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Original poster

Oooh can we have a thread about things you said and thought about your Precious First Born which make you blush looking back on it

313 replies

Anchovy · 13/02/2007 10:34

Following on from the other thread which was veering that way.

My mum said she had seen a baby on the telly who was the same age as DS (three months) who seemed more alert than DS. I cried into a muslin.

OP posts:
MrsGoranVisnjic · 16/02/2007 18:14

isnt there a dad who does this on here?

Locksikas · 16/02/2007 18:26

Message withdrawn

jdd0709 · 16/02/2007 18:40

Oh this thread has meade me laugh so much - so much so that it is now 6.30pm, my 2 year old is sitting watching cbeebies and still has not had his dinner! (yes I swore he would NEVER watch anything on a TV except baby einstein) I did all of the things posted here and more with him - and am still doing some of them. Eg if dp goes out at night he has to have a full shower when he comes in at 4 am or whatever no matter how drunk as I don't want ds to inhale any of the smoke from his clothes (he doesn't smoke but pubs are smokey). I remember being devastade at 10 months when my bil gave him half a mcvities digestive that was NON-ORGANIC!!!! This is the worse though - we still use the breathing monitor on his cot even though he is 26 months!!!! To be fair, he is going in a bed this weekend and we will resist the urge to use it anymore. I am pg with no 2 and was fully intending to go to baby massage (again) - didn't realise how OTT that is ....

I think these things are normal and show that you love your child and want the best - you just calm down a bit after the first - got to be a good thing compared to the alternative horror stories of neglect you read about - by the way, I don't think reading to your child every day is terrible - I think it is admirable.

marymay · 16/02/2007 18:59

i love this thread.i did so many stupid things i wouldnt know where to start.

the best one so far has got to be the night vision.pmsl

clemsterdarcy · 16/02/2007 19:18

babysayshello.com is a fab website builder for birth announcements

i dont see anything bananas in using web to reach to pals in diff countries

oh dear i sent link to clients and work colleagues tho as well

a wee bit too far perhaps

clemsterdarcy · 16/02/2007 19:20

hmm also had babys first xmas cards made with her photo smack in middle

and ordered too many so spent N ge finding old contacts to send to

gawd i'm an eejit

Ceebee74 · 16/02/2007 19:21

This thread just gets funnier and funnier!

My colleagues sister (who is stopping with them this week) has a 2-month old DS and she was telling me that her sister carries an 'egg' thermometer with her EVERYWHERE and completely freaks out if it turns slightly orange - to the point that they are all freezing in their own home!

Bugmum · 16/02/2007 19:26

Oh God, I certainly had it.
Check: Picture of DS labelled in his Year Book, 'The most beautiful boy in the world'. Now he is two, can see he looked like a boss-eyed, scabby, skinned rabbit in a bigger boy's clothes.
Check: No pushing the buggy over uneven ground in case of giving him shaken baby syndrome.
Check: Searching for him in my bed, convinced I had fallen asleep and squashed him (and yep, like all you others, found him in his crib next to our bed).
And just my own madness: I remember when DS was just a couple of weeks old, weeping into DP's shoulder that when the HV came over the next day she would report us to Social Services as our house was so messy, and they would take DS away...
I believed this.
Now PG with no2, so wondering whether hormones will make me repeat any of it

ghosty · 16/02/2007 19:28

I remember my sister (childless at the time) telling my I was a neurotic mother because at my parents house I asked people not to flush the toilet in the night (bathroom next to baby's room) when we stayed there.
3 years later I felt very very smugly satisfied when she threw a wobbly at my brother for shutting a door too loudly when her DD was sleeping

WideWebWitch · 16/02/2007 20:27

Just popped in to say I'm glad to have made both quote of the week AND Mp's talk round up with my confession about the stairgate for one step!

tobysmumkent · 16/02/2007 22:45

Message withdrawn

Twinklemegan · 16/02/2007 23:15

Oh yes, I've just been reminded of those first few weeks when I woke in the middle of the night convinced I'd squashed DS (who as you all say was asleep in the moses basket). What IS that all about?

Moomin · 17/02/2007 00:10

God I am guffawing at some of these - they are PRICELESS

When I was on my 1st maternity leave I sent an email to a male gay friend of mine detailing dd1's routine for him in the minutest of detail. How he didn't bounce it straight back to me with 'WHATEVER' written all over it I don't know.

