A question for you: is SAHM/D a *job*?

[AllQuietOnThePippisFront]

That's it really.

Let me look it up too...

Yes its a job.

Great stuff!! I have done it. Thanks Bonsoir.

Mine is the antisocial peoplehating one.

But what are you Pippi? I'm an INTJ (the rarest sort of woman ).

pippi what were you?

I'v elooked it up too and tried to do it. Some questions were a bit tricky. Like do you use experience or feelings when making a decision...welll depends on what.

But anyway, I am an ENFJ. I dson't know if that is good or not. DH calls me a messy box of contradictions

I am slightly worried that Bill Clinton was an ENFJ. Must stay away from plump interns and cigar boxes.

You also need to look at how strong you are on each criterion. I am weakly "I" and moderately "T", but very strongly N and unbelievably J.

Anyway, the point I was trying to make was that your personality type determines how you undertake the tasks you have to do and whether you might perceive them as a job or not...

I am an ENFP. I couldnt look it up yet because I have 5 children under 6 running around. It was risky enough to take the test... Luckily they are all still alive. Will look it up later...

I agree with what you say about keeping the household ticking over Bonsoir. I am a SAHM because my DH has a job which involves us moving around the world working long and unpredictable hours. I think it is much easier for all of us if I don't work so the dcs have a stable environment wherever we go indeed I think I owe it to them to do that. In that respect I don't think I could outsource what I do - yes I could get a babysitter, but that wouldn't be their mum. I also think I have a much happier marriage as a result - we don't spend our free time bickering about whose turn it is to do what because I do the lions share (although I do know SAHMs who out source every domestic chore). I still don't think it is a job. The fact is that like you I'm lucky to have the luxury to choose what I do, but it is not the same as having a job. As I said before it is not job because by definition if you have a job then you can't be a SAHM and I don't actually have a problem with that. My choice - don't have to defend it to anybody.

For one just from the answer you could tell, if i didnt know already, that routine kills me, tackling tasks appeals to me less than working out how to, i like to be amongst people and move about...

I have two moderatively and two distinctively. Will update you soon.

OK Pippi, we'll wait

Lilian no, no defending on this thread. It is a non judgemental thread! (lets see fir how long!)

Oh and i am pretty sure i am too the rare kind

I'm very sure you are a rare sort, Pippi

Oh and one thing i'd like to add, thought it whilst chainedatthestove making dinner. Another point is this, which you also made Bonsoir, sahm is not the same for everyone, in the same way, say, that a PA job is. Some sahm have to do all housework, some outsorce it, some have help, some dont, some have 5 children some dont, some are single mum some feel as if they are some arent. There's no def of resp or duties, of hours, days off, breaks etc. It is all organised around personal circumstances.
Now some of this cannot be changed, the no of children etc but some could be. Everything is left at the mercy of ... What?

How much money you have? (In the case of out sourcing). How much help you have - dh availability/inclination, family nearby, your level of tolerance to mess (almost zero in my case!). That's why it is not a job - it's just life. Everyone has to organise these things whether they are a sahm or not. By the way, hats off to you for coping with 5 under 6! That's not a job it's a calling.

They are not all mine, i haste to add!

Oh Bonsoir, why oh why I am so in love with myself right now... the personality stuff is right there. And in two seconds has given rights to all I have been feeling. and [cheers] . I am a happy bunny.

But what are you, Pippi? E, and then what?

I agree on the validation thing

Sorry sorry just saw ENFP!

TBH it has not said anything that I didn't know but some years of marriage with prob a personality type not suited to mine shall we say (although at first very much of the soulmatey type it seemed), has made me doubt on my right to be me and in the right of anybody to be who they are. When for a long time you here that there is just one way of being, and that is not anywhere near your, well it takes its toll. But nevermind that!! Lets celebrate how good is to be me!!! Bonsoir I owe you one!!!

I think 'occupation' is possibly the best way of describing the term. It's a really interesting linguistic question! I don't think it's a job (though it's just as hard, if not harder than many jobs) as you don't get paid to do it. I also don't think it could be defined as a role because working mothers still have the 'role' of mother. I think occupation sums it up well because it is what keeps SAHMs incredibly occupied all day. Lifestyle choice - for some it would be a choice, for others it would not really be a choice, but a decision that was made for them e.g. because of financial circumstances.

a bit surprised that I got not T as I thought I was all thought and little feelings but hey...