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Swagger Inn - 72. Fuck off Christmas, bollocks to you New Year, it's the Series Two Countdown!

999 replies

IsawMommyFolknSantaClaus · 18/12/2014 22:55

Woohoo!

Only those in need of hot beardy fuckers dressed in leather need enter.

Ayethengyoo.

Swagger Inn - 72. Fuck off Christmas, bollocks to you New Year, it's the Series Two Countdown!
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SisterHelenoftheEternalCatchUp · 21/12/2014 17:09

Friend despatched back home, beds prepared for ILs , washign done and hung to dry...

What did I miss? Have RBNRMuch... but have updated literature collection. (oof/thud etc)

Haven't watched US trailer (joins Sparks woth eyes shut and spaniel fingers in ears)

Ermm..... probably won't be up for the rewatch, will be packing.

SpanielFingers · 21/12/2014 17:11

Ok. So I did this really quickly, so if there are mistakes etc please forgive me.

It was meant to be comedy, but Aramis found little amusing about it. He glanced around at the crowd standing in front of the stage, raucous and laughing and felt out of place. Looking up at the boxes that lined the theatre his heart leapt at the sight of her. She obviously didn't find it funny either, sitting there alone, watching the audience more than the actors.
He caught her eyes, smiled slightly and bowed his head, his eyes holding hers. She inclined her head and smiled minutely.
He climbed the stairs to her box and paused by the curtain that gave the rich and aristocratic their privacy.
She half turned her head to him, he saw her slight smile again on her profile before she resumed watching the spectacle below her.
He pulled the heavy curtain across and approached her, already able to smell her perfume as he drew nearer.
Putting an arm round her waist and pulling her against his body he nuzzled her, breathing in deeply. Using his tongue to tease her neck and shoulders he slid a hand up her dress, sliding it round to grab her upper thigh and squeeze before moving up.
As he reached her swirling pussy, she gasped and her knees buckled. Not stopping his slow, gentle movements he tightened his arm around her waist and held her, taking her weight.
She leant her head back on his shoulder, bending it slightly so his mouth could continue it's work. Building up speed and pressure he teased her and held her until she came, shaking , knees turned to jelly and breathing hard. He lowered her onto her seat, smiling as he crouched in front of her. Unable to focus on anything other than the feel of his beard as it gently scratched her inner thighs as he licked and kissed his way up she grabbed hold of the wall in front of her.
Finally reaching his goal he used his fingers and his expert tongue to turn her into a quivering wreck. It was like an art form with Aramis, she had never felt so helpless and turned on before.
He quickly made her come, this wasn't the time to tease and tantalise her...but lifting his head to look at her, his chin shiny, he knew he had to fuck her and soon, his cock was straining against his breeches.
She stood to let him sit on her chair, unable to tear her eyes away as he undid his breeches. He took her hips and lifting her dress, pulled her down onto his cock. Burying his face in her shoulder he moaned as she leant forwards, again using the balcony wall to support herself. All he could do was hold onto her waist and hips as she took control, rocking her pelvis and grinding herself into him, feeling him fill her as he thrust against her.
Suddenly he pulled her back to him, his hips pushing him into her, biting down on her shoulder to stop himself from moaning as he came, fucking her harder now. She matched his thrusts by grinding down into him, gasping aloud as she too orgasmed, this time causing the patrons of the neighbouring box to look over at her.
She nodded politely, eyes bright with mirth, using her fan to hide her flushed cheeks and her smile.
He held her tightly against him and laughed quietly into her back.

TheSwedishChristmasMeatball · 21/12/2014 17:19

Oh, hi Fancy, sorry no scones Blush

TheSwedishChristmasMeatball · 21/12/2014 17:21

Oof, SpanielFingers Xmas Wink

We3KingyofOblomovAre · 21/12/2014 17:29

I'm afraid, sorry about this, but, Spaniels second porn, in the theatre with the curtain, was a Tiny bit cold and unloving fucking for my liking.

Irrespective of which episode it is tonight, I was surprised that Madame said that 8 was her least favourite.
Because it is one of my most favourites. .
I like 1. I like 8,9, and 10.
I like Athos and the doors meeting Milady.

My least favourite? Struggling. Porthos one. The one with the baby going over the bridge?

FancyFancy · 21/12/2014 17:30

She does sound like a right cow. Angry for being a bitch to toddlermouse too. I can see why you want to retain the right to finish her off yourself Grin

No need to apologise ww, it's not like I need any extra food at the moment!

Now I need to read spaniel's latest & then get on with cooking dinner.

TheSwedishChristmasMeatball · 21/12/2014 17:33

Mouse Shall some of us wenches "pay her a visit"? Xmas Angry

We3KingyofOblomovAre · 21/12/2014 17:33

Agree that mouses sil needs to go on the MrsB hit list.
So what nasty things can we do to her? Torture wise?

