wedding ettique help me please!!!

[ginnypotter]

ok if you were just invited to an evening reception (cheesy disco type thing) after the wedding would you....

a. expect your kids to be invited (there are kids at the main wedding but not sure what to do about evening only guests)?

b. expect to have to pay for drinks?

c. expect there to be a buffet?

please help, i'm not sure what people expect from an evening do, the people who have attended the wedding ceremony will have had 3 course meal at half 6 so imagining they won't want a buffet at 8, but not sure if people only invited to the evening do will be expecting food? and is it acceptable to have a pay bar? i don't want to offend people!!!

a. maybe
b. maybe
c. yes

I'm not much help but then I've never been to an evening do that I've enjoyed.

those 40 are just family and 3 close friends with their children, but there are LOADS of other people who we want to come, but logistically can't fit them all in to the ceremony room/dining room. also the oldies and those with toddlers will prob leave at 8 when the disco starts so we want to invite some more people to the evening do or the dance floor will be a bit empty! lol!

i don't want to miss celebrating with all my lovely friends, but i just can't fit them all in to the whole wedding

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Hang on I am talking complete rubbish in my trying to post on mumsnet and do dinner with baby pulling at my arm.

We didn't have a fork buffet at all. We had a finger buffet (was trying to think of how to sum up our mini burgers and fish and chips and salmon crostini things - which apparently is very fashionable these days )

in that case skip the sit-down meal, have a small ceremony 5pm ish then invite everyone to a buffet dinner and evening do?

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I'd love to go to an evening do!

We always miss it though cos of the DCs.

Bloody kids

fark buffet?

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big family cod so mine and dh2b's family and our 3 closest friends makes 40 people, but we have lots more friends who we want to celebrate with so the only way round it is to have evening do

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Good idea MrsB

We had limited numbers at registry office but then invited everyone else to buffet in afternoon followed by the evening do.

did you not hear me? eh? eh?

I invited family to main meal, then had a ceilidh at night and that's what friends were invited to.
We found that it worked really well.

I've only ever been to one wedding where there wasn't a pay bar, it's quite normal for us to go to a wedding and buy our own drinks.

We put on quite a simple buffet: sandwiches, sausage rolls and wedding cake with tea and coffee

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Well, I had to make myself clear as I have to distance myself from those 'Hilton' types. My mum wanted sausage rolls but I told her 'no Mum, don't you know that mini burgers ARE the new sausage rolls'.

Will have to get some next time I am buying a bbq for 100 people for a fiver.

we're having an early meal (4.30-6.30) cos the dc's will be 4 and 18months at the time and they will not hang on til 6/7 for their dinner! my mum is taking them home with her at bedtime so the grown ups can have some kid free fun! so want all the food to be done by half 6 ish....

so....basically you think i need to provide a buffet, maybe drinks, and not invite kids????????????

Definitely not kids.

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I had fun dancing with the kids at mine. But what do I know? We had Come on Eileen.

kids not staying for the buffet get pasta / nuggets etc while the grownups ahve canapes and champagne afetr the ceremony.

[prepares for lynching]
you can't schedule the whole day round your 2 kids if there are 100 otehr guests as well

good idea cod , can you have a corner with balloons and kids' party food early then lay on the finger buffet for adults later .