Elevenses !!!!!!

[MaryAnnSingleton]

ah, we can only do 1000, so here's the new one, hope you find it !

well I'm impressed !

Me too! Well done Hippi

Soup recipe sounds fab too!

Did you both have good weekends? Ours was lovely but really really busy. We had the neighbours little girl here for most of yesterday, which was good as we wanted to do some painting and it kept B occupied, but boy is she a handful! She turned up with her dad about 10 o'clock, could she come to play? Turns out he had a massive hangover, mum was at work, so he wanted to palm her off on us Of course we said yes - the girls were delighted to have the chance to play, but I did feel a bit used. Especially when he said send her back when you've had enough, and we tried and he sent them back saying he was off to Sainsburys Oh well, obviously need to develop a thicker skin and send B round the next time we feel like a day off!

God- that's cheeky of him !!

I thought so too! If we knew the family really well and had the kind of relationship where we could tell him that, it would be easier I think, but we've tried time and again to organise plays for B and their dd and it just seems to be when it benefits them. They have no desire to make friends as a family and have a glass of wine together or something. TBH I feel a bit of a mug and wonder of they had a good laugh about how gullible we are Am tempted to be busy if it happens again, but then B misses out on the chance of a play...

Oooh hotcross, that is a tough one!
Next time he drops his dd round, tell him that it is fine but you are going out in 2 hours so will have to drop her back then.
I like to have a time limit on these things
Having said that, O has a good friendship with the girl across the road (she is in Y6 at his school) and they are at each other's houses a lot. And we are on no more than nodding/saying hello terms with the parents (who are a wonderfully odd pair of hippies, he is an inventor who also works at Homebase and she is a pierced and tattood mature student - but they are fab in their differentness )
But I guess it is easier when they are bigger, plus the girl mostly comes over after school and I know she has to be home at 5.30 for tea.

yep, a time limit,which you stick to would be an answer !

Yes that's true, a time limit would help. I'm not really a time limit sort of person, hours can fly by and I hate clock-watching, so people are usually welcome as-and-when, but this one just irritated. I liked it that he said send her back when you've had enough, but I sort of expected he'd than have her, not send her back again I should have just insisted I suppose.... Oh it's a minefield!

Change subject.. We had a brilliant book group session yesterday. It was in S's house, and it was a relief because it wasn't an immaculate, palatial palace, just a lovely comfy family home with a bit of DIY going on. Thank goodness The book was fab too!

that is totally out of order,sending her back again - you aren't child minders just because he wants to go to Sainsbury's - I'd be very peed off... grrrrrrrr
Glad you had a good book group - what was the book ?

Book was 'A fine balance' by Rohinton Mistry. It wasn't a cheerful read, but it was the best book we've done so far for sheer amount and depth of discussion. I loved it, but then I always seem to like books set in the Far East. It taught me a lot about India that I knew nothing about, yet when I mentioned it to mum she had a good knowledge of the caste system and the politics of India in the 1970's. I would recommend it, some didn't particularly enjoy it but would still recommend it.

think my mum is reading that now (was given to her for her birthday)

Is she enjoying it?

she hasn't said - she was also reading a book I'd given her which we did for book group called Miss Garnetts Angel by Salley Vickers - she quite liked that one - I certainly did !
Am wading through the first chapters of this Labyrinth tome for b group

Morning Am here briefly before going to the hairdressers. Need to walk the woof too!

I have a dilemma and I know you ladies will have a sensible perspective for me... There is a mum at school who isn't widely liked, she comes across as very 'odd' really and her daughter is similarly a bit strange. Anyway, she seems to have taken a bit of a shine to me and I'm getting to know her a bit better can't shake her off.

This morning she asked if I smack B. I haven't, haven't needed to and she asked me how I manage not to. She said she was feeling guilty because her dd had knocked over the washing and she'd smacked her. I sort of tried to brush it under the carpet a bit saying 'it's not as if you smack her all the time', but it turns out she does quite often. So I said about not leaving bruises/really hurting, and she said she'd grabbed her by the arm really hard yesterday. I think she really is struggling and was asking for help. Question is how do I help her? I suggested speaking to the home/school worker and it turns out she broke an appointment with her last week. Do I mention it to the classteacher? Don't want to get her into trouble, but think she does need some support. WWYD? I can't just ignore it...