LastComtessIGaveYouMyHeart · 21/12/2014 17:34

Blimey Spaniel. I've had to hide in the loo at Mr C's golf team soirée to read that GrinGrin. Ooof.

So, I'm still not at home organising stuff which is where I need to be. Too many events and things to go to, I just want to go home and watch some crap on TV and finish my huge pile of stuff to wrap etc. Fucksake.

I will be rewatching but will be wrapping so may only comment at the end.

Lovely too see Team Aramis's appreciation of the true loveliness of Tom. Tis notedGrin.

Drink I'm pleased you finally got a TB dream. I'm sure he wouldn't be dry at all IRL. Deliciously moist I would imagine.Wink

Not wanting to spoiler the trailer etcetera. But I can tell you I've rewound the final bit about 100 times. And I need to get Cinnamon to make a thing of the final bit Athos says. It's full on Knicker-gush along the lines of Chartres. Oooof.

FancyFancy · 21/12/2014 17:43

oblomov - a hit & run by Santa's sleigh? I'm not sure mouse will be able to hold off that long though Grin

Don't worry comtess, if you were at home, spaniel's postings would be distracting you from what you need to get done, so you'd be no further forward.

NotEvenAnEnormouseStirred · 21/12/2014 17:52

Thanks guys.

I propose holding food out of her reach and getting her to ask for it in a foreign language. And not handing it over until she gets the phrase perfect.

God I really saw red. Toddlermouse wanted more carrots and the poor wee thing made it clear that's what he wanted but he was obviously struggling to ask properly for them. As Mr M and I both pointed out its difficult for him to manage single words let alone 'please aunty bitch not her name, but should be may I have some more carrots?'

'But how will he learn? He has no manners? He can't go through life pointing and grunting' Xmas Angry

Fuck off you daft cow. He's non verbal and has better manners than you fucking do. I'd have stabbed you with a fork by now.

SantisLittleHelper · 21/12/2014 17:57

oMFG. Dear god, am in such a state. Need this house of screeching teens to FRO.

Spaniels that was HOT. I I I can'tttttttttt

TheSwedishChristmasMeatball · 21/12/2014 18:00

OMG! I seriously want to kill her and I haven't even met her!!! Give Toddlermouse a big hug from Auntie WW!

TheSwedishChristmasMeatball · 21/12/2014 18:01

Comtesse I agree about that last bit with Athos. OMFG!!

FancyFancy · 21/12/2014 18:04

She's clueless isn't she? Not just about speech, but about learning altogether. I think fucktrumpet may be the word you're looking for.

NotEvenAnEnormouseStirred · 21/12/2014 18:06

Toddler is very happy and of course I'll give him a hug from you. He just looks at her like she's mad and helps himself to whatever he wants. Xmas Grin. He's a bit of a character.

FancyFancy · 21/12/2014 18:08

Dinner, really must start cooking it so I have a chance of making the rewatch, but I'm still struggling to close down that Aramis/Queen gif set.

That was hard

See you later

TheSwedishChristmasMeatball · 21/12/2014 18:09

Well done Toddlermouse Xmas Grin

NotEvenAnEnormouseStirred · 21/12/2014 18:13

Fucktrumpet indeed fancy. Obviously she knows better than us. Did I mention my qualifications are in behavioural psychology and Mr M's doing an MA in teaching English Xmas Grin

I feel much better so thanks loads guys. Back to the wonderful sf porn and scones.

SantisLittleHelper · 21/12/2014 18:14

Have just read it again.

If you have Virgin it's not channel 980, can't remember the number but it was near it & i managed to find it so can't be too difficult! Have set to record. Honestly, WTF BBC?

GoodQueenWenchAnneLass · 21/12/2014 18:19

It was like an art form with Aramis, she had never felt so helpless and turned on before.

Just,yes. Exactly this.

GoTellItToTheMavis · 21/12/2014 19:21

Aarrgggghhh the End of Term Lurgy will not be held at bay by cut price Shiraz any longer. I've had to resort to Shitesip.

Mouse - your SIL sounds like a right bitch

TheSwedishChristmasMeatball · 21/12/2014 19:29

Rewatching Sherlock Smile

SantisLittleHelper · 21/12/2014 19:33

I hope The Sewerage Man is not the start of a workman-based porn. Cos that wouldn't be a good one, quite frankly.

NotEvenAnEnormouseStirred · 21/12/2014 19:51

Oh mavis big cwtches to you. Hope the shitesip works.

Oh I could devote pages and pages to my SIL but I would bore everyone and it does no good to dwell. It's just a duty visit at Christmas and then the odd meeting where she'll be buffered by loads of people.

I'm turning to cheese, fancy chutney, the apprentice final and tulisker 10 year tonight. Tra la la la, peace and goodwill to all men, even complete bitches etc etc. Xmas Grin