The One-Child Tea Room, version 21... the Hawaiian Islands. Cocktails, anyone?

[Jacksmama]

Welcome everyone to the 21st (!!!) One-Child Tea Room. Not to be misleading, we do have inhabitants who have or are planning more than one! Everyone is welcome.

The usual rules apply: no fisticuffs, or you will be escorted out by Mellors the Hunky Gardener. Depending on your preference, he looks variously like Daniel Craig, George Clooney, David Boreanaz, Gerard Depardieu... I have a feeling we all see something different but whatever we see makes us drool! And considering that this Tea Room is in the Hawaiian Islands, whoever we see is definitely shirtless! :o

Cocktails, non-alcoholic beverages, yummy food that is entirely without fattening effects, and lewd rolls abound in the Tea Room. There is also a full cappucino bar.

This is essentially A Tea Room of Requirement, and we're currently on the lovely sandy beaches of Maui, with beach huts, lounge chairs, cabanas, mango and papaya trees, and of course, lots of coffee directly from Kona.

Pop on in and stay a while. We may all seem a bit mad eccentric but we're very friendly!

CMOT are you waving with a bionic arm?

Sorry, I mean to reply to your email, been a bit busy

heck I took up a whole page!

::Can someone find MrScout for me and tell him he's late and that I'm finally hungry so he should hurry up with the dinner?::

::Waves at oxeye and is thankful for the purple cocktail topup::

not again, are you still waiting for that long lost onion?

::hugs Oxeye to her pneumatic bosom::

Hello, my lovely. I must got to bed now.

I think Serpent is glad not to have met me at work because I pretend here to be a Pushy Parent (am not actually pushy enough in RL and fear I rather failed MissTechno in her first couple of years at school because I let things go when really I should have acted) and they tend to make teachers' lives difficult. I am amazed at the number of threads in Primary Education which say things like the teacher gave my child a red pencil but they had asked for a green pencil - should I demand that she be sacked and placed in the stocks?

::Totters off to bed, weeping::

No, just dinner. MrScout was going to pick up something for me to make then had a message after 8 saying "I'll be late" then one soon after saying "Leaving now... be home around 10:30." Keep in mind he's home by 8 usually. But I knew this week and next was going to be rough - leaving at 5 a.m., home after 9 p.m. Ugh. Think there might be a pizza on the way.

Pass the patience pills please

Stupid me - I took the dog for a walk missed today programme with Riven on. Sounds horribly messy on her county's part.

I have a friend who has adopted four SEN children and her county are making noises about pulling her respite care. He dh has just been diagnosed with Mr C and she is, understandably, bleeerdy scared!!!!

Life seems so wrong right now doesn't it?

I did hear Womans hour - I liked the chat about the pill and feel it is a perfect excuse to play this:

and this:

there there my dear
reach for your inner Blue Stocking

Glory b tea
how lovely to see you my dear
your poor friend
yes that is sort of what I mean about poor Riven. Dreadful as her particular situation is what is worse is she is not alone

I think Jenny Murray has the most soothing voice in the world. I am sickening again and my throat feels sratchy. I think I should administer 5ml of jenny murrays voice every four hours

Yes - I would very much like Jenny and "him indoors" (who I bet is a right laugh) to move in next door... but then we wouldn't have the teenage branch of a family who also live up the road. The teens like to sit on a very big wall behind our place that they reach by climbing out of a bedroom window and sliding down the drain pipe a bit. They like smoking and flirting with various guests... and once waved at me in my kitchen when I was getting huffy at DH, in a dressing gown and wearing a... face mask!!!!

have you all gone to bed?

Tea - that is scary indeed for your friend. The Riven story has gone ballistic, she has de-regged from FB (don't know about MN but I wouldn't be surprised) to stop the media tracking her. That is the only trouble with giving them a crumb - they want the whole loaf and won't stop until they get it (rather like a belligerent bunch of swans I know down by Walton bridge...) - scary.

UniS - I think it is perfectly reasonable to write what you wrote and well done on the planning front!

techno - come come, we all know you're more bark than bite, m'dear!

