responsible.

MrsChristmasBungle · 20/12/2012 21:46

I am a different sort of happy too.

Pretty much as brainonastick said to be honest.

I am happy with my family life, love my kids more than anything in the whole world but I do miss being young and free too!

Yama · 20/12/2012 21:47

More. 1000 times more. (Was lonely before.)

CommanderShepard · 20/12/2012 21:47

More. So much more.

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