Unfair Treatment of Parent and toodler in Pub

[nomik]

I'm looking for a bit of advice after what I feel was unfair treatment (possibly discrimination) to people with young children in a pub. A friend and I visited the White Hart pub in Richmond two Saturdays ago with my 20 month old boy. We carried the buggy up about 7 steps into the pub which is fine, however when we got into the pub a member of staff told us that the family area of this pub was up another 7 step! We were like...ok, but then the member of staff told us that no buggies are allowed in this area due to lack of space! (I have been in this part before, its a large room, much larger than many of the cafes I've taken the buggy into). So then I said, ok, are highchairs upstairs? To which the staff member replied, No we don't have highchairs, they take up too much room. To this response I was very shocked, how can we eat in here? We asked the staff member this, and his reply was very nonchalant, no alternative offered, basically he didn't care. Being shocked with this attitude we decided to leave, We spoke to the assistant manager before we left, who carried on the un-supportive attitude saying that it's a listed pub and there is no space, but when we asked what families should do with young children, he said that they should bring booster seats with them! I have since emailed the manager and the brewery, Youngs, to which the operations manager got back to me with a very unacceptable response, not answering any of my questions, saying they are not discriminating and that I could go to another Youngs pub which has more room. I emailed again asking her to answer my questions, to which she responded some days later with a very vague, not really answering anything I asked, nor even caring how they made me feel, nothing. I just want to know if anyone else has experience anything like this, as in all the 20 months I have been going to cafes, restaurants and pubs with my baby and his buggy, I have never had treatment like this before. If the pub was so small I would understand, but it really isn't, there is lots of room. I am so shocked they can't even accommodate highchairs and I feel other mums should now about this seeing that the White Hart is right on the river in Richmond and a popular location. I just feel that I have been discriminated against. I could have my son on my lap, but at 20 months, he doesn't sit still for a second! Plus, having a family room upstairs, I feel this is a bit dangerous too.

Don't you think 'don't be silly' is the giveaway though RJ. Along with "It's not "right to roam" you know. You don't have a right to eat anywhere you want with your 20mo and management just have to accommodate you. That's not how it works."

Nah, I don't.

I do think there's a lot of unhelpful comments on here, ok the op may have got it wrong but she wasn't ranting, she merely asked for advice, and out of them all that particular comment just depresses me.

I may go to FWR for a bit to see if it makes me feel better.

I think the OP's post was ludicrous. Frankly, I think she got away lightly.

One of these threads where it has been decreed that the OP was wrong, OP gets a tongue lashing that snowballs until there are definite bullying overtones from some posters, and then comes the varying degrees of self-justification for the nastiness. It is unpleasant and depressing.

As someone who lives in the borough and not too far from the pub, I think you are BU. Richmond is teeming with child friendly places and so it's not like there aren't places to go to a minutes walk from that pub. Yes, it's not child friendly but that's okay. Not every restaurant has to cater to kids. It's an odd business decision in Richmond but I am sure there are plenty of people who like kid free spaces.

I hope you have reported the 'bullying' posts then purple.

purple I've re-read the thread, I genuinely don't see 'bullying overtones' or 'self justification for nastiness' at all.

The OP named and shamed an actual business, including quoting members of their staff. What she said was potentially damaging to that business. Posters are entitled to respond to the points raised.

Several posters who are familiar with the business in question defended them from RL knowledge of the business and the demographic, fair enough.

At worst the responses gently laughed at the OP for being so PFB.

She's presumably left the thread because she's a bit embarrassed,

I'd pretty sure all the posters would have given the same responses to a RL friend, it wasn't a case of anonymous 'key board warriors' as you see on some threads.

Yes I would've said fer Christ sake Jenny* give yer heid a wobble

made up name *

** not actually made up, or I would call her Phlage-mud or summat.

Glad we've got that cleared up.

I'm sure when her children are older OP will be avoiding child friendly places like the plague. As everyone else in that position does.

Vivienne Most of my friends now have teens and even older'- some are almost 20.
We now deliberately avoid 'family friendly' type places* not just for us adults, but our teens don't actually want to be around young kids either.
I think it's just a normal phase really.

I'm currently doing some last minute packing for.a holiday..We know the area we are going to very well, and know which will be busy with young children, and those with a bit of a more adult field. We will, even without thinking naturally gravitate towards the more adult restaurants and bars, and ignore the child friendly places!