I also used to have an emergency plan for when I walked into town with dd in her pram; that is to say when a car lost control on the ring road, how I was going to push the pram into a bush trying to keep it upright and throw myself in the car's path.

I am mortified when I also remember throwing death stares at friends of MIL's who'd held dd when I was out of the room and had given her a teaspoon of custard when she was about 10 months old. CRIIIIINGE

Texan · 17/02/2007 07:06

I lived in the UK when my babies were small and am now living back in the States. These shopping trolley covers are EVERYWHERE over here. Sad to say, I would have rushed to buy one had they been available .... anything to protect my little ones from stranger germs . I mean, you never know who has been picking their nose whilst shopping.

trolleycover

PollyLogos · 17/02/2007 08:12

Well I think I'll get the prize here! In most aspects we've been pretty normal except one....

DS1 has always been a keen basketball player and (in our defence we were told he was talented) One year when he was about 14 i sent a round robin out at Christmas saying that he had been playing for the county team this year and that we had high hopes that he would play for Greece one day.

A couple of years later I compiled a whole file on info about getting basketball scholarships to US universities.

Now he's almost 18 and hasn't played for the last year.

We were VERY precocious about his abilities!

liath · 17/02/2007 14:35

Just been taking dd for a walk round the park and saw a CLASSIC piece of PFB behaviour (although in a rather sweet way ).

Saw a woman pushing a pram - she stopped to pick a crocus, then held it under her baby's nose to smell! Had a squint in the pram as I passed - the baby was a couple of months old at the most, definitely looked distinctly uninterested in smelling flowers, anyway!

2Happy · 17/02/2007 14:40

PMSL Liath. Mind you, dh got all excited when the air ambulance turned up at the hospital and insisted on pressing ds's face up to the window to see. When he was one day old. And that was ds2, not even the firstborn!!

liath · 17/02/2007 14:42

Good to see men aren't immune from newborn induced psychosis!

2Happy · 17/02/2007 14:43

"Ooh, look, look, ds2, a helicopter, look!"
"He can't focus past about 6 inches, dear..."
"But it's a helicopter!"
""

peachygirl · 17/02/2007 15:16

This thread is so funny

I am laughing so much it is making my C section scar hurt.

My DD is only 4 days old and so far I hope I have been quite calm BUT.. when told in the hospital I had to get food into DD one of the reasons I was so reluctant to do it (beside wanting to BF)was the vileness of the disposable teats.
I am about to make a chart to track her feeding ...but she was dehydrated and a bit jaundiced

I'm amazed that the post from cod has impecable spelling and also amazed no one else picked this up!!

peachygirl · 17/02/2007 15:28

I know my time PFB will come..

2nervesleft · 17/02/2007 16:18

Peachy -
I would have thought cods post was mostly cut and paste!

Congratulations on you pfb!

Justaboutmanaging · 17/02/2007 16:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WanderingTrolley · 17/02/2007 17:01

I've never had a pfb but this thread is making me rofl and now I'm seeing some maternal madness from my maternity nursing days in a new light:

When I agreed (as you do) that one lady's pfb was indeed, the loveliest thing I'd ever seen, she had to tell everyone - "He's soooo adorable, even the maternity nurse who's looked after hundreds of babies (a slight exaggeration) says he's the best baby she's ever seen, so we know it's not just us." Her family must've thought I was as barking as her.

I had a full set of instructions on how to look after a newborn - including the best way to load the washing machine, I kid you not - from one lady who had employed me on the basis of my years of experience in baby care.

Mum of 2 day old pfb: "Ooh! He knows his name - watch him when I call him: David! David! See - he blinked and looked very thoughtful." I can only suppose what she decided he was thinking because the next day they changed his name.

MrsHarry · 17/02/2007 21:17

So, just to be REALLY clear on a few things (am expecting PFB in June...)
Can you go to the toilet and leave PFB on its own in lounge? I thought this would be tantamount to child abuse! What about if your visit to toilet turns out to be longer than you expected....???!!

Don't you have to take baby into bathroom when you have a shower so you can see what they're doing????

Oh, and I really thought baby massage was a good thing, for encouraging 'calmness'. Is it just mad behaviour??

Bugger, I really thought I'd got my post-birth behaviour sorted....what do I know??!!Now think I'm in danger of complete madness...Help!!