Are there a lot of nasty people about or is it just me that brings them out? and what should be done if anything?

[WideWebWitch]

I feel like some kind of middle class reactionary (which I'm not, I'm a fairly hard core Guardianista) but I'd be interested in hearing what people think about this.

While walking along a quiet 30mph country lane with dp and 2 children this afternoon, a car came racing along doing at least 50mph. He was going so fast I immediately shoved ds into the hedge to make sure he wasn't hit. We were walking on the right side of the road on a pavementless road in single file, in daylight. At the same time I threw my hands up in a 'what do you think you're doing' way. The guy stopped about 100yds on, opened his door wide enough (but didn't get out) to scream at me 'Yes, I'm using the road and I pay fing taxes, so f off, you f*ing slag.' How sweet, and in front of my children too! So my questions are:

Have I been living in the countryside for too long if I think this is disgusting, unacceptable behaviour?
Is this why people keep their mouths shut and walk on by while tossers like this get away with abusive language and attitude? In general, I mean.
Why are people like this?
Are people more like this then they used to be? Why?
Should I keep my mouth shut at all times? (some of you may remember I was screamed at in the park recently for daring to ask a lone 7yo if he was ok)
Has this sort of thing happened to you or do you just not ever do things like throw your hands up in disgust (I realise it may be me!)

This completely spoiled our walk, any and all views on this, NOT just on my specific incident, welcome.

Ooo hub2dee, you just mentioned one of those piffling little things that drive me nuts.

Not acknowledging that I have pulled over for oncoming cars! Arrgh! It's SO RUDE! I only want a little nod or wave ffs!!

There are a lot of elderly drivers (steam, fume) where we live and they are the worst culprits of incondsiderate driving round here.

Ok - deep breaths. Out with the bad air, in with the good (ala Peter Sellars)

The worst thing for me is that to my extreme shame I have found myself sucked into this sort of thing, occasionally - screaming abuse at people causing jams in our roads, yelling out of my car window, shouting back, the full works. But I have had to get a grip, and now I visualise myself as a calm reasonable force for good, and always flash for thanks if someone moves over or waits, make a point of saying 'good morning' to checkout operators etc etc.
Once I was waitnig at a crowded petrol station and in the chaos a guy mistakenly pushed in front of me. I screamed at him - and he said 'If you apologise, I will move out and let you go first'. he was so calm and reasonable I had no choice but to admit i was OTT, and say 'you're right, I was out of order'.
He did me a favour - it's really not a good idea where I live to shout back at aggresive people, you culd get badly hurt.

No worries, Pamina3.

Hey, Blu, yeah it is really worrying when the red mist descends on otherwise very normal / nice people...

Come on, hands up all the 'nice' people who have posted who need to admit to occasionally going ape and behavin live an ass ? Who hasn't succumbed when cut up (badly) by someone (whether intentioned or not)...

Maybe the reality is that all the 'nasty' people are us 'nice' people simply having a momentary blip that... due to synchronous forces operating in a random universe their blip has crossed paths with our existence on the space / time continuum.

Infact, if we all leave our houses 5 seconds later than when we were going to... none of these things would ever have happended ?????

Good points, Hub2Dee.

I honestly do think the best thing is to continue to establish 'good' standards as far as possible - otherwise the people having a bad moment - or the terminally bad-mannered - are setting the agenda. Also a calm response allows a sharp contrast which shows their own behaviour up so clearly.

But when I'm nasty, it's justified

This is a really interesting thread - and it sounds like some of you have had really awful experiences.
Don't know whether I've led a sheltered life or have just been lucky (hope this isn't tempted fate and that I'm going to meet violent a@@hole of the year later today ) but I have only had one remotely similar experience and that was with a woman, who followed me into my work car-parkand slapped me. It had started with a minor 'road rage' type incident, after which I'd told her what I thought of her driving and she'd decided that I deserved a slap - silly cow . To be honest, I'd do the same thing again.
Don't know why things are getting worse. There have been some very interesting and valid points made. It seems as though behaviour, which has always existed on the periphery of society, the lowest common denominator so to speak, has now become the norm. Don't know when this happened or why, but certainly 'bad' behaviour is more acceptable or rather accepted.
Just to end on a positive note, although I've had this bad experience, I've had many, many more where people have been nice, kind and helpful.

Just reviving this as it ocurred to me while standing in the post office to renew my road tax that paying road tax didn't entitle him to break the speed limit, anyway, WWW!

DH who is ex Special Forces so knows something about aggression always says that it is a good thing that handgun ownership is banned in this country as so many people would resort to it to settle disputes. He thinks the British have more latent aggression than Americans who are allowed handguns.

Case in point the schoolteacher who has recently been sent to jail. Normal person going berzerk. Seeing that case, I just think, 'There but for the grace of God go I.'

Agree Alux - I thought of this thread when I saw that report about her!