How much do you 'ignore' your children?

[Gameboy]

Have just been out with two families - friends of ours- who have kids about the same age, and I have to confess, I am amzed by the extent to which they actively 'ignore' their children trhoughout the whole afternoon.

By this I mean they seem to 'zone out' from all the various requests/ questions/ constant 'to-ing and fro-ing' that seems typical of under- 6s??

As a result they actively seem to enjoy themselves more, manage to have 'adult' conversations (which I gave up years ago )and it seems that their kids eventually give up and go and sort out themselves whatever it is they want....( which seems like a good thing I suppose)

I can't decide whether I'm just a mug with my kids and let them dominate my life too much... but I simply CAN'T ignore them - it seems really rude and uncaring somehow??

thank you marthamoo

spidermama, I wasn't saying that what the african lady was doing was right if indeed she does teach her child that white children stink, just that vaunda said the lady's justification was that that was how she was brought up. Vaunda's justification for bringing up her son the way that she does is also because of the way that she was brought up.

Racism in any form is wrong, as is bullying. Trust me, it's not a fact that I ever let go of.

so the Prince bullied your ds because he's white and white kids smell? and no other reason? obviously bullying is completely wrong and there is no way i would condone it. What was your ds's reaction to the Prince's bullying?

In honour of sw "has this thing kicked off yet?"

Oh I get what you mean now Marthamoo, didnt read your last post properly

Agree magnolia. I genuinely don't understand why some people seem to view vaunda as fair game for a dig. I agree that her handling of the bully's mum wasn't award winning, but we're all prone to emotional reactions under such duress surely?

oh hello Marsie! did you have fun salsa-ing last night?

Vaunda, what did she smell of? And also, your nephews mother is a whore? So she sleeps around? If you truly do accept others, then maybe she just needs a little help with parenting, or she might be depressed.

Wow, Vaunda your life!

You spent 5 nights a week in restaurants with your ds and your friends discuss fashion with him

MY FRIENDS DISCUSS WHAEVER HE WANTS TO DISCUSS. THAT WAS AN EXAMPLE OF WHAT HE LIKES TO TALK ABOUT.

You have a 40 yr old friend for whom your ds is the number one party guest

HE WANTS HIM TO BE THERE, WHAT IS THE PROBLEM

Your father was killed by a nurse in hospital

YES HE WAS, SHE ADMINISTERD HIS DRUGS, DIDN'T SIGN THE CHART TO SAY SHE HAD AND THEN ANOTHER NURSE GAVE IT AS WELL, WHEN THEY REALISED THE FOLLOWING MORNING THEY TRIED TO FLUSH IT THROUGH HIS SYSTEM AND FLOODED HIS LUNGS.

Your son's teachers all saw his scan pictures and think he should be treated differently from all the other children in his school

NO THEY DON'T SEE HOW MY MUM CAN BE SO HARD ON HIM. YES THEY DID SEE HIS SCAN PICTURES BECAUSE MY MUM WORKS THERE AND HAS DONE FOR 23 YRS.

Your autistic nephew's mother is a whore

MY ATTITUDE TOWARDS ANYONE WHO WILL COME INTO AN AREA AFTER BEING AWAY FOR 4 YRS AND TAKE UP WITH A BLOKE TO THE EXTENT THAT A DAY LATER SHE LEFT HER SON WITH ME ( I HAD NEVER MET THIS BOY BEFORE) FOR 13 HOURS AS SHE WAS TOO BUSY IN BED WITH THIS MAN. AND IT IS MY COUSIN NOT NEPHEW.

Your son held up a chest of drawers with a 24 inch tv on it

ACTUALLY THE TV WAS ON THE FLOOR THE CHEST OF DRAWERS WAS WHAT HE HELD OFF HIM.

You should write fiction, you really should.

WHY BECAUSE YOU ARE UNABLE TO READ THINGS WITHOUT TWISTING THEM?

Ooooooops I meant marslady

FFS i must learn to actually READ these threads

(now i've properly hijacked the thread... sorry)

jampots, ds told the teacher, the head and myself. he doesn't fight. he hates violence, he saw enough as a small child.

Best way to ignore children is to put your headphones on and turn the music up. Works for me.

Vaunda, Don't let some peoples comments get to you too much. We have all read what you have said and although you have had a lot go on in your life does not mean you should be ripped apart by others

This is shaping up to be a Mumsnet Classic Thread.

Popcorn, anyone?

Nah, prefer m&m's and Minstrels

pawss the coke and b&j ice cream please.

pmsl!!!!! Just saw bj but didn't look at the & in between

thanks, Lou. not a bad idea!

Steffee, she smelt of bad b.o.

as for my cousins mum, she is in my eyes a whore, if you read the posting i placed a few minutes ago yo will see why. as for being in need of help what more could i have done other than give her and her son a roof over their heads, buy his bed and other things he needed. help her arrange the necc asse4sments for him, place him into school etc. she was not even able to cook for him so i spent time teaching her how to cook a simple meal. she would rather spend in mcdonalds every night of the week.

Yes to the popcorn. Ooh, if it goes on a bit there'll be more ignoring of children this afternoon

Magnolia,
maybe the fact that i am always honest with my ds is wrong, maybe because he is such great company aroun adults is wrong. But sadly circumstances made things this way. I can't change what is already moulded

OK I started cagtching up and the n got to the bit about the autistic nephew ..... PLEASE tell me Vauda isn;t saying that the child is autistic because he hasn't been to the park, or am I about to get crosser (I very rarely go to the park with autistic ds1 as he can;t cope with them unless very empty- and then usually the attention lasts about 5 minutes- but the autism came first, not the lack of park visting- went daily when he was small).

WWW,
I won't be here to continue anything I am off to the family prom in hyde park

Jimjiams, yes you are reading wrong. I am saying luke had never seen the inside of a park not that that is why he is autistic. I know that is not the case. I did also state that his mother had no idea until i broached the subject with her.

Is it just me or is this all getting a bit Twilight Zone?