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Original poster

Cannot do a think with my 5yo and end up bored at home all the f-ing time

31 replies

SerendipitySmiles · 04/08/2023 13:28

I am so fed up and I know it's all me. I can't get my kid out of the house, literally. Unless he wants to do it he won't. At the moment I have two non working days to spent with him and I've come to hate them because we just end up in the house all day. I can't play all this time. The house is a rip, I do nothing I enjoy, I am so pissed of

OP posts:
Needmorelego · 04/08/2023 14:11

@HalloumiLuvver I would much rather stay home and find something to do than have to drag a moaning whinging child out and about - because that’s not great for mental health either (been there, done that).

Merapi · 04/08/2023 14:13

At that age he doesn't get to choose whether to go out or not. You do.

Be consistent and never give in to his tantrums. He kicks off like that so he can get his own way, so it is a learned behaviour. You need to reprogramme him.

areyouhavinglaugh · 04/08/2023 15:36

I remember those days! It's so frustrating, but I just went with it in the end and did stuff at home. Batch cooking , sorting crap out, emptying drawers of doom and lots of gardening.

If he's happy at home it's better than hanging out in a boring park with screaming kids 🤣

But another top is reverse psychology ...

In the morning you say "hey were staying in all day and I'm going to clean and work" or (whatever you have planned) I bet any money on earth he'll ask to go somewhere!
If not just chill at home, invite a friend over for coffee or whatever.

Marblessolveeverything · 04/08/2023 16:04

I think you need a bit of a reset and respite. Nothing like an argument with a little one to question your ability!

A couple of things that we did with my nephew who really absolutely hated "doing anything". We had a black board in the kitchen and used pictures for what the day would be.

We kept to a predictable routine - so after breakfast we get ready and we have play time. Then we have a small walk and then back to have snack etc. After lunch chill time and then a walk to go see ... anything you can get them interested in - cats/dogs/birds/cars/playground. Keep it as a routine, as reinforcement of routine can help if there is anxiety.

Wishing you strong coffee and patience of a saint!

UsingChangeofName · 04/08/2023 16:15

DaisyThistle · 04/08/2023 14:01

Two tips that often work with that age group:

1.) Try the technique of giving him two choices both of which suit you. E.g. 'After breakfast let's tidy away the dishes and wipe the table together (give him spoons to carry or a cloth to 'wipe' with) or you can play with your cars while I tidy up.' Both choices allow you to tidy up.
And
'Now we are going into town to buy some bread. Do you want to wear wellies and splash in puddles or do you want to go on your bike?' Both choices get him out the door.

  1. Agree with his emotional response but not his choice. E.g. if he say "Not go into town! you say, 'I know! wouldn't it be lovely to stay all cosy at home and play with cars all day. But we need some bread and cheese So let's go as quick as we can, and you can choose a nice loaf of bread and then we can come home and play with cars.

I tended to pick only the battles that mattered. If they didn't want coats on I carried the coat and they put it on if they got cold.

This is excellent advice.
It lets them feel they have some choice, some autonomy in their life, if you like, but you are setting the boundaries on what the choices are.

Original poster
SerendipitySmiles · 08/08/2023 12:18

Hi everyone. Thank you so much. I was in such a funk and had no one to reach out to so tried Mumsnet. I really appreciate you all getting back to me. BiscuitBiscuitDaffodilDaffodil

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