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Caught redhanded being spoken about. What would you have done?

200 replies

tooshyshy · 03/10/2005 14:06

As this is a sentsitive matter I have changed my name although it would hardly take Miss Marple to figure out who I am.

Ok, this is going to be a little long winded but here goes.

A little while back Dh and I were really lucky to come into quite a bit of money, enough to sort out our debts buy a decent house outright and a couple of cars with enough money for a rainy day. We considered DH giving up his job but he decided against it and is pretty happy now he?s cut his hours down.

Don?t get me wrong, I am not trying to brag or be showy but it sets the scene for what happened last weekend which has really shaken me.

A few months ago we were asked to be (first time)god parents to our friend?s daughter, we were thrilled about it and that ceremony happened in August, for the sake of clarity I?ll call our god-daughterher Emily.

Last weekend we were invited out to Sunday lunch by those friends and their family who we are also starting to know quite well and there was one other family who we?d never met and were introduced to. We had a lovely time and towards the end of the meal Emily?s Uncle asked us if we?d like to be their son (Declan?s) god parents too, naturally we said yes, we were really delighted and we all had a little laugh about us being the role model god parents etc .

Anyway, I hope I am explaining this story properly. I went to the loo in the restaurant and whilst there I was shocked by what I heard, well no shocked isn?t the right word, gutted I think would be more appropriate.

Emily?s aunt was telling someone else, I wasn?t sure who that she had asked us to be god parents and we?d agreed which was fab as it would mean we?d get her son (Declan) huge gifts for life and he?d be ?sorted? for Christmases and birthdays, she also said she didn?t really like either my Dh or myself much but that wouldn?t bother her much as we?d come up with the goodies like we had done with Emily.

I just sat there in the cubicle trying not to breathe, hoping they wouldn?t hear me , then fantasizing about coming out and facing them, unfortunately I just didn?t have the bottle to do the latter (wish now in hindsight that I had) I was just way too embarrassed.

It?s left me feeling betrayed and used. I am now even wondering how genuine our relationship ever was with Emily?s mum and dad. I?m really confused and even questioning even really old friendships. Their motives, are they interested in me or do they see us as cash cows that they can milk when they need.

Sorry to ramble on but I haven?t managed to tell Dh yet as I know he would of blown his top if he?d heard about this. Look I know it's hardly like anyone's died or anything and I understand there will probably be some who will think this matter totally trivial but how on earth do I handle this situation? I feel like the rug has been pulled from under me right now.

OP posts:
LadyCodofCodford · 04/10/2005 17:34

in fact this IS almost unbelievable

tooshyshy · 04/10/2005 19:18

Hello. Can't be on here long have bath and bedtimes to sort. I don't want it sounding like I built my part up believe me I was in no way confident when I made my bill barb, I was shaking and could feel my face twitching (not like how it's done in he films) I tell you what though - being your typical, avoid all kind of confrontation, person am so relieved it's all over. I've never had to deal with anything like this before. What a sheltered life hey?

Karen was a bit gobsmacked, unfortunately for her I did go on and on and on about it all morning but she was very understanding, she just nodded and let me spill.

OP posts:
misdee · 04/10/2005 19:22

well done you!!

have you spoke to your dh about it?

Nightynight · 04/10/2005 20:00

rofl at this thread and its outcome.

I once overheard some girls bitching about me from the toilet, and yes, I too was frozen to the seat...it really isnt the moment you want to come charging out to confront them before you've even washed your hands.

meggymoo · 04/10/2005 20:35

Message withdrawn

TaiTai · 04/10/2005 20:43

Yes, the comment about the bill rocks. I bet it was empowering as you felt a bit annoyed with yourself for not confronting the Witch at the time.

What I want to know is, did she PAY her bill??

I'm also glad for you that you said your piece in front of Karen. That means the Witch can't lie about things (you said she's a good liar) to other members of the family because she is likely to get caught out. As I said before, don't necessarily assume that the Witch's DH feels the same way. As he and your DH have known eachother for years and are close, it is possible he had more honourable intentions! So, don't feel awkward about future gatherings. It is only one person that you know has behaved appallingly. Shame on all the "ooh" and "ah" women, but they probably didn't know how to react. When you're in a group it can be difficult to be the voice of dissent and pull someone up on what they're saying.

troutpout · 04/10/2005 21:14

brilliant!
well done you

melsy · 04/10/2005 21:42

I just couldnt go to bed until I read all of this and like in the cinema when these things happen, when you made the bill comment, imagined a loud cheer & appluase,BLOODY FANTASTIC. I am such a scaredy cat these days with things, so good on you girl!!!!! What was in your coffee , can I have some too!!!!

ThomBat · 04/10/2005 21:51

Oh how superb. I'm sorry you had to have this conversation at all, but the fact that you did - well the one you had couldn't have been more perfect. I love that she tried to get out of it and then got blasted again! I adore that you then pulled her up on her part of the bill. Just perfect. Well done you

Pip · 04/10/2005 22:18

Like all the others I've been following this thread with a mixture of horror and desire for revenge. So pleased you dished it. Well done. What a nasty piece of work she is. I hope you can relax a bit now and revel in your newfound MN heroine status!

Milge · 04/10/2005 22:30

Well done you WTG!

Redtartanlass · 04/10/2005 23:01

Good for you, you should put it all behind you now. It's better than TV

TaiTai · 05/10/2005 00:38

If you "put it all behind you", what else will we do for entertainment? You're our kick ass heroine now.

LadyMarinaofSarfLondon · 05/10/2005 10:16

That is just WONDERFUL. You probably don't want to tell us tooshy but I'd dearly love to know who our kick-ass heroine is in her usual incarnation on the boards
So pleased "Karen" saw and heard all of this, as others have said.

batters · 05/10/2005 10:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MiaouTheFamiliar · 05/10/2005 10:57

Fantastic!!!! I told dh about this last night - he thought it was brilliant too!

melissasmummy · 05/10/2005 12:08

Well done Tooshy! Way to go for confronting her!

Can believe she tried to dig her way out of the hole tho, she knew she did wrong & couldn't own up & say sorry! What a shallow person she really is!

You Rock!

The bill comment.......classic!

CeeTee · 05/10/2005 18:33

WAY TO GO TOOSHY!!! good job!
Now just send me some of that new found assertiveness!! I cringe at the thought of confrontation. Was it scary? Do you feel better now?

tooshyshy · 05/10/2005 21:07

Aw thanks everybody. Can't remember who asked but I have scanned through some of the posts and yes Sally did pay for her bill. [snmile]

Yes CeeCee it's was so scarey but I am so pleased that part of it is over. Am positively cocky now and even called an arrogant, hostile road rager an ass hole Her(sally) DH sent my DH an e mail too. Gets more and more interesting. At least the worse bit is over and done with.

OP posts:
misdee · 05/10/2005 21:09

was the email bad?

ks · 05/10/2005 21:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

tooshyshy · 05/10/2005 21:15

No Misdee. It wasn't it was very nice and apologetic. Her husband claims to be "gutted and disappointed"

Try as I might not to feel bad I do feel sorry for her now. i know she did a shitty thing but I don't want her getting into too much trouble. having said that I'm staying well away and have advised Dh to do likewise.

OP posts:
CeeTee · 05/10/2005 21:21

Well...You did your part. They can email all they want & you can go on with your life.
I'm very proud of you.

handlemecarefully · 06/10/2005 22:39

Oh yes tooshy - please tell us who you are. We only want to revere you ....

handlemecarefully · 06/10/2005 22:40

Perhaps a little cryptic clue....

Are you hatstand?