if oyu give oyur kids no sugar or sweets ever

[LadyCodofCOdford]

what do you do when they get older?
i mean do you stop them till they are 18 secretly scoffing choc when they are in bed
do you give them vgradual exposure ot it like a drug meanign that the sweets become a sought after object of desire

or what

I'm curious to see how mine will come out. DS1 loves sweets so far, of almost any sort. DS2 seems more mad for carbs.

I've told the story before about dd1 having a foil covered chocolate ladybird in her christmas stocking and not finding out it was chocolate until March when the foil split when she was playing with it!

Oh, DS1 used to get given lollypops, and not know what they were. That was nice.

ha ha cod at your "bythe time we got to ds3 there was no hope". Same here. DS1 was monitered closely as a baby and used to prefer carrots to chocolate as he didn't know what chocolate was. Ds3 however was walking @ 12 month, immediately found the way to the biscuit cupboard and was signing "more" frantically beside it. Found him and ds1 having a biscuit raid on Sunday, both had found a stray packet and were hiding behind the kitchen cupboards scoffing the lot :o

I have to say I quite agree with Franny, all you can do is provide the best. If leter they make the worng choices, is their responsability isn't?

I think it is wrong to make a big deal of it. The forbidden fruit syndrome can be a bad thing. and is a tough line to walk I find...

DD (3.5 y old) never had sweets until last year. She never asked for them. Now, that I decide to give her a treat every now and then she became a sweet obsessed child....

Puddle, he is 3, so early days yet. I was pleasantly surprised by the not going mad at parties thing so far, but we will see. I expect he will eat crap when he's older - me and his dad did. But we came back to a healthier way of eating in the end.

We took him to some relatives at Christmas and they were laughing their heads off because he was sitting playing with all the pretty sweets from a tin of Quality Street, not having a clue what they were or asking for one.

I think he would ask for one now, post birthday box of chocolates

One thing I think is very unwise, is the use of sweets as a reward, generally. I waver about using sweets as the reward at the end of the meal, because at least that way, you can say, oh, if you're not hungry enough to eat your main, you're not hungry enough for pud.

But if you're using sweets as a general reward (for getting dressed, weeing in pot, etc) that really sends the message that sugar is a good goal. I've used magazines as general (big) rewards, and DS1 is now completely obsessed with magazines. Doesn't the same thing happen with sugar? A candy is a sign they've done something good, mummy loves them. So does that mean they grow up to give themselves candy when they're feeling down?

Yep, I agree NQC. I give quinoa as a reward, myself. Ds' quinoa chart (mounted on hemp paper) looks really fetching on his bedroom wall.

I certainly do, NQC!

(give myself chocolate when down, that is...)

no plan here Cod.
dd rarely gets sweet stuff at home but if we're out and it's offered I'm perfectly ok with her having some. definitely NOT fizzy drinks yet though, she's got plenty of time for those later!!
on the odd occasion when she has some chocolate at home I just love the way her saliva goes into overdrive and she looks like next door's Boxer!!!
know what you mean about Cadbury's versus Cote d'Or, Frenchgirl. Although, in early pregnancy I have had relapses and demanded Fruit and Nut at my local supermarket!! Haven't tried G&B... will give it a go next time I'm home, I'm sure it'll be a real hardship. :)
thanks to this thread, I now have an ENORMOUS craving for Rhubarb and Custards which is unlikely to be satisfied in this god-forsaken country :( :( :(

I liked this article last year.....

\link{http://www.guardian.co.uk/weekend/story/0,,1542389,00.html\here}

I use buttons as a reward for ds1 getting dressed if he won't - because it beats chasing him round the house. He's stronger than me now anyway- so holding a button up and saying "dressed then button" is worth it for the compliance.