POlytunnel for the next site? Why not? We can practise our greenfinger skills! Like the idea of the paddling pool in there as well.

Serpent - sorry to hear that Wriggle has been vile - miniT goes through phases of that as well at the mo, but then he comes and tells me he's "very sorry Mummy" which helps.:)

Just had an email from my managing agent - they've disconnected the gas oven and left it in the middle of the kitchen - couldn't find the electricity cable (didn't look very hard, if you ask me) so I phoned Dad in a tizz and he's going to see what he can do to find a decent Sparks to take over there asap and work out how to get the electric cabling sorted out. And my BIL will hopefully be able to pick up the gas oven to dispose of it.

Unserp - Milk was vile today too. She PUSHED a friend off of an artificial ruin and thus left the park early and in shame! Only to pull a bottle of milk out of my bag take the lid off and push her way up the crowded bus shouting "Careful of my milk"... to a bus full of very afraid Parisians. FFS, milk, some of the women were wearing fur - does she not realise how much it would cost in money and ethics to replace were she to ruin a coat with milk???

When she got home she tied the dog up and... no I can't bare to go on!!!

loving Milk's way of getting a seat on the bus. I might try it tomorrow.....

You guys pot too much after I am in bed!

I also admire milk's ability to get a seat on the bus.

Not sure of the weather but I think we are off to the park.

I may use Milk's technique for getting to the bar in the local pub, too.

Morning everyone! How are we all?

UniS, splendid tops!

Norfolk, grr re your friends. Had that in the past from a group of NCT mums and it was Not Pleasant.

Tea, words fail re your friend. What sort of blithering idiot would suggest pulling the care away from that family right now

Tea, that is horrendous.

How are you doing today Amber ?

DHs birthday today - and he reappeared from his couple of days in the smoke excited as a job has come up in his dream area. Which would mean global travel, and working up town at least 3 days a week. I suppose there must be a way of making it happen if he got offered the job

Do you want the answer to how I am right now, or the how I was when I woke up this morning? I'll go for 'feeling great right now thanks' but if anyone ever says that waiting for test results for possible BC is easy, I'll poke 'em in the eye.

Heck re your DH, CMOT. You need him there, surely, with your hand still giving you more challenges than you were hoping for?? Or does extra money mean that he'd be suggesting a host of paid-for helpful individuals to take care of things in his absence??

CMOTD - what is happening with your job? Are you carrying on as normal or are you on sick leave because of your wrist? ANd if your DH took this job, would you have to alter yours? can't have both of you globe-trotting at the same time with the Tiddler around; are their grandparents nearby who could look after him?
Happy Birthday to him anyway.

Amber - remember what your fabby GP told you and that will always help :)

Its never easy - and worse when theres no clear answer either.

I'm working ft as normal - doing all the travel (a big up to Hertz for the ease of hiring adapted cars at no extra cost btw) - we would be able to avoid being away away at the same time, but would need cover help like yesterday when I had to go to the office and so wasn't home till 9. I can usually cope without DH though in terms of everyday stuff.

No family help, so its up to us to decide what to do and arrange/finance it. Actually my mum is getting worse, fast, so may need to organise care for her soon too

Oh no, :( to hear that about your Mum, CMOTD.

CMOT, you need a Mellors shoulder massage, I think, with a large cuppa?

Thumb, yes, you're right. I wish my brain would behave itself from time to time.

My son does not want to play with me. So I thought I'd come play with y'all.

I need some chocolate, who can hook me up?

Sorry to hear bout your mum, CMOTD.

Amber, we are waiting for further tests on my DH for his liver, so I am right there with you on the 'waiting sucks' school. Some enzyme is too high and he's been sent to a consultant and such. We've agreed no booze until after he sees the consultant. ::Faints::

Belfast covered with frost this morning. Still went to the park so LCT could run around.

Tee, eek re dh and his liver enzyme waiting.

::passes over large bar of choc of exactly the right sort::

New software on the work computers - all now running to the latest Microsoft offerings. This'll be a fun afternoon...(!)

Thanks Amber!

Just spent my birthday money from my mum on software for my company. I'm such a geek!