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Original poster

'SAHMS' that have full time childcare or help - a fantastic liberation or downright lazy?

906 replies

Enid · 21/02/2006 09:51

There are lots of mothers down here in Dorset who are (or whose husbands are) well off enough to afford NOT to work. I know a few and they all have full time aupairs or nannies. One of them has TWO nannies - one for each of her children.

It seems to be a matter of pride that you always take the nanny/au pair on holiday to help with your children. Also that the nanny/au pair takes the children to clubs and activities.

OK - I think it is outrageously lazy (and so does dh). What do you think?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
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nailpolish · 22/02/2006 09:59

lol enid

Issymum · 22/02/2006 10:00

Hell! That was far too serious a point. Must get back to punting around a few emails.

pouchofdouglas · 22/02/2006 10:00

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nailpolish · 22/02/2006 10:01

expat, you around? was going to suggest a trip to Fifth Floor in Edinburgh but the cakes there are stale

we could be much better off making our own

iota · 22/02/2006 10:01

I'm not clinically depressed - just old and slowing down

Enif · 22/02/2006 10:02

lol

like that quote about getting old

when you bend down to do up your shoelaces you think if there is anything else you could do while you are down there.

nailpolish · 22/02/2006 10:03

and you make that loud groan as you stand upright again

muma3 · 22/02/2006 10:06

Mama3 it seems I don't have your permission to work full time (you said part time is ok)? Glad you can afford to SAH (and by that I mean pay the utility bills, food shopping and clothes for your children). btw I work but my arse is getting a wee bit fat (no time to go to the gym .

expectingsummerihope-
we can all have our opinion can we not? i believe being a mother is a job and to stay at home with them imo is the right thing to do . we all make our own choices though and tbh im not saying that it makes you a bad person i just think the children need us around fulltime until they are a least 5 . but yet again thats just what i think just as you believe what you are doing is right too

iota · 22/02/2006 10:06

I think one of my knees cracke the other day when I stood up

MissChief · 22/02/2006 10:06

should have gone private, I only know Larkin's "they f*ck you up" by heart!
espresso machine at playgroup - brilliant idea..

expectingsummerihope · 22/02/2006 10:07

Been making that loud groan since in my twenties and now ds is doing it too!

ggglimpopo · 22/02/2006 10:08

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PrincessPeaHead · 22/02/2006 10:08

Has this kicked off yet?

...PPH swans off with a martini in hand (mixed by the full-time cocktail waiter) to play tennis with the full-time personal tennis coach whilst simultaneously ignoring the pitiful wails of her baby in the assumption that the full-time maternity nurse will do whatever needs to be done with her...*

ggglimpopo · 22/02/2006 10:08

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pouchofdouglas · 22/02/2006 10:08

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Enif · 22/02/2006 10:09

god

is it martini o'clock already?

expatinscotland · 22/02/2006 10:10

yes, np, but they have to be from scratch! no mixes. that's cheating and you could lose your merit badge for that.

nothing beats the view from the top of harvey nick's, tho! and i know b/c they sell Goldfish crackers and other American yummies there. at least, that's my excuse for going in there.

ggglimpopo · 22/02/2006 10:10

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Anchovy · 22/02/2006 10:10

I think I like Milge's summary best, which I've added to:

  • 2 nannies for 2 children and a mother who doesn't work outside the home, is lazy. There are probably only a handful of these people that exist anyway.

  • One nanny for 2 children plus, and a SAHM is one very lucky lady, although not everyone's cup of tea.

  • A nanny/aupair for 2 children plus, especially when they are older and may attend different schools in diametrically opposite directions makes life so much easier and often is more of a necessity than a luxury.

  • WOH and having a nanny is a whole different thread.

  • Having parents and relatives around to give spontaneous occasional free care is a huge advantage, but doesn't give you the moral highground to comment on other people's choices - it just makes you lucky.

  • WOH gives rise to fat bottoms but may also engender the ability to afford the odd lunch at Harvey Nicks.

PrincessPeaHead · 22/02/2006 10:11

actually I'm feeling rather inadequate that, despite the nanny, my highlights are in a dreadful state, I haven't had a manicure for years, I have horrible horny feet AND I can't play tennis to save my life.

by all accounts I should be fragrant and lovely and slim and fit. Sigh. failed again

expectingsummerihope · 22/02/2006 10:11

mama3 yes of course you are entitled to your opinion. My ideal choice would be having him in part time childcare (which he already has) while I work part time too. But just to clarify, my current situation is not choice - it's necessity.

pouchofdouglas · 22/02/2006 10:11

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Enif · 22/02/2006 10:12

now that is lazy pph

book appts TODAY

expatinscotland · 22/02/2006 10:12

HORNY feet completely unacceptable! What next, hairy lady gardens and no shampoo?!

iota · 22/02/2006 10:12

PPH - -SAHM with a nanny and not a well-groomed yummy mummy?

Now thats what I call lazy

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