How was your Christmas - good, bad or indifferent?

[handlemecarefully]

Mine was okay...but I am cursed by the character trait of 'perfectionism' - so most longed for events don't quite live up to the idealised picture I have built up in my mind. My 17 month old dd was uncharacteristically irritable most of the time (probably overwhelmed by all the relatives and the fuss being made of her)....and the relies got on my wick a bit here and there.

Still no major arguments or ructions, a few laughs and feel good moments.... Christmas dinner was cooked to perfection, and all of us got at least some nice pressies.

Would give the day an overall score of 6 out of 10.

Not too bad, got a bit drunk, got the usual odd selection of presents, was all over and done with quite quickly and painlessly.

Christmas Day evening 9/10
Christmas Day day 5/10

We didn't have lots of presents. We didn't even have a turkey (MIL has a pet turkey so didn't seem right!). Even so, at least a 9/10 because we spent the day laughing and with no tantrums.

Christmas day (me, dp, ds and new dd): 10/10 - lots of lazing about, no pressure to do anything, we had a loved up, wonderful day
Boxing day: dp took 2 hours to get ready, I got cross then we stropped off to my mum's 7/10
The day after: -10/10, huge family ruck, storming out all round Such a lovely time of year for everything coming to a head!
This week and since: wonderful, no-one getting dressed before midday, dp off work for the whole week, no plans, bliss.

Christmas day was really really good. It was the fuirst one DD was aware of and at 20 months she loved it all. WE drank, ate and had a great time together.

Boxing Day was let down by the lift company at our apartment so had to be rearranged at last minute. But we made the most of it and visited DH's familyt in the morning and then mine came over as planned in afternoon. All worked out well in the end though and we still enjoyed ourself.

Decided I'm not keen on xmas. Too much PUS (parallel universe syndrome- thanks Davros- love that).

The good thing was that ds1 has finally grasped the concept of opening presents, so felt almost normal for a while.

The good thing about not liking xmas is that I can forget its my birthday on xmas day, which becomes more appealing each year.

Had some good presents this year though.

Oh, Jimjams, I feel bad about posting this now.

Had a wonderful christmas day. Like hulababy's dd, mine is just old enough to appreciate presents and she loved them. Feel like a proper family now and it's the first Christmas I can remember in which I didn't give a toss about the telly (just as well, really).

PS A belated happy birthday to you, Jimjams!

Message withdrawn

Went over to my mums, DH miserable as he is home sick...it was actually like a really normal day. There was one highlight. My brother thought his beer tasted 'off' so asked me mum if they had use by dates on them. She turned the bottle upside down to check and poored the whole thing over him. When we screamed 'stop' she looked totally puzzled and spun the bottle thinking we were telling her the use by date was on the top. Beer everywhere.

I would give the day 7 out of 10

Oh Happy Belated Birthday from me too Jimjams

Started off great - kids woke up at 8.30am!! then at 10am we went over to the neighbours (my friends Inlaws) for drinks - local tradition which follows the Christmas Day Swim in the Sea

Intended to stay for an hour but finally left at 2pm - turkey well cooked so shoved on frozen roast potatoes and vegs. (Fortunately only us 5 for lunch). DH and I rather "merry" LOl and I managed to slice my thumb cutting something open and then dropped Christmas Pudding on the floor

Kids thought we were highly amusing as DH and I were singing "Humph the Camel had brown eyes" (song from DD2s Christmas Play) VERY loudly.

However, as afternoon went on we both felt rough as we felt the after-effects of our morning drinking session. By the time my mum and her partner came round tea-time, we were both ready for bed

Boxing Day was very good - my dad and stepmum, brother and girlfriend and stepsister and boyfriend came round for lunch and stayed all day.

No arguments erupted - got some fab presents - as usual completely spoilt by DH Kids loved all their gifts and they got lots of games so we've been playing those.

DH gone back to work today so we're having a "chill-out" day here as it's cold and raining.

happy birthday to jimjams and harman
we had a really nice day on xmas although very tiring as we only had 2 hours sleepwe're off to latvia tomorrow for the new year so if i don't post again
HAPPY NEW YEAR TO EVERYONE!!!!

pretty good, DS2 was angelchild, didn't cry all day; DS1 liked his pressies, DH and I spoiled each other and the dog paced herself and didn't throw up!! 8 / 10

Oh yes - forgot to mention my (minor) dissapointment: got up at 7am with dd and excitedly looked up and down the street because I wanted to see the lights on in the houses with kids and feel part of some kind of club.

There were none: Spanish children tend to go out and celebrate with their families Christmas eve and don't get back till late, and most receive their prezzies from the 3 kings on the 5th Jan rather than from F Christmas on Christmas day. I was quite put out!

