I don't have big piles.

[QueenMortifauxcado]

Which is mightily impressive for sitting on a throne all day and existing primarily on carbs (and the odd avocado), isn't it?

Anyone else got an arse of steel?

But I want a little hog on a little stick! And marshmallows, does anyone have marshmallows?

Maybe if we dip the mini-hogs in honey they'll puff up to be pigmallows? They are full of gelatine after all.

Pigmallows sounds good. Just make sure to serve them on the stick.

S'pose we could use rats if not enough hog-lets.

Hold off on the rats, mallow based treats just turned up. Space star ordering, folks, quicker than amazon!

Rat-onna-stick, anyone?

My dear friend CMOT Dibbler has let me have an --out-of-date- competitively -priced batch.

CMOT has no friends, but I suppose we'll use those in the ansence of marshmallows and a pig.

But I have marshmallows. Really should see a doctor about the intermittent invisibility I've been having lately. Who's the medic around here?

I'm the drunkard. Princess had enough liaisons to know several I imagine.

I'm trying to imagine those marshmallow biscuits, but they sound about as right as jelly baby chicken legs.

They're actually very good. Like regular teacakes but tiny and actually delicious. Plus they look quite a lot like boobs.

I wonder what they are like when microwaved...Gooey? Big and puffy? Caramelised?

I'd let you know but I don't have a microwave. Though judging by my previous experience of owning one I'd guess at explodey, sticky and impossible to remove.

Seen any good bunfights today? Can't quite get stuck into any so far...

I have marshmallows

Ooooh! That sounds nasty!

Is it like herpes?

Apparently it's more like having extra boobs.

Nowt that I've noticed since the crap troll of last night, the one with the sausage. Am actually getting stuff done today it's that quiet.

Flappy, apparently it's an ingredient
m.drinksmixer.com/drink11920.html

I can't be doing with calling marshmallow biscuity things 'teacakes'. A teacake is essentially a barm, usually with raisins (but in parts of t'north without and suitable for encasing bacon or sausages). I've perfected a very delicate flaming technique for toasting the fruited sort.

Well don't look at me, I didn't name the things. Aren't the other kind of teacake just a rubbish hot cross bun though?

Flappy, apparently it's an ingredient

Oh?

I daresay it's like a lot of medical things - pretty nasty in itself but when used medicinally it can have its benefits (e.g. digitalis, penicillin, Michael Gove etc).

So what was this troll, then?

Was is a troll like you get on proper online threads, or was it a troll like lives under the bridge to CastleMortificdo?

Hmm, we never had a TrollMortificado or MortificadoTroll, did we? How dreadful is Mortificado that not even the trolls come here?

Our own troll usually manages to repel any attempted incomers. He's not such a bad sort, unless a goat is foolish enough to try to cross the moat.

No Pax - you are right. He/she/it is too shy to come out very often except to devour anyone or anything trip-trip-trapping over the bridge, plus typing with big hairy fingers can't be easy (so I surmise - my own fingers are tiny and slender, obviously).

But there is a Troll. Which is why goats tend not to flourish in Mortificado.

Just used instead of on another thread. Should stay here, really.