TR and MoM's house of (un)happy

[MerlinsBeard]

Seeing as there is no feeling depressed and i know for a fact that a few of us could do with support right now.

I'm really glad I have helped someone else metatron, congrats on facing your washing

with huge thanks to mumsnet I am no longer afriad of my washing

I sent more to the laundry
and I then sorted it all and got rid of 5 binbagsof clothes to the charity

I am still ruthlessly cutting down as things come out of the washer/dryer

even hungover this morning I put the folded clothes (that i folded last night) away
hung the wet out on the line and went around the house pickiung up any stray and from washing baskets to put another wash on

MoM
please take care of yourself, you are important

5 binbags - wow! I have managed one to attic dd1 saved for dd2. two to the rag reclycing not even worth going to a charity shop one ikea bag to a friend for her dds and another one in the making.

how is everyone this mornng. I'm ok I suppose - plodding on. I have a huge prob with washing - its everywhere

hi all I think I'm ok
I am having trouble with a bursitis flare up in my left shoulder but still trying hard to keep head above water
washing not beating me yet

haven't showered

what is burstitis? Hope you are ok TR Sounds painful!

Did you get showered? I have spent the day looking (and smelling) like a tramp and just mooching around teh house. Sent DH on teh school and nursery runs.

I did manage a shower today
very proud of myself

I'm sad to hear your having a bad day again

Bursitis(sp?) is inflammation of the sac of fluidy type stuff (fat pad) between your joints

so in the shoulder right in the middle of the front joint mine has flared up I believe there are more than one in the shoulder, not sure though

my pain is very much at the front of my shoulder and lifting my arm or pushing against anyhting is agony and its hurting eeven when at rest

its doing my head in
and the main reason I forced myself ionto the shower as the heat may help which it did a little for a short time

oh well - went to docs yesterday - she is re referring me to mh team and has prescribed some ad's. still feel awful - not showered or brushed hair - I am a mess.

What did she put you on jrs?

I managed a shower the other day, had a quite positive day yday (for me anyway) despite the fact i haven;t taken meds for a couple of days managed to get out running which always helps except it was a disaster! Couldn't run as far as i wanted to as it had been too long, then i couldn't get my breath properly which turned into an asthma attack, during which i was stung by a wasp !!!

Am feeling like i have plateaued today - does that make sense?

Please may I join this thread?

I've just started on anti-ds today - 20mg paroxetine.

Have been having psychodynamic psychotherapy for the last 4 months too.

I feel like I'm improving - more smiley faces stuck on my calendar - but the days without a smiley face are worse than they've ever been.

I've tried everything not to take the anti-ds as am terrified of them - I've started exercising regularly, I've changed my diet, I've made sure I'm with other adults every day - but I think my children are suffering more than ever on my worst days.

So anti-ds it is

wow MoM that is a bad run

I hope you are taking your tabs now
you need to keep it up with them

squeak, it will take a while for the ad's to kick in, stick with them

absolutely PI**ING down with rain here
just got back from walking duke and the place is covered in dripping wet clothes drying lol

Hi FlamingoBingo

What is psychodynamic psychotherapy?

Maybe you need ADs to get over this particular hurdle and then review again in a month or so?

TR (or RT) Duke? a dog? Tis peeing down here too but it is manchester so kind of expected really

Have a morning of fabbo news which has put the day the right way up. Have a small photography job this week (not very much £ wise but its only taking pics of a building), DH got a fabbo gig opportunity, an album i did all the artwork for and DH did all the music side (ALL recording, mixing etc as well as orchestration) is on release as of NOW (although saying out of stock in HMV...hmmmm) and my lovely CM will take DS3 in Sept despite him not being 2 by then (she tales from 2 as it's easier for her)

have taken last nights tab this morning and will take todays later on

got Dr again on thurs. Think they have me on SH watch

MoM - lying on a couch and talking for an hour twice a week

It's hard work though. You kind of get worse before you get better. I've been depressed for 20+ years, and every time just put it down to whatever's happening in my life then - dissertation, having a baby etc. - and done something to deal with it like starting yoga, or waiting for it to get better.