I also use him asking for a biscuit as a way of making him eat his diinner. He often asks for a biscuit at dinner time now (becaus ehe's out in the kitchen and spots the cupboard). So if he does I say "mashed potato first then biscuit", it took a while to work because at first his definition of mashed potato was 1/2 teaspoon, but he now knows that he has to eat a reasonable amount. It's actually often eats better then because he;s focused on the reinforcer so he will actually sit and be fed, rather than me having to chase him round the house trying to get food into him.

I don't use it that much with the others, although its hard to have one rule for one and not for the other 2, especially when they tend to lose out in other ways, so I;m not 100% strict about it with them either.

I can;'t use anything else as a reward as often there is nothing else that he wants. Not having a desire for anything is a tricky one. He likes going for walks, so sometimes use that at tea time, "dinner first, then walk" but can't do that in the morning because would mean the other 2 being left alone.

I've never understood the 'if you ban things it makes them more attactive' arguement actually. Lots of things are banned in our house - cheerios, cheese strings, fruit shoots for example - I explain to my kids that they're not good for you so I'm not buying them and that's that.

My ds's school did a healthy eating week and it's been brilliant for him in making the link with what you put into your body and how well it works. he wants to be able to run as fast as possible and climb as high as possible so the healthy eating arguement works with him at the moment.

I think if they are not available at home then they accept that, but given the choice elsewhere they will choose them. But if they were available at home then they would probably choose them there too. So it's not banning them that makes them more attractive, it's availability that makes them the choice.

I agree with F&Z as my dss have very small appetites and every bite of something junky/sweet means one less spoonful of proper food. I have not banned sweets, they do have chocolate and ice lollies but only after meals. They don't really like cakes and biscuits.

My thinking is that if sweets are not the norm for them then hopefully they won't see food as entertainment/comfort and will only eat when hungry.

whats wrong with candy when feeling down?

I always eat choc when miserable and it makes me feel better.

chocolate releases endorphins in the brain

Most women have a messed up attitude to food and tend to overeat when they are feeling sad and unloved instead of actually taking care of themselves. I am not saying that is what you do, Enid, but surely you can see it's not a good idea to encourage children to think that a good way to cheer yourself up is to eat something?

franny I think that is fear of food tbh

it is possible to cheer yourself up through food and not have a fucked up attitude to it you know - in fact it can be quite a healthy way to cheer youself up (self- comforting is a good skill to learn)

Can anyone remember which MN’er was it that posted wanting ideas for a chocolate free easter egg hunt? Seem to remember she was quite put out when people suggested that a little bit of chocolate wouldn’t do her 18 month old any harm.

We have most things in moderation in this house. I don’t allow ds to stuff himself with crap, and I do get somewhat annoyed when my mum comes round just before dinner and hands ds a bag of dolly mixtures, but I certainly don’t ban sweets/chocolate etc. Having said that, DS was 2 and a half before he ever had smarties, but this was wonderful as I used them as an insentive to potty train him. And what a great insentive they were, because not only did he associate them with using the potty, but they were excellent for practicing colours as well. The only thing I will absolutely not allow ds to have is coke. He’s never asked for it though, and there are enough other sweet drinks, ribena/milkshake etc that imo he won’t have the need to ask for it for a very long time.

Agree with you about coke! Ds1 was trying to get some at the weekend- no chance- he had a small amount once when 2 and my god.

I think our house is a funny mix, DS1 has a sweet tooth and what in a normally developing child would be described as an easting disorder, so he has too many carbs and too much sugar. However because he cannot tolerate aspartame and a lot of crappy additives and reacts really badly to them (think 12 hours of screaming 24 hours after having aspartame) a lot of really crappy things are banned from the house. DH is the worst offender.

Personally I have wine when I'm fed up (and it is preventing me losing weight!)

My children have something sweet (small) every day - either homemade cake/bic or a small choc snack size bar or something similar.

I had a dairy milk the other night when feeling sad :) and it DID cheer me up!

never never never coke for my two though, I'm sure it would send them looopy!