Can posters please stop prentending that they don't JUDGE people because we ALL do.

[LittleMissBliss]

I'm fed up of people saying oh don't judge what will that achive. If you judge you are smug etc. WE ALL JUDGE PEOPLE WE DON'T KNOW EVERY DAY!

By the house they live in.
Car they drive.
Clothes they wear.
religeon they follow.
The way the address their children.
They way they talk.

I'm sure we are all guilty of judging a complete stranger on the street.

Mutton dressed as lamb- Oh god look at her who does she think she is?
Hoodies- Better cross the street, they look dodgey.
Fake tan, fake hair, fake boobed girls- she mut be a stripper.
Older balding beer bellied bloke with beautiful Thai woman and mixed raced baby- she must be a mail order bride.

So can people stop posting what gives you the right to judge, unless they can honestly say that they do not judge others.

It is human nature to form opinions on others from small observations. I'm not saying its good to judge others. But just admit that you do!

I have a friend like this! Constantly dissing other people for being "judgemental" (which IMO is a judgement in itself).

But she still can't help giving out her opinion on baby names, taking the piss out of people's clothes and condemning people who drink/smoke/take drugs when pregnant.

It wouldn't be so bad if she didn't get on her high horse everytime someone else passes judgement.

Paologirl- I'm refering more to selfish acts or just damn right odd parenting decisions (some regarding feeding utter crap to babies/children) some that i would say are cruel.

paolosgirl - I think I agree with you that passing judgement on others is a way of testing one's own feelings and establishing what one's own values are. In fact, not "a" way, but the way.

There is a difference between making assumptions about people and judging them. From your OP it sounds as if you are embracing the fact that you have a very negative, sneering inner commentary about others. It's not something to be proud of.

Like Slubber says, if I find myself doing it I give myself a long hard

How do you get the time to worry about what other people are feeding their children?

Ranting- my spelling is rather crap English was my secound language as a child + i have mild dyslexia...But judge away like i said we all do!

And I don't buy all that 'oh I feel sorry for the children which is why I care if they eat a sausage roll'. It's crap. It's really a case of: 'oh I feel so much better about myself because I'm feeding my child organic humus and breadsticks.'

I've noticed the judgier the person the less likely they are to get their hands dirty and help people going though very difficult times.

I'm a snob.

A middle-class snob.

Wow, jimjam, now if that ain't judging!!!

MadamAnt- You are yourself judging me by my OP. My OP is not how i see others i was just trying to make a point. Are you saying you have never made a judgement on someone without talking to them. But from the way the present themselves? It just annoys me that people act like they don't judge when they judge others all the time.

i do judge, but what i try to do is stop and think about my knee jerk reaction and not just presume my first presumpstions are correct.

some things, IMO , are moral absolutes and i will judge harshly, many other things have many shades of grey, so i try to examine why i feel the way i do.

i try not to blurt out the first thing that pops into my head, and to think more about things and not take everything at superficial face value

Oh yes I'm quite happy to judge people for being narrow minded.

Every time I see someone wince/shake their head/ tut when I'm out with ds1 I think 'there goes a narrow minded buffon'

Actually these days I think fiofio's immortal lines 'kid loks normal, don't understand, will be a twat.'.

But I never judge first! If someone smiles they don't get judged a twat.

I don't in all honesty think that everyone 'thinks like that' to quote littlemissbliss, I find I can't personally be faffed to tut at what other people are feeding their children on a daily basis.

And personally I find other peoples obvious judginess regarding my mum (who is profoundly deaf) a little wearing, one shop assistant actually asked her if she was stupid, which says far more about the shop assistant than it would ever say about my mum.

Agree completely ranting.

So it seems as if the OP is right - everyone has the own judgy moments. If no-one judged, we'll all be living in the Dark Ages, slavery would still be acceptable and children would still be sent out to work.

Societal judgements are what moves things forward - for better, or in some cases, worse.

I'm not narrow minded if that is what you are implying jimjam. I just have clear views on what i think is the right thing to do and what is wrong. Certain actions do upset me, so i view them. But that does not mean i'm narrow minded.
look at you judging again!
I also smile allot.

That is not to say that a Fruit Shoot equates to slavery. I know what I mean!...

I think people who have the time/energy to judge what other people feed their kids are narrow minded. That's my judgment.

Many years ago I wrote about why juding the food a child eats might be misguided (when ds1 was first getting to the age when people were judging and a time when I was upset by it- couldn't give a monkey's now).

I couldn't be arsed to open the thread about smoking pregnant mothers.

Who's got the energy for all this judging, I certainly haven't.

but LMB hardly anything in this world (apart from moral absolutes and even those get a bit muddy) can be put in a right or wrong box.

You are, of course, perfectly allowed to mentally slot people into right or wrong catagories but why do it?

How does it benefit you?

jimjams - judging what other people feed their children is a way of establishing what one wishes to feed one's own children, and why.

If one ever feels slightly surprised when one sees someone feeding something to a child, one can examine one's feelings and analyse them and collect information to help one make an informed decision as to whether one's feelings were right or wrong...

Exactly Anna

I don't care what everyone is feeding their kids. I do have a life! I just posted once a while back about a mum at my young mums group feeding a young baby something that i found odd. Just wondered if it was a lack of education that's all.

I'm trying to be the next Jamie Oliver for peets sake. Sausage rolls don't bother me i'd probably eat them if i wasn't a Vegie.

Anna you do realise you sound ever so slightly like a robot in your last post?

I would have thought that examining one's feelings was about the very last skill one might expect of a robot