In February I decided enough was enough, when I had the second meltdown that led to me swigging cheap brandy. So I started counselling. FIL who is a therapist found me one. Anyway, now, of course, I'm not putting a sticking plaster on it, but trying to get it all to heal from the bottom up, which is very painful.

Yes, I think I need the anti-ds for a few months to get me over this hurdle - you're right. I hate it though!

Hi everyone. This is totally what I need too. Am off work with depression, desperate to get back and get well but just really struggling. On multiple drugs. On my own with 2 yr old. Going to be moving home, job, nursery in 6 weeks. It's just so much. Every day is a real struggle. Luckily have sick pay so dd at nursery til 3:30 but I feel like I am a terrible mother. Sorry to whinge on. That's enough for now.

just off out to get dd but managed some sorting out that had been really hanging over me. Hope everyone else has had an ok day.

The thread died a few days ago, and was restarted today I noticed, so I guess it's a slow one anyway mousie.

Glad you had an ok day. Mine's going well too. Had therapy today and have decided anti-ds are a good decision after all.

not at all mousie, tis a slow thread at mo

Well, I will try and keep it going. There are names I recognise on here, be good to get to know people a bit better.
Every day seems such a struggle. The evening is a bit better but only because I know I can sleep soon. And a glass of wine or two helps, to be sure.

Well i don't drink wine but have tpo agree that i sleep better after a vodka or 2

Sleep is an issue for me, i can fall asleep alright but it's staying asleep i struggle with. Also have been wide awake at 5am for the last week

Got Drs again today - don't want to go, last time he literally shouted at me

hey MoM how did drs go?
Mine has put me on something beginning with s i think - need to pick it up from chemists and actually start it

MoM - that sounds grim. Could you try seeing a different GP?

squeak - I am sure they'll do better once they're in you and not in the packet!

I've had a tired struggling day, the sort of day with hiccups whatever you try to do. So frustrating.

god i HATE that man. I can't change as they have this thing about continuation of care which basically means we see the same Dr for the course of the illness.
I ended up lying to him about my eating but was truthful about feeling the meds aren't working. Yes i have a couple of good days but they are good days compared to the normal shitty ones so not good by anyones standards!! He has decided to keep on 20mg of citalopram for another month and then will either up the dose to 40mg or find something else. I can't have Fluoxetine as its not really a good idea with anorexia (seeing as one of the side effects SI anorexia) and not really wanting to be spaced out.

He is chasing up my referral to CBT (which i don't want to do) and has demanded that i make time to do this online CBT thing. He raised his voice at me again when i wouldn't let him weigh me

you really need to do the cbt thing

Are you really ready to get well?

I'm not being mean but I think I have only just become 'ready' and that is why I am managing in a way

It's so frustrating when the so-called professionals won't help. Why won't you let him weigh you? (not that you have to) What do you think he will do? Why don't you want to go to do CBT? How long have you been on the citalopram? I think all the SSRIs can depress your appetite, not just fluoxetine. I think if you booked an appointment with another doctor they can't stop you. It's your health, YOU need the best person to help YOU get better - and someone shouting at you is not that person.
DD whinging so better go!

I don't honestly know TR. I want the depression to go definatly. Eating wise - I don't want to go much lower in weight (am 7st 9) and i like how i am aside from my stomach-which will tone i know. I think i just need to get back into eating even if its just for the nutrition at the moment - going on the theory that some is better than none even if it's only salads for now. I don't want to any higher weight wise either so am at a stalemate with myself.

mousie, i didn't let him weigh me because when he weighed and measured me last time, he said if i had lost anymore thn he would send me straight to hospital. I have lost a couple of lbs since then. Yes SSRI's can cause loss of appetite but Fluoextine causes Anorexia and Bulimia - both of which i have struggled with since i was about 8 (prozac actually made me attempt suicide)