Should I report my health visitor? She shouted at my dog in my home?

[Anon1998]

We own a very excitable boxer dog, he gets excited by new faces and jumps up at strangers. For this reason, we keep him outside in a part of garden that’s fenced off when health professionals come, or another family member sits with him.

We've recently lost our spare front door key and my partner had took the front door key out with him. The health visitor turned up 25 minutes early. A family member was walking past and asked if they should call me as I hadn’t answered the door yet. I realised at this point I couldn’t let her in front door, and the dog was out the back.

I let her in the back gate and my dog, visibly excited, jumped up at the health visitor, leaving mud on her uniform. Far from ideal as I work in health care myself! She then shouted at my dog in a really abrupt, aggressive tone. Also, she called me someone else’s name the entire visit! If she had given me warning she was coming early I could have put my dog in a separate part of the garden which he can’t get out of. (I didn’t do this as she was about to walk off due to me not answering door
Immediately, I heard a family member pass asking if she wanted them to ring me, so I hurried to let her in back garden before she dashed off).

After she rang in for a new uniform, the visit began. She bombarded me with questions about how my dog is around my son, and 9 month old niece (already discussed he is calm and fine around children in previous visits). Her reasoning for this was because she said it took him a while to get off her whilst she shouted at him. Family members have said it’s unlikely that an excited dog is going to listen to a stranger that’s acted aggressive towards them on their “territory”.

I couldn’t have been more apologetic as I knew this would delay her schedule collecting a new uniform. However she raised her voice in my home.

I never normally have an issue with my health visitor however these past 2 visits I’ve felt abit patronised and spoken down too. She just jumps in before allowing me to finish my sentence. My son is teething and she asked if I’d given him anything, I replied “calpol”,
before I had the chance to say I’d only given him it on two occasions when I couldn’t get teething gel, she jumped in, telling me not to give him harsh stuff straight away. If she’d let me continue, I would of explained. She’s asked me if I have any info on weaning, I explained I help a lot with my niece whose weaning and have some books too. She warned me to ensure their up to date, I’m aware it’s her job to do this, but it’s the tone and way she says things. I wish she’d take some of my ideas on board before immediately shutting them down and enforcing her own agenda. (She works for NHS so I know she has to provide me guidance on these things as she told me).

I’m aware the stuff with the weaning and calpol is standard for them to check up on, I'm just giving a little background on previous visits. I just don’t like the manner she spoke to my dog in, in my home, around my son.

Apologies for the awful grammar I wrote
this in a hurry!

Then don't turn up to an appointment 25 minutes early!

@Anon1998 you don't have to see her!

I own 2 dogs and I would feel scared if an unknown dog jumped up on me.
We’ve trained ours not to, it wasn’t too difficult, just consistent boundaries and training over about a week.

Sorry it sounds chaotic to say the least, you cannot open the front door, because you've lost a key, the dog was jumping etc.

I don't blame her for shouting and I am sorry but everyone would shout at some point during a visit, a boxer dog jumping up is a good reason.

Of course she's concerned with your very excitable dog around small children.

I think health visitors can be a bit bossy, she should have gotten your name right and I hope you corrected her. Regarding the dog, she may have been frightened and also it is her job to make sure newborn babies are safe. You can't blame her for wondering if it was jumping up on her whether it was safe to be around a newborn. I wouldn't report her for this to be honest.

If you don’t find the HV helpful you really don’t have to see them.

Yes & usually she'd be able to
open the front door. Today she couldn't.

the only issue here is yet another HV treating a woman like a dim child.

So you say but, as she saw with her own eyes, the dog is out of control.

I think you've got a brass neck.

While I get that she’s clearly one of the opinionated pushy HV’s her reaction to your dog is perfectly reasonable, she could have been scared , allergic , maybe a bad past experience, a big bounding boxer mounting her isn’t ideal and reflects more poorly on you as it’s owner as you clearly don’t have full control over this dog than it does her reaction as I love dogs but I would have shouted too and been pretty angry at you

Sounds like you can't control your dog. I'd have done worse than shout at a dog jumping on me during the course of carrying out my work.

The health visitor service is optional, you can just opt out.