Bloody awful. I hereby rescind every nice thing I have ever said about my (step)mother. Well actually that's wrong - she does treat me the same as her bio kids - she just treats us all abysmally. Spent Xmas Eve in our room at her house as DH didn't want me, and esp DD subjected to her drunken rantings, then on Xmas day she expected everything to be fine (despite telling my brother and sister (15 years old) that they were unforgivably awful and she never wanted to see either of them again only 8 hours before). Xmas night my senile G'ma (who lives with M&D even though she really needs full nursing care) wnet off on one and told everybody that Mum was a prositute and her war time boyfriend was going to come and rescue her.
Mum didn't spend any time with dd as dd was not all over her when we first arrived - and so Mum decided dd didn't like her and that was all my fault (she's 19 months ffs). Then Mum got v. angry that dd preffered my sister to her (well that's cos she was nice to her!) Dh has now decided that we are not going to my parents again. If Mum wants to see us she has to come to us, and we will not alow her to drink spirits and reserve the right to throw her out. Which I agree with, but I am just dreading her reaction when I tell her.
And worst of all I can see echoes of her in my own behavuiour, and I don't want to be her.

Disappointing, but only because I had a stomach upset - felt sick all day on Xmas day, didn't enjoy Xmas meal at all, went to bed early, woke up and was violently ill all Boxing Day morning. Still felt yuck on 27th at inlaws, finally felt nearly normal yesterday. I was disappointed because I love Xmas food and I haven't enjoyed any of it, so we're going to do a big roast on my birthday (early Jan) to make up for it!

prufrock, aren't mums silly! Had Christmas Day with dh, ds and dd; they woke up at 2am and were mega excited and loved their pressies. dh and I slobbed, and made no plans just had a laugh with pressies,dc and cat. Made me laugh when dh got cross with his own cooking! I wrecked it a few years ago so he cooked it and put far too much brandy in the sauce, birds enjoyed...Most chilled year yet as no rel's and turkey to pop in so early, 9/10..

P.S. prufrock does your mum throw her arms around dd as soon as in door, it wouldn't hurt!

There's a theme here.

Those of you who spent Christmas with 'nuclear' family rather than extended family (ie you, dh/dp and kids but no others) seemed to have a much better time of it!

prufrock, how grim.

I agree, hmc. We had a lovely cuddly start to the day, really enjoying opening pressies in bed, just the three of us. The second part, at my parents' house, was OK, but ds was a bit irritable and so was I. Oh, and of course the bit in between with the flat tyre - see other thread!

Oh its your birthday today Harman? My mind is not in full gear at all.

Happy Birthday, I hope DH behaves

OK - I can't get that keen on Christmas Day itself, spent a couple too many grim ones in the past; nothing to yours, Prufrock, but there was the one in 1998 where I had flu and pelvic inflammatory disease and a broken heart AND the one in 1999 when I visited my sister and her new baby only to get chucked by long-distance phone call on Christmas Eve...

...this year was fine, though somewhat overwhelmed by dp's rellies who are nice enough (much better than my parents!) but not people you can do what you'd like to, ie get massively pissed in seasonal fashion! Girls have coughs and colds too. So altogether about 7/10 I suppose, not bad but Could Do Better.

prufrock, that sounds really awful. is this typical behaviour on your mother's part or was she overwhelmed by the - ahem - "spirit" of christmas?

i do think you and dh have the right to see her on your own terms - but there's nothing stopping dh being the one to break the news of the revised visiting procedures if he is the one keen to get stricter about it all. it should be much easier for him to break the news, since he doesn't have the emotional baggage.

imo, it is highly unlikely you will turn into her. for one thing, if you're alert to the possibility, you can modify your behaviour (if necessary - not quite sure exactly what you mean by this) and for another it's not as though heredity will play its part.

what a shame. i hope you manage some kind of negotiated settlement soon.

Erm - it's typical behaviour for her to be overwhelmed by the spirit of Xmas! I was trying to be nice and accept that she is under so much stress because of Grandma, but then I realised that the words and phrases she was using to my little sis (really really viscous stuff) were exactly the things she had said to me 10 years ago when Grandma was completely OK. And what really upset me was when she couldn't be bothered to go and play with dd in the bath because "it's not as if she's bothered about me". Er - d'you think that could be because you only ever pay her any attention when your friends are there to see you being perfect Granny? It made me realise that she expects complete adoration from everybody without doing anything to get it, and that anything she does do is only so that people can tell her how wonderful she is. And I'm upset that I got upset, because I thought I'd stopped being the vulnerable person who needed her to love me to be able to love myself.
I'm worried that I'm going to turn into her because I already do teh same things but at a lesser level. The problems all started on Monday night when she came home from work to a very slighty less than spotless house so decided we'd all been sitting around all day whilst she worked, shopped etc, and became a complete stress bunny over it. Now I know that I will probably be in a similar mood when I go home to dh and dd tonight (The first thing I did when arrived home after having dd was complain to my dh that the clean towels in the bathroom weren't a matching set - anal, moi?) The difference is that when dh tells me to stop being ridiculous I will laugh at myself, wheras nobody would dare criticise my Mother. I'm just afraid that dh will stop stopping me from being my worst self. (god I sound pathetic)

I had the worst christmas I have EVER had!

My glandular fever kicked in and I spent most of it in bed or in tears cos I felt so awful. DH did his back in and spent most of it on the floor. DH and I had MASSIVE stand-up row with my Dad, my mum and my stepfather on Boxing Day.

DD was the only ray of light, she was a sweet little angel and made it all bearable.