Push present ideas for my wife

[newdad1989]

Expectant dad her due first week of January 2023. (also my first post here for forgive me if I'm not using this correctly)

Grateful for push present ideas. I was thinking of jewellery - maybe a ring with the birthstone of the baby, or a necklace with the initial of the baby's name.

Also when do people give these presents? Is it literally right after giving birth or do you wait??

Thanks,

OP, ignore the haters, it's a fantastic idea! You know your wife better than anybody on here and will know what kind of thing she'd appreciate!

This necklace is beautiful, my friend received it as her 'push present' and wears it every day. The loops are symbolic of mum and baby.

www.georgjensen.com/en-gb/jewellery/necklaces-and-pendants/offspring-necklace-with-pendant-small/10012310.html

Loved the ring my husband gave me with our baby's birthstone so I think it is a lovely idea. Agree with waiting till they are born if they could be between two months!

DH gave me a silk kimono dressing gown after DD1. And flowers.

As far as jewellery goes think ahead, are you going to have more children? I have stacking rings with my DCs birthstones but didn't I buy them until my youngest was 5.

And don't call it a push present, horrible term.

fill the freezer with easy dinners
be attentive and supportive and do your share

Gold disc pendant that can be engraved with an initial at a later date.

I got a diamond eternity ring for first baby. Nowt for second! Ha ha!

Birth stone ring of the baby is a lovely idea. I'd love that. Not right after she's given birth, but either when you get home or when you visit her in hospital when she's settled. You sound like a nice husband, mine is lovely too, but would never occur to him to do something like this!

For immediately after the birth I would have loved a bundle of cosy stuff. Dressing gown, slippers, small bottle of prosecco (the one glass kind!), chocolates, pyjamas kind of thing. I think it's a great idea!

Horrible term for a beautiful beginning...being there as a supportive partner and a willing Dad is the most important thing.
I believe an eternity ring is traditional, after an engagement and wedding ring..but actions speak louder than rings....or any other gift!

If you think jewellery will be appreciated (in addition to your practical support) and you accept that her body will have changed to accommodate a new life over everything else..diamonds are supposed to signify forever, and birthstones show recognition of individuality

you shouldn't jump the gun because children can be born early or late, I'm pretty certain she won't be focusing on a one off trinket though

This .

I think it’s a lovely idea. I would’ve liked something to mark the start of my motherhood and the birth of the baby. I think the birthstone idea is really sweet so go for it! Wishing you guys the safe arrival of your little bundle of joy!

ignore the haters

I got a beautiful ring and i treasure it. Maybe let your wife decide, necklace is lovely until a baby starts pulling on it so might not get worn much for a while

Lovely idea. I would wait for a few weeks after the birth when she has recovered.
If you are confident you know her tastes then choose something yourself. I personally would prefer to be taken out to a jewellry/art/etc shop to choose for myself.
I personally couldn't stand the thought of a spa day straight after giving birth. I felt like a whale and don't really like those sorts of massages.
Something she could keep and hold its value to and pass on to the dc might be lovely.
I'm sure she will appreciate the thought.

My husband bought me lovely hand wash and hand cream as I went off on maternity leave. And whenever I smell it now (8 years later - a different tube) it reminds me of those fragile early days after our daughter was born. Which is both awful and wonderful. Later on I bought a ring with my girls' birthstones.

I 100% agree with this.

I got an eternity ring for my first and a watch for my second (DH got a watch that time too). I think it's nice to acknowledge that even in the most equal of relationships, the mother (or birth mother in the case of two women) shoulders and unequal share of the pregnancy, birth, breastfeeding, postnatal period and recovery etc over the 18 months or so from conception.

I largely agree with @MrsTerryPratchett Wait to see how it all goes. Buy her a gift if you want to but don't fixate on that- honestly, I'd have just been baffled if DH had pulled out some bit of jewellery after my first birth, it would have been like giving a gift to someone who's just been run over. It's just...not really about that.

Maybe play it by ear a bit.

DH bought me a Cartier watch I'd been wanting when I had DS1.
DS2 coincided with Mother's Day, and he bought me an eternity ring.

The term "push present" is gross, but the sentiment of getting a token to honor your wife for growing your baby and giving birth is not. My dad got my mum gifts when my siblings and I were born in late 70s/80s.

But if there's nothing she's had her eye on, a big bouquet of flowers, a massive cup of tea and her favorite food is always a good "immediate" gift after delivery! Then maybe take her shopping to choose something (if you can't surprise her).

Do all the night feeds. My husband did this as I had a bad labour and mental health got worse for the first few months of ds life.
He also got me a new fitness watch as I was desperate to lose the weight I'd gained, but I asked for that.

What the fuck is a push present?

My husband bought me a pampering gift set after I had our first son. It wasn’t a ‘push present’ - he hasn’t heard of the term and he hadn’t planned prior to the birth to buy me anything - He just wanted to treat me to something after he witnessed the birth of his first child, he was quite emotional. I was so happy when he came home from shopping with it as I wasn’t expecting anything and I really needed a pampering.

with our second son he surprised me with a diamond necklace when I was around 6 months pregnant. Again, it wasn’t so much a ‘push present’ he just wanted to show his appreciation of what I was doing all over again as he knew from experience the hard work and pain that goes into carrying and birthing a child.

I think the term ‘push present’ is cringy to most because it’s like it’s something that’s just expected before the birth and the emotions surrounding has been experienced. My advice will be to wait until after the birth, then let your feelings guide you so it comes from the heart, rather than because it’s something that people do.

My husband kept talking about it after our first but I got it into my head that it would somehow make him exempt from helping out and told him not to get anything. I think I was just tired and paranoid. Second time around he got me an eternity ring which he gave to me the following day while we were in hospital just us two and baby. It was really low key which was nice as it didn't take away from what I'd just achieved 🤣

it would have been like giving a gift to someone who's just been run over. It's just...not really about that.

Sorry @ToastAndJames but that properly made me laugh 😂

Apologies to anyone who has actually been run over!

If she has a c section instead of pushing the baby out, does she not get the present? Hideous term, I have never heard it before! I also felt traumatized by giving birth and would not have wanted an object that rewarded or reminded me of "pushing".

But I do think getting her something nice is a lovely idea. Not straight after, as she will want to focus on the baby and if she's like I was, anything you give her will seem to irrelevant when she has your beautiful baby in her arms. Maybe when you're home and there's a nice calm moment while baby is alseep.

The best present you can give her immediately after birth is making sure that you actually wake up during the first few nights to do nappy changes and feeds (or pass her the baby if she's breastfeeding) - it is very difficult to get up after a c-section or difficult vaginal birth, especially when you're cannulated/have a catheter/have 30 stitches. It's incredibly irritating to have to throw things at your partner to wake them up when the baby is crying because they're deeply asleep and you can't actually move from the bed to look after the baby.

You sound lovely OP. I'd honestly wait until after the birth and ask her if there's anything she'd like.