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On becoming Mary Poppins... Toddler and newborn support thread #2

882 replies

ThePinkNinja · 08/11/2012 09:38

A place to continue the complaining conversation about the hair pulling days and sleepless nights fun and frolics of life with a toddler and newborn

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
debbie1412 · 22/01/2013 17:10

Crazy I'm with you on that, I'm struggling already this wk it's only Tuesday lol. Looking forward to spring so we can atleast go the park in the afternoon. I was meant to start my diet this wk but in my depressed state I've eaten loads junk. I really want chocolate but lily doesn't cope well with it. It's not helping with my mood :-(

crazypaving · 22/01/2013 17:48

Debbie yes please spring now please!!! winter with a toddler SUCKS!!

crazypaving · 24/01/2013 09:08

ds1's last molars are sprouting! he's much less narky now, thank goodness! kind of feel a bit teary at the thought that teething is now over for him. a relief but the end of babyhood officially!

now to await ds2's first...

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AngelDog · 25/01/2013 19:29

Aaaargh. Aaargh. Aaaargh.

DS1 is playing up and DS2 is having more allergic reactions through my milk so I can't eat any of the things I want to. :(

DH is away for the weekend and parents/PIL are visiting, but that means DS1 gets even less of my attention and plays up even more.

Hello everyone, glad you're all still surviving. :)

Still hoping to get my evenings back at nearly 15 weeks - but now DS2 is big enough to go on my back in the sling, so that's progress. :)

debbie, I've not yet started on DS1 self-settling (age 3y1m) so I expect it'll be a while yet with DS2. Wink

Loopyhasanotherbean · 25/01/2013 20:14

Re getting evenings back, we have ours now :) ds2 was 20 weeks on Wednesday, and has gradually brought his bedtime forward by himself, and he was asleep in his crib by 7.10 tonight :)

crazypaving · 25/01/2013 20:17

We got our evenings back whilst away on holiday, at 15 weeks. The downside is he's now waking anywhere between 3am and 5am. I think I preferred sleeping later to having "evenings" - speaking of which, I'm off to bed Sad

MadMonkeys · 25/01/2013 22:02

We got our evenings back when dd2 was about 14 weeks I think... Its all a bit hazy though, I can't be too sure exactly when it happened! The teething seems to have settled down again, dd2 is feeding normally again, hurray!

eversomuch · 26/01/2013 11:07

We had one evening this week when both kids were asleep by 7.30. That was the night after it took DS until 10pm to settle (and I started at 6.30). Now he's back to going down around 8ish and DD is fussing about bedtime and waking up once or twice during the night and/or starting her day around 6. I think it's her teeth bothering her -- the last few are coming in, although no sign yet of last molars, so good times still to come! O_o

DS turned 12wks yesterday -- spent most of the day attached to me on a feeding frenzy. Planning to try introducing a bottle this week. I really need to reclaim a bit of independence and if DH could give him a bottle at the weekends, I could get out of the house for a bit. Will see how it goes. So far, he's refused a dummy, so no idea if he'll take a bottle.

AngelDog · 26/01/2013 23:23

Envy DS is 14 weeks tomorrow and spent most of the evening unhappy today.

OTOH I've yet to notice any growth spurts yet - one benefit of constant chaos. Grin

Oh dear, DS1 wailing - better dash.

Birdies · 27/01/2013 16:05

Hi everyone. The main problem I have is DD1 is 18 months but not walking so needs lifting everywhere. And DD2 (4 weeks) only wants to sleep on me. So getting DD1 down for her nap is really stressful - I never taught her to self settle so it can take half an hour to get her to sleep. And I'm not comfortable leaving baby to cry on her own downstairs all that time. So far i'm lucky in that my mum's been helping but I'm gonna have to manage on my own at some point!

Does anyone else have that problem? Where on earth do I start in getting DD1 to learn to self settle?!

mattysmum09 · 27/01/2013 19:18

I don't know birdies but I'll be awaiting the answer!lol....

crazypaving · 27/01/2013 20:12

Anyone got any tips for an early riser? DS2 won't settle after feeding at 4am. He then needs a nap by about 6am when we all start getting up for the day. Help!

debbie1412 · 27/01/2013 22:15

Hello ladies on self settling ds was about 5 months. With him I would go bk in put him to the breast to soothe him then bk in his cot with mobile on. I would just wear him down. As he got bigger and doing more he would be more exhausted so I gradually got my evenings back as he was going down earlier. Dd 12 wks she's having to (a) do all naps in her bed because ds 2yrs is so noisy she can't nap down here. I've also started encouraging self settling. When I know she's tired I just return comfort and leave 10 days in its starting to pay off. We got 11 hours straight last night. I'm in no way expecting it constantly. We are all so obsessed with them sleeping through but teething is right around the corner so it's all going to go tits up again anyway.
Where I keep going wrong is I sometimes think she's not that tired and try to keep her going longer. When really I should jump on those 1st signs of tiredness and act on it there and then. I annoy myself because if she's over tired it takes double the time but sometimes it feels like she's still feeding and sleeping all day long.
How is everyone ??

