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Original poster

Shoes off policy in the home

211 replies

Metrobaby · 20/08/2004 14:10

I was just wondering if anyone has this policy in their home. If so, when people come to visit do you ask them to remove their shoes too? And if you visit other people's homes, do you take off your shoes or wait to be asked?

OP posts:
Yorkiegirl · 20/08/2004 14:12

Message withdrawn

allthegirls · 20/08/2004 14:13

I don't have a no shoe policy at my house but we have all wooden floors so easy to clean off any mud etc.

My friends parents always tell everyone to take off their shoes at the door but they have very expensive cream carpets throughout their house.

It has worked though as I believe the carpets are almost 10 years old and I have never seen a mark on them!!

TurnAgainCat · 20/08/2004 14:15

We have always had this policy, inherited from my parents. We have a tidy shoe rack near the door which makes it very obvious to visitors that we don't wear shoes inside. I always ask guests and babysitters politely, and no one has ever refused, except for two police officers, who had come to investigate something I had reported. They were full of apologies to me, but said that under their code of conduct they were prohibited from removing any item of clothing whilst on duty . When visiting friends, if I see all their shoes next to the door, we take ours off without being asked, otherwise I just copy what the hosts are doing.

sobernow · 20/08/2004 14:15

This reply has been deleted

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muddaofsuburbia · 20/08/2004 14:17

Metrobaby - I'm glad you started this thread! I'm fascinated by this!

I had never come across this "custom" until I moved to the South East. I would say most of my friends do this themselves and insist on it in their house. I don't expect it in my house and 5 years later I'm still slightly amused and curious by shoe shedding.

I can understand it if you have cream carpets etc, but tbh it's a very small step away from covering all your furniture in transparent plastic and for me, life's too short.

Of course I'll take my shoes off in other people's houses, but I have had so many near neck-breaking incidents on laminate flooring, that I'm very reluctant to do it unless people insist.

Mosschops30 · 20/08/2004 14:17

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hmb · 20/08/2004 14:18

We don't ask adults guests to remove shoes. I tend to ask kids to take their shoes off, would see the cut off at teeager level I suppose. We have a shoe box by the door. Most of my friends do this. I tend to ask if I don't know.

sobernow · 20/08/2004 14:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

edam · 20/08/2004 14:18

It's just rude, IMO. Can you imagine someone telling you to remove any other item of clothing? Your guests might be embarrassed about their feet ? it's part of the body that we normally keep covered in front of other people, except on the beach. They might have bunions, or holes in their socks (I'm such a slack housewife I often find the only clean ones have a damn hole!).

Unless you have guests wearing stilettos and the sort of floor that will be damaged (dh's parent's ground floor still bears the marks of dh's first girlfriend, 18 years ago).

I don't wear shoes around the house, not to protect the floors but because it's good for your feet (unless you stand on a drawing pin, of course). But I don't expect visitors to take off their shoes. No more than I expect them to take off their tops...

edam · 20/08/2004 14:19

... and people look so silly in their socks...

deegward · 20/08/2004 14:22

mudda, I'm glad that you pointed out that its a South East thing, as I too ws shocked when we moved here. My dad went mad when we tried to do it, and he looks silly sitting in his socks!

muddaofsuburbia · 20/08/2004 14:22

My great gran used to have knitted slippers for each member of the family no matter how unlikely it was that they visit her. She also kept slippers for visitors. So shoes were removed and slippers worn, but bare socks were absolutely abhorrent!

Yorkiegirl · 20/08/2004 14:24

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hmb · 20/08/2004 14:25

I got stricter about asking kids to take their shoes off when a friend of dd's ran into the house and spread dog s* all the way up the stair carpet

muddaofsuburbia · 20/08/2004 14:26

Feet are so ugly - it's just too personal to reveal unless you're really good friends with someone. (Or you're wearing these ! )

Plus the potential lingering smell at the door! Before I moved to England, it was such a no-no to remove shoes in the house, that people would apologise and ask permission before removing them - "I'm sorry, do you mind if I take my shoes off?" etc.

poppyseed · 20/08/2004 14:29

I was really strick with people when DS was crawling from a hygiene point of view. I couldn't stand the idea of him crawling through god knows what on our wooden floors. I have to say that it has still stuck now that he has begun to walk....

TurnAgainCat · 20/08/2004 14:30

I don't think it is rude to ask people to remove their shoes - in many cultures (basically everywhere east of Turkey) the idea of wearing outdoor shoes indoors is regarded as very dirty and it is an insult for someone to wear their shoes in your house.

muddaofsuburbia · 20/08/2004 14:34

Devil's advocate posting now... what if your guests are wearing flip flops or sandals and they neglect to mention their athlete's foot or veruccas? Eurgh..

posyhairdresser · 20/08/2004 14:34

In our culture I believe it is rude to ask visitors to remove their shoes.

However, I can see that it is a good idea in terms of keeping dirt and pollution out of the house.

poppyseed · 20/08/2004 14:37

Yuck - verrucas (water transmitted? and athletes foot are not a pleasant thought but I think that I would prefer them to dog s* ! [grin}....If I had to choose of course!!

poppyseed · 20/08/2004 14:37

That'll teach me to check posts...

lailag · 20/08/2004 14:39

We also don't wear shoes at home as dd puts every little dirt in her mouth. We don't ask people to do so but most do anyway.Except my sister, who however does expect us to take our shoes off in her house. But her excuse is probably because our house is so dirty. (She changes her clothes whenever she goes out, or has to go downstairs in her flat)

iota · 20/08/2004 14:50

We don't have a definite rule, but our shoes tend to come off for reasons of comfort and relaxation. Visitors are welcome to do whatever they feel comfortable with.
It's considerate to remove wet or dirty shoes, don't you think?

As for trailing in dirt - we get plenty of that from the cat...what do other pet owners do?

spacemonkey · 20/08/2004 14:56

I absolutely hate it when people ask me to take my shoes off. I really think it's rude (even though I can see the practical reasoning behind it)

edam · 20/08/2004 14:57

well said iota!

And for those who worry about 'normal' dirt, apart from dog st or muddy shoes, the hygiene hypothesis suggests that the dramatic rise in allergies in the developed world, which is at its worst in the UK, is because our environments are too clean. Children brought on farms have a much lower rate of allergies, as do younger siblings (who catch everything from their elders). Only a theory, but there is some evidence that it is one of the factors at play here.