TBH I'm not desperate to get too involved with her, she has a tendency to ask inappropriate questions, invade personal space, and I feel she could almost be smothering with attention but I feel a bit heartless saying that. Others do completely ignore her, which I can't do.... Aaaaaaagh....

oh hotcross - that is a dilemma - and you are a kind person to talk to her - shame on the others. I wouldn't involve the teacher because I think that might be overstepping things a bit for the moment - I suppose that you will have to engage with her a bit more to try and see what the problem is and encourage her to see the home/school worker - she is obviously asking for help but perhaps can't take that big step. Of course it's not good for you either to be shouldering the responsibility of trying to help her and you may not want to get too involved with her otherwise you'll be stuck with her,iyswim. Is she a single parent ? Does the child seem withdrawn or anxious ?
Oh dear, I am not being much help- it's just difficult position for you to be in through your own kindness

Hope hair cut was a nice experience - I love going !
Had a really nice day yesterday - my friend S drove us to Dorking -never been before,though years and years ago I used to visit the surrounding area - anyway, we went to her niece's shop (The Fig Tree) -full of lovely (expensive) things..the most gorgeous gingham bedlinen which I love too- she kindly bought some of my hearts (and some of S's sweet Easter cards). Afterwards we had coffee and a pain au raisin at a nice cafe and then drove to Leith Hill where he parents are buried in a sweet graveyard,put plants on them..then home in time for the children !
It's parent consultations this evening !

Thank you for your wise words MASIt is a difficult one. The dd is over-the-top emotionally IYKWIM, constantly shrieking, pushing,pulling etc. I don't think it's directed at anyone in particular, just that she doesn't really know how to handle herself. She is also in all the lowest ability groups, but has an awareness of life beyond her years IME. The mum is a single parent, renowned in the area - everyone seems to have met her/know her and never in a good way All in all a sad situation and I'm sure school have recognised there is a problem, especially as they set up a meeting with the home/school worker but I feel a bit involved now... Will definitely recommend she tries to make another appointment.

Happier things. Your day in Dorking sounds fab I used to live that side of Guildford and regularly ended up in that area. There are some fantastic pubs in the villages around Dorking and lovely walks. Also there used to be a great bookshop there - don't know if it still exists. Well done for selling a few more hearts - may I ask how many you're making and in what time frame? I'm considering having a go at some homecrafting, but doubt I could produce enough in a short time frame.

Hairdresser was lovely. I was dreading it a bit as my hair has been a bit difficult to handle this time, but she spent ages checking lengths/thicknesses etc and has said live with it for a week and then come back if still a problem. She is lovely

Parents evening here tonight too!

good luck with it hotcross - but be wary of being sucked into someone else's probs, kind girl that you are !
Hair sounds great btw ...and good luck too for parents evening - am sure B will have glowing report. We have to get to different teachers at different times in different rooms - will be a bit of a whirl I know Was hoping to see Geography teacher as that is T's favourite subject,along with music, but he is booked up -we're to try to catch him in between or afterwards..will report back anyway !

forgot to say about hearts - they are really quick to make actually, ten minutes I'd say,now I've perfected my technique ! I've made a decent stock of small ones,in case of demand and will do a few more larger ones.

Good luck at parent's evening both of you

Your day out in Dorking sounds lovely MAS, and well done on selling some hearts

Hotcross, I don't really know what to advice re your dilemma. I would re-iterate MAS' excellent advice and make sure the lady makes another appointment. But be careful not to become her 'ear'!

Had my smear this morning, was fine, glad it is over. Nurse bent my ear big time about my weight. sob. But I guess I knew that would happen.

