Your dh/dp

[linzoid]

How many hours a week and how much housework/childcare does your dp/dh do? Mine seems to always think he has done more than enough and of course much more than other men who work 60 hours a week! Seems like he is doing less and less to me!
before i tell you how much he does i'll wait for some of you lot to speak up just in case i have to quietly exit and forever be called a slave driver!

Hmmm.
I feel the need for a little holiday. Wifeswap, anyone?!

I'm a very lazy sahm (but about to start working from home and picking up some youthwork in evenings).
dh does most of the cooking and all the washing up. I do washing and ironing and other cleaning but life is too too short to have a spotless house. When people come round, I clean the rooms they'll see, the others have their doors shut. Shopping is split between the two of us. dh gives ds his bath. weekends - dh does all the nappies if we're out - likes to feel he's a new man or something.

Well I work full time and DH doesn't I still do the lions share. I do all the cooking, loading dishwasher and washing. He may empty the dishwasher, take the rubbish out, but that's about it. If pestered he will do some cleaning, but what gets me is that he then needs a huge pat on the back, after I have put the hoover away, stuffed the dusters back and emptyed the bin he didn't see!!

Childcare however I have no problem with he does as much as me, and happily

Stripymouse and demented, think i am with the same man as you two! He sure gets around!

Aha that's what's wrong with him, three women on the go!

mmm - intrigued by what your dh might wash in the sitting room.

I work a full 40hr week, and DP's work varies hugely. He's self-employed and takes a fair bit of time off to loll around. When he's working though, he probably does a 40 hour week, and does nothing around the house at all.

6 mornings a week, I'm responsible for getting up with DS, breakfasting, dressing etc. I lie in on Sunday.

When he's not working he does most of the cleaning, tidying etc during the week - I'd say maybe 65% of the housework.

I handle all finances, organisation, laundry, shopping, cooking all the time.

At weekends he visits his children from previous relationship on Saturdays, so I handle all childcare, and on Sundays we do things 'en famille'.

Frankly, he doesn't pull his weight, but he could be worse.

DP (wageslave) gets dd up every morning and brings her down to breakfast which I (SAH) prepare. DP gives her her milk then goes off to work. I spend the day with dd and all that involves, apart from 2 days a week when she goes to nursery - I take her there and pick her up. My jobs also include shopping, cooking (although dp barbeques and fries eggs), laundry (dp does some ironing - although often it's all left until mil visits), tidying up, dishwasher, look after finances/car services/dry cleaning etc etc. We have a cleaner for 1.5 hours a week (the shame of it). I change all pooey nappies, DP often does wet ones (mornings, evenings and weekends). I get up in the night for dd while the wageslave sleeps on - only fair. It seems to work for us, although I'd love a few nights sleeping through and lying in. Only 20-odd years to go, I guess.

I work 5 days a week, out the house 8.20-5.40. DH works from home 5 days a week, about 9-4.30 and 2 or 3 hours evenings 7 days a week.

DD goes to nursery 8.30-5, 3 days a week, each of us does the child care 2 days a week. DH does the nursery run (about 40 minutes there and back each time).

DH does bath time, I do bed time. The one who isn't looking after dd during the day gets her up in the morning while the other gets another half hour in bed.

DH does the washing up, the hoovering, the general tidying. I do the cooking, clean the bathroom (not often enough), change the beds. DH does the shopping, although I write the list and tend to stock up in my lunch break. I do all the finances including DH's business. I buy dd's clothes. Dh looks after the cat, including feeding and litter tray.

DH is the calming influence and keeps us all sane.

My dh is out from 7.30 to 4.30 while I work from home 4 days a week. I do the mornings, so get ds up, breakfasted and dressed and take him to his childminder from 10 till 4. On my day off I have ds all day and we tend to go out / see friends etc - never housework! We all try to eat together, and normally I will cook while ds and dh play or go shopping. Dh does the bath and bed bit while I tidy up, and then we have the evenings when we both think we should be doing something in the house, but never quite manage it!
At the weekends we both do a bit of housework, me probably more than dh (60 / 40), but dh will cook. It works well for us, but will be put to the test when number 2 arrives.

I guess I'm one of the lucky ones...

My dh works 8.45 - 4.45 5 days a week, he takes the older kids to school (I collect them), he cooks our evening meal and is a whizz with the Dyson ! He also wakes youngest for her last nappy change and bottle at 11.00pm Sun-Thurs (I do the weekends).

I'd say it was 50:50 (some of you may remember me getting upset at the Mumsnet questionnaire, as it didn't allow that option)

Dh gets ds up every week day morning and brings through to our room, where ds has his bottle of milk. He then prepares breakfast and gets ds dressed while I slug in bed for as long as possible.