debbie1412 · 27/01/2013 22:18

Crazy I would go back to not having evenings and her sleeping through the early morning hours. I function a lot better if I'm sleeping when the house sleeps. Your evenings will come soon enough it's early days x

wibblyjelly · 28/01/2013 00:21

DS is 4 months, and just won't settle tonight! He's asleep on me at the moment, so will attempt operation put him in his cot shortly. He has also decided that he will only take a bottle from me at the moment....

debbie1412 · 28/01/2013 07:18

Him, sorry x

greenfolder · 28/01/2013 09:00

what i did, back in the day was stick to routine with dd1 (2.5) and dd2 just came along- slept in the car/buggy/car seat. when dd1 finally went to playgroup, dd2 would fall asleep in the pram on the way home, i would park her in the garage so as not to wake her up and would sit on the sofa and stare into space for 2 hours!

i also remember feeding dd2 standing up in the kitchen cos dd1 would create merry hell if i sat down and fed her- moved this to sticking her in front of a video with a bowl of chocolate buttons whilst i went upstairs.

neither of them have been emotionally scarred and i think that most kids cant remember much before 3 as a defence mechanism!

Bumpsadaisie · 28/01/2013 10:10

Just wanted to add moral support by showing you how it gets easier.

DD is 3.7 now and DS nearly 15 months. He is walking, and can feed himself. At last I can sit them both down with their plates and drinks and (sort of) let them get on with it while I tidy the kitchen (so I don't have to do that once they are in bed).

They have a bath together and need only light supervision. I can get things ready in DS's next door bedroom while keeping an ear out and popping in every two minutes.

Our bedtime routine is now easy - DS has his story and bottle and goes straight to sleep while DD reads in her room upstairs. Then I read her a story.

DD is getting on for four and is very independent now. She will go off and play in her room while DS has a nap, which means I get a nice chunk of time on my own to mess about/do jobs. She has also come out of the toddler phase. While she can sometimes be moany if tired, generally she is much more rational and amenable to reasoning with. When DS was a newborn you just couldn't reason with 2.5 year old DD, she was just a big balloon of (strong) emotions, ha ha!

Of course DS is walking and climbing everything so that part is harder than when he just sat like a podge in his bouncy chair and gurgled. And of course there are the sibling arguments!

But generally it is much more fun now, sometimes we have a real laugh at the breakfast table with them being silly with each other.

Now, should I have a third, or not?! (Noooooo!)

Onwards and upwards everyone x

dilys4trevor · 28/01/2013 15:08

Hi ladies,

To also add light-at-the-end-of-the-tunnel support....

I struggled with a just-turned-2 and a newborn for most of the first year of being a mum of two (ML second time round was alot more stressful than the first).

But just wanted to say that now they are 4 and 2 (although there are still difficult days), they play together like nobody's business, meaning on my days off (from work) I can get on with surprising amounts of housework. They love the same stuff (helps they are both boys) and the younger one is much more outgoing and has done wonders for the elder one's shyness. Plus, the younger one being a fab eater is helping the elder one try more things.
Younger DS is talking and counting and understanding loads better than DS1 at the same age.....because he hears it all from his brother and wants to impress him.
Nursery tell me they embrace about 15 times a day and that when one is ill, they bring the other one in to cheer him up.
So lovely.
Hard yards in year one (of having two kids) but MUCH better in year 3.
Now I'm desperate for a third!

crazypaving · 28/01/2013 15:43

thank you all for stopping by with some light at the end of the tunnel! crawling towards it with gritted teeth...! really it does sound like it can be lovely, which was the reason for having the second in the first place.

economymode · 28/01/2013 20:29

I'll be joining you soon - my son is almost 21 months and baby two is due tomorrow, eek!

I'm terrified...

Mylittlepuds · 28/01/2013 21:11

Oh God still absolutely shitting myself about this scenario. DS1 is 21 months DC2 is due in ten weeks...the tactic I'm currently employing is to pretend it's not happening.

debbie1412 · 28/01/2013 22:27

Crazy we can do 52 wks we'l all do it together x

debbie1412 · 28/01/2013 22:27

Hell I'm 12 in already x

Benang · 29/01/2013 00:08

Can I join, please? DD is 2.7, DS is 8 weeks. In the last month, we've all had chickenpox: me first, then the baby, then DD. Which means we've been housebound for weeks. Massive CBeebies overload. Someone wailing all the time (and it's not always me!). No sleep (the toddler waking up and yelling whenever the newborn does...). Nonstop stress with my husband. Etc etc.

On the plus side, DD is super nice to DS.

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