O went to a friend's house after school. I am suffering from house envy after I went to pick him up. They live in the next village along from ours, in what used to be a small 3 bed Victorian semi. It now boasts a tasteful extention across the back and into the loft and is a whopping 5 bed. And it is decorated in lovely florals and country cottage style. I love it! The boy's mum has a shop in said village selling those lovely bits and pieces - enamal soap dishes, metal buckets, decorative bits and bobs, just lovely. It was really tastefully done (the house) without being vomit-inducing Cath Kidston. Just lovely

oh hippi- well done with smear,I am not keen (who i!) on them but I do go whenever called,but need to psych myself up for it. Am sorry the nurse gave you a hard time about weight - does she not know you've lost six pounds ? Is it part of the smear nurse's remit ? suppose they have to cover all things,breast health,blood pressure etc at these things.
Parents evening was ok..2 of the teachers we'd booked to see were off sick (music and English) so we just saw the art,science,maths and geography teachers...managed to get to them all at about the right time and the nice geog. teacher who we couldn't get an appointment with kindly fitted us in- was worth it as he was very pleased with T. Art teacher was concerned that T is slow to start work in class and seems overcome by the bustle of the classroom,and both science and maths said he was very quiet and needs to ask and answer more questions in class. Anyway, glad it's over !
Friends house sounds delightful - I was immediately thinking, I wonder if her shop would sell my hearts !!

who is is obviously what I meant (about smear)...tsk

Well done T!! Parent's eve sounds good

The nurse did bp and weight before the smear. I think that is normal (is it?)
I did tell her I had lost 6 poiunds since mid January, but she told me half a pound a week is too slow. She also told me I am now officially morbidly obese and to come back in 10 days time and she will weigh me again. She also gave me loads of diet sheets etc.
The think is, I know I am obese, and I am trying. But it is so so so hard. And to be told you are officially huge by a health professional is ten times harder than admitting it to yourself. So I cried. Bit of a miserable appointment really.

Friend's shop may be interested in your hearts. I have never been inside the shop but know about it because she had a stall at the school Christmas Fair. Tbh if I went to the shop I'd feel obliged to buy something adn we are trying to cut down...although it is the kind of shop I would love!
But I can get all the contact details for you and if you are interested we can go and see her with the hearts
The cottage was just so so so well done. I fell in love with it instantly!

yes, come to think of it I was weighed and bp taken...
my best friend has often been told by nurses and doctors about being obese and she finds it very upsetting,mainly because in order to lose weight significantly she'd have to starve herself - she is fit and moderately healthy (she does have a number of health issues but unrelated,as far as I know to weight) She knows she is large but I think it's more the manner of health professionals lecturing her that is difficult. So sorry that you were upset
Quite understand about not wanting to go into your friend's shop- I always feel obliged to buy something in little shops -but it might be good to have the name/number - do you think she has email - I could send some pictures to her if so ?
Have been looking after friend P's middle boy who is home ill this morning - was nice and relaxing,sitting and reading and thinking up ideas for new drawings while he watched telly.

starve herself sounds a bit silly, she eats a very good and healthy diet-she's a great cook and always makes proper,good food for herself - she has figured out that if she eats very little then she can lose some weight but her pleasure in life would be much diminished - where is the joy in an undressed salad and a bit of plain fish ? (actually I like naked salad and eat tons of it ! but she doesn't like it !)
She reckons her metabolism has been messed being on diets since she was about eight

Starving or drastically reducing food intake is just not the answer is it? Because your metabolism changes and you end up having to eat less adn less over time to keep the weight off.
I have decided I am not going to 'starve' myself or deny myself the pleasure that is a nice meal. I am however going to increase my activity (not sure how yet, will ahve to be by walking as cannot afford the gym) adn am cutting out snacks and alcohol. (not that I drink much anyway only a glass of wine with dinner at the weekend)

The nurse said if I show a period of consistent weightloss (she did not say how much weight over how much time) she would get me to see the doctor about some help. She mentioned reductil and gastric banding. Was shocked by the last one, did not think I was that big.... [fret]

Oh hippi - gastric banding is far too extreme - please don't think you need that ! I reckon an increase in exercise is a great idea and cutting out snacks...a glass or two of wine is a necessary thing and good for you (I'm convinced that red wine is a health bonus!)