As dh is currently working part time/exploring option since accepting a package last November, he tends to pick up ds in the evening - although if he's not available, I'll leave work promptly to get ds.

He then looks after ds while I prepare supper. We take it in turns to put him down.

At weekends, I get ds up in the mornings and change his (extremely grotty, as it's later!) nappy.

Dh thinks he's the clean and tidy one, but doesn't notice that I've changed my habits over the last couple of years. He does the hoovering and all the filing, while I do the washing and ironing. He loves to cook, but because we've got a grotty small kitchen at the moment, we've had to stop cooking together. I tend to mop the floor and do the dusting (10 minutes each a week - Flylady routines), although he will also mop the floor if it's looking particularly grubby or we've got people coming around.

He tidies and hoover on a Wednesday, while I am out at my Pilates class.

So overall, I don't think I can complain!

Plus he's just had 12 long stemmed, red velvet roses sent to office because today is our 5th anniverary! AND he's bought me a big decorative wooden vase (5 = wood) - and this was after we spent a fortune on a couple of paintings two weeks ago, and agreed that they would be our aniversary presents to each other, so I didn't get him anything! Fortunately, I DID get him a card!

I was just thinking about this last night...we're quite close to 50:50, perhaps it's nearer 60:40 in truth.

We work together (yikes), both full time so routine is up at 7am with the baby, leave house 8.15 to get to nursery then work for 8.30. Person doing baby care leaves work at 5 to pick up baby and does play/feeding/bath/bed/minding for the evening while the other goes out to play. Usually that means also tidying up, putting washing on, cleaning anything too unspeakably filthy (it has to be pretty unspeakable for us to bother though).

DH looks after DS Tuesdays (am and pm so I get a lie in), Thursdays (am/pm) and Saturday night/Sunday morning (for prolonged weekend lie in) and I look after him the rest of the time, although for large chunks of the weekend we'll do stuff all together.

We try to do a general clean for the whole house on the weekend (one of us will do kitchen and downstairs, the other the bathroom and upstairs) but it's a small house and neither of us are massively worried by a bit of dirt so it never takes too long.

I take my hat off to his mother/naval training college, between them they have taught him to a) notice things need cleaning, b) do something about it c) realise it's not the end of the world if there isn't time

Only downside about the whole arrangement is that I use my 'nights off' to go to gym, go out, etc while he tends to stay at work. Am considering getting a babysitter once a week to make us go out together and remember to talk to each other.

before children we worked same amount of hours and IMO I would say it was 45 him 55 me. Gradually with the arrival of children and him working same hours I do 24 hour child care all the time, I would now say it's 5% him 95% me with no mistake but I feel I nag about so many things I can't raise this to the list as well!

My dp works around 50 hours a week. I work at my first job from 8am-1pm 5 days a week and then start my second job (SAHM) from 1pm-7.3opm.My dp does the kids bath every night and I do everything else including all the DIY, the garden, etc.

joben, surely your dp does something else, go on, wrack your brains, go on, go on please
Does he buy the family lottery ticket/ iron his shirts/ uncork the wine?

Well said, Joben, re your second job.

DH works 35 hours a week over 4 days and 1 extra day for overtime.
I'm a SAHM so work 24 hours a day 7 days a week

Love being at home though.

OK linzoid - how much does yours do? - will you be called a slave driver? You've been awfully quiet since starting this thread!!

Dh works form home and has a lie-in every single day. Sometimes I get really p*ssed off with it. I am up at 6.30 with our toddler and he (dh) just rolls over and sleeps till 9.30 or so. EVen at weekends he does this despite my rantings. He cant cook, hates shopping, never cleans or takes ds out without me. He's pretty useless really. Still, he makes more money than I.

We both work 40 hours/week (often more for me), but my commute totals 2.5-3 hrs/day compared to his 10 minutes. So he drops dd off and picks her up every day. Housework is definitely 50/50, but I do most of the cooking because I enjoy it.

Can't say that either of us iron! And we've just decided to have someone come in once a week to clean, change the beds and do a bit of laundry - I'm so excited! It seems all we've been doing with our free time is clean and run errands.

I am a SAHM and do all the housework. DH cycles to and from work so he washes his bike clothes and work clothes every night and hangs them up (except his socks for some reason. He always leaves them wet in the basket). I look after DS six days per week (DH goes for long bike ride every Sunday unless we go away). I get a lie in every second Friday and every Saturday while DH looks after DS. If we're both there then we do meals and nappy changes pretty equally.

When I go back to work we plan to do a complete role reversal and DH will be a SAHD, but I expect I will do more housework than he does now.

I think it's fair as I don't work and have plenty of time to do the housework and related chores. I wish he would at least check what is in our bank account now and then as I hate that he's absconded all responsibility. It's like I'm looking after two children sometimes.