Are you anti-abortion? why?

[HAPPYFACE]

Reading another thread has made me keep thinking this question. I don't understand how anyone can be totally one way.
For me I think it is up to each person and I wouldn't judge anyones decision.
I personally think that whether to keep a child is complex. It changes your life forever when you have children! I don't see how it is beneficial to mother or child if their lives will be miserable.
You only get ONE LIFE and need to make the most of it.

Also...what about in the situation of falling pregnant on the pill to a man who unfortunately you loved who used to beat you and terrorize you? knowing that any baby to come from that relationship would be linked to this man forever? knowing that once a baby was born from this that there would be no escape, for you or the child?

But Rhubarb the abortion debate isn't just about SN, it's about who controls a woman's decision to have a child - her, or a combination of the state and the medical profession.

I agree with you that society needs to be changed so that women can have their babies (SN or NT) as and when they want them and are not put under pressure to abort; but as long as we have the world we have, rather than the world we want, to attack a woman's legal right to control her own body is a deeply reactionary viewpoint imo. And actually even when we have the world we want, a womans right to control her own body is sacrosanct in my book.

Oh pucca in that situation you should just hand the baby over to the father or get it adopted doncha know.

It's so simple.

HC... so sorry xxx

I know, having been through an abortion and had a baby, if I was raped, id keep it. But thats me.

I think the fact the option for abortion is there makes people less careful - because they can always abort if pregnancy occurs. I know babies grow inside mothers womb etc. etc., but I personally feel they are individuals. When does a baby become a baby? Why at 24 weeks and one day do they "exsist" as babies? What happens overnight? Nothing.

Its silly to bring men in to the argument (not that its an argument!) because they dont get pregnant. Yes, they have responsabilities etc., but, theres no getting away from the fact its women who conceive.

Just throwing in my opinion.... dont want an argument

I know, having been through an abortion and had a baby, if I was raped, id keep it. But thats me.

I think the fact the option for abortion is there makes people less careful - because they can always abort if pregnancy occurs. I know babies grow inside mothers womb etc. etc., but I personally feel they are individuals. When does a baby become a baby? Why at 24 weeks and one day do they "exsist" as babies? What happens overnight? Nothing.

Its silly to bring men in to the argument (not that its an argument!) because they dont get pregnant. Yes, they have responsabilities etc., but, theres no getting away from the fact its women who conceive.

Just throwing in my opinion.... dont want an argument

humphrey

thanks for sharing - that is very moving..and brings us back to the stark realities of this debate....and why sweeping statements are not helpful...

DDHW i agree with you - i am anti abortion and imo it is wrong, however i DO beleieve that victims of rape should have the choice of termination as they did not choose to be raped so did not choose to get pregnant. Although i do have strong views on this i would never dream of telling someone else what to and pressuring them in any way, whatever peoples decision im sure it would not have been an easy one!!

oooops, pressed twice.

Wonderful post HC.

Caligula you said; "I somehow don't think there's a queue of prospective adopters wanting babies with SN. Adoption services find it hard enough to place NT kids who are older than about 4, because people want babies. "

I would refute that, I personally know of people who have adopted children with special needs. And of course you are implying that babies with SN should be aborted rather than adopted because of this problem.

Yes there is a problem trying to place older children with families, but I don't think abortion solves this, sadly there are abusive parents everywhere whose children are taken from them, abortion does not solve that problem.

((humphrey)) Im sorry you had to go through that. In your situation it sounds like you made the best decision for your baby. No one can take that away from you. ((hugs)) xx

And no-one is saying that this is simple. Other arguments are being offered that you can either agree with or not, no-one is simplifying this.

The OP says, in defense of abortion 'You only get ONE LIFE and need to make the most of it'.

This attitude concerns me. Make the most of it even at the expense of the life of another? Though that other is your own?

We have become very selfish in the pursuit of our own individual needs. We are arrogant enough to think we can cheat nature, skew our journies to suit our own ambitions.

I believe in accepting what life throws at me. We never know why things happen or how they affect the bigger picture. I wouldn't want to change my path as there's so much learning and life enrichment to be had from challenging situations.

Also I agree with concerns about it being the thin end of the wedge. Already people can choose the sex of their baby, screen out genetic disorders .... next we'll have the technology to choose hair colour, nose shape and design our own babies.

I think Mother Nature is better at it. I hate humankind's arrogance and it's insistence on flying in the face of her. It's precisely this arrogance and selfish hedonism which has led us to begin the process of destroying our planet for good.

Not that I feel particularly strongly or anthing.

Some women have, yes but others couldn't and that's why we have to have the choice.

Ah well it is time for me to walk away from this thread.

Yes i have had a abortion (see my other post for reason) and i just can't be doing with reading all the anti abortion posts tbh, in a situation of getting pg to your DH/DP and it not really being planned, yes i am understanding why people would be against that, but in a situation of HC, or even mine (abusive partner, got pg on the pill) i don't know how some people can be so black/white.

Not that i would ever wish a terrible situation on anyone, maybe the people who are so "abortion is MURDER" should try putting themselves in others shoes.

I'm going to work now so can't stay and debate but will be back later.
If I was raped I would NEVER have an abortion and I would LIKE to think I would keep the child (such a complicated situation with dh and ds in the picture but just me then definately yes). Of course I would have bad feeling about the rape it would be a mortifying situation but I would have no bad feeling towards the child - it is not their fault.
The child would be 1/2 of me and related to ds it would be innocent, tiny and dependent. I would chose to nurture not MURDER it. I know this would be an extrememely difficult situation and not one I would chose but still I could not justify an abortion.
As for other comments made regarding the adoption of sn children then even if permenant homes couldn't be found then in my opinion even life in a childrens home is preferable to non-existance and a painful death.
These are not easy situations I agree but I stand by my conviction that the choice between LIFE and DEATH is an easy one, it's all the stuff that goes with it that is complicated.
Caligula why are you so angry and agressive - there really is no need!

Spider - very well put.

I'm not implying any such thing Rhubarb and I don't believe that. I strongly believe that it is the decision of the parents themselves and any other bugger shouldn't get a look-in. I would never say that someone who finds their child will have SN should abort that child, or not abort that child - I genuinely believe it is far too personal and painful a decision for anyone else to have a vote. I'm merely pointing out to whoever it was who riled me by implying that adoption is a nice easy solution that it's not true. And yes I've heard of people adopting children with SN too, but that doesn't mean it's a popular option and therefore an easy solution.

I think I shall go too before I get accused of being something I am not!

This thread is just so gonna blow and I really hope not because this is such a sensitive issue. Makes me wonder why the OP would choose to start this thread?

Sorry - I pressed send ages ago. Bloody laptop - my post was in response to abortion after rape.

I think I'm angry and aggressive because the use of the vulgar term "opens her legs" is a nasty mysogynistic expression which makes me angry tbh.

That's probably why.

For me personally, it hasn't been an option I'd chose.

However, I also made damn sure I did the best I could to avoid pregnancy - I used the Pill AND condoms.

The one time I didn't, I fell pregnant.

I accepted, however, that this was the result of my personal irresponsibility and was going to have and keep the baby.

I miscarried, however.

For me, it was about not makign others pay for my mistakes.

BUT I accept that circumstances may be different for others and therefore their decision may need to be different.

And also people shouting at other people that they've murdered their children... that makes me pretty angry too.