Correct 100%

I hope she reports you , never mind you reporting her! What a joke. Cannot stand this attitude. Dogs like that are repulsive to me. I would be absolutely terrified and then furious.

And to the pp who thought it was funny her dog repeatedly licking the visitors pen? That's absolutely disgusting, remember your precious dog spends half the day licking its own arse.

I don't even dislike dogs! Sometimes dog owners like this put me off dogs though which is not the actual dogs fault they are just being a dog !

I love dogs but if an unknown dog jumped up at me, I'd probably be quite spooked and might even shout at it too. And if that had happened in a setting where there's little ones, I think a normal response would be to check this wasn't a normal thing and that the kids were safe. I think that's due diligence, especially when there's been a lot of horrific dog/child deaths in the news in the last year.

As for getting your name wrong and patronising you, that's not on. I don't honestly think any of this is worth reporting but if you're not comfortable with her, definitely request someone new.

Are you looking to report her as you know she is going to voice concerns about your dog to try and discredit her?

This is your problem, not hers and I’ve had done exactly the same as she did in those circumstances.
You need to train and better control your dog, especially if the dog is around your baby.

People act different when they receive a shock or are frightened.

Her shouting was a response to an unexpected encounter with a boisterous dog, which she would have no idea whether was 'harmless' or had more aggressive tendencies. Her adrenaline will have kicked in and she reacted.

Others may have responded more calmly, others more dramatically perhaps, but you can't entirely blame her for reacting to a shock she wasn't anticipating.

The dirty uniform is annoying, and again you can't blame her for being irritated. I'm guessing she has a pressing schedule and stuff happening like this can throw her behind and be a real inconvenience.

I think you'd be rather petty and unreasonable to report her over this, the visit was soured by the dogs and your (in)actions not hers. I'd let this go and be more mindful of where the front door key should be in future for the sake of other guests to your home.

No, sorry you’re wrong and you need to understand that you can’t be letting your large breed dog (or small breed dog) jump up at professionals in your home. I doubt the woman was “being aggressive” she was asserting her self over your out of control animal. And you want to report her? For protecting herself?

Please don’t raise your kids this way ffs. We don’t need another generation of entitled arseholes

To be fair, that kind of dog is likely to get negative reactions. I would be the same. YABU

I think more like the Health visitor should be expressing her concern over your dog to the relevant authorities. She is also there to ensure a baby is in a safe environment.

What exactly are you going to report her for? Shouting at your dog? The dog you can’t control? You’ll be laughed at and laughed at and laughed at.

YABU. YOu should have spoken to her through the letter box or window and asked her to wait while you put the dog away.

I really think you need to understand a dog's needs better, so that things like this don't happen again with anybody.
You seem to be using the fact that she was late, amongst other things to add weight to your argument that she is in the wrong.
Poor HV and poor dog

You should of held your dog off.

She had every right to shout at a dog that’s jumping up at her.

Get your dog some proper training.

This is like one of those conversations when you are out walking and someone's dog jumps up at you and the person says, don't worry, the dog is friendly. So what! You should not under any circumstances have a dog jump up at people. Get your dog trained. I am sure she would not normally shout - she is entitled to shout if a dog jumps at her though. You'll be lucky if she doesn't ring the police.

As to the other stuff - that's a different thing, and you are entitled not to be talked over.

An out of control dog jumped on your HV
I work for one of the utilities and if a out of control fog jumped on me I would and I have kicked it out of the way
every year hundreds of workers get injured by peoples dogs
the fact she was early is irrelevant you shouldn’t of let her in if the dog wasn’t secure

she had no way of knowing if it was viscous or excitable

also the famous line that trotted out time and time again after a child s attacked by a dog
“ it’s very good with kids”

if we have concerns about a dog in a house we visit we inform social services

Well you weren't controlling the dog so she had to shout at the dog to deter it from jumping on her. Would you prefer her to kick it?

She got your name wrong because she was rattled.

It sounds like you got in a flap. It would have been fine to say simply, "You're much earlier than we expected, we've got a problem with the front door, just give me a moment to sort out the dog and I'll let you through the back gate". And then hold the dogs collar while she went through.

You're acting like she was a bailif or something. You know you can just say "no thanks" to Hvs?