The One-Child Tea Room, version 21... the Hawaiian Islands. Cocktails, anyone?

[Jacksmama]

Welcome everyone to the 21st (!!!) One-Child Tea Room. Not to be misleading, we do have inhabitants who have or are planning more than one! Everyone is welcome.

The usual rules apply: no fisticuffs, or you will be escorted out by Mellors the Hunky Gardener. Depending on your preference, he looks variously like Daniel Craig, George Clooney, David Boreanaz, Gerard Depardieu... I have a feeling we all see something different but whatever we see makes us drool! And considering that this Tea Room is in the Hawaiian Islands, whoever we see is definitely shirtless! :o

Cocktails, non-alcoholic beverages, yummy food that is entirely without fattening effects, and lewd rolls abound in the Tea Room. There is also a full cappucino bar.

This is essentially A Tea Room of Requirement, and we're currently on the lovely sandy beaches of Maui, with beach huts, lounge chairs, cabanas, mango and papaya trees, and of course, lots of coffee directly from Kona.

Pop on in and stay a while. We may all seem a bit mad eccentric but we're very friendly!

Oh dear UniS, that sounds grim! You don't sound like a snob at all - I lean toward the foodie and wine-y myself.

Tee, hi there, sorry I didn't say welcome earlier. I'm the Tea Room's Canadian Content. I live in the Pacific Northwest, near Vancouver, British Columbia. DS is nearly three. Where are you from? I went to school in Dallas, TX, for 6 years - at the time I left, that was nearly a fifth of my life :o

Thank you for teh reassurance JM. Gosh, you guys have moved about a bit havn;t you. I think I've moved a lot, but nothing like your distances, I just moved hose lots of times. 22+

You're welcome. I nearly ed at the idea of topping up glasses of horrid plonk with different bottles of horrid plonk. Reminds me of a wedding I went to in my 20's, one of my friends swore up and down that there was no such thing as rose wine, but rather that restaurants mixed red and white. WTH???? She proceeded to try and demonstrate, producing utterly shite pink wine. We all laughed our arses off. And she was not drunk!!! This is the same friend who swore that airplanes just parked in the sky so as not to run out of fuel when placed in a queue for approach to the airport. She said that only older airplanes didn't have the "park" feature and had to fly circles...

I'm just trying to count how many different houses/apartments etc I've lived in. Counting university dorms and moving twice within the same apartment complex in Dallas, I've come up with 24. The townhouse DH and I live in now is the third-longest I've ever lived anywhere - just over 5 years.

I've moved house 5 times in my lifetime, all within the same town. One day I shall be brave enough to move to somewhere that isn't here. We did own a house in another town for a while, but never lived in it. DH has already lived all over the place, including the USA (Washington DC), so doesn't mind settling in one place, luckily.

I was woken at 5.55 am by Mr S the new cat, who had figured out the door handle to the bedroom, and put his nose on mine until I opened my eyes. Not quite the wake-up I was hoping for, I'll be honest.

I grew up in Connecticut but I've lived all up and down the East Coast, then in the Mid-west and then was finally living in California when I met my husband on the internet in 2001 and moved to Belfast in 2003.

I looked into becoming a UK citizen but cannot be bothered! My son has two passports, though. He can actually have an Irish one as well, if he wants, but we decided he can pay for do that when he's older if he wants. We call him the International Man of Mystery .

JM mixing red and white?

Unis also at the idea of topping up bad wine with more bad wine. So glad you're home where life is sane! Oh, and I'm also a bit of a food and wine snob, not that I don't enjoy a good fish finger and chip supper now and then!

What wines get your vote?

Should that be 'which wines'? Can't remember. I think my grammar has gone missing.

I think it should be which. But don't quote me on that!

We don't have much cash, and I'm a cheapskate, so I tend to buy cheap, but decent wines, or ones on special. Castillero de Diablo (which I am spelling wrong) Cabernet Savigoun is really very good for the price, as this their Savingoun Blanc. Also really really like Banrock Station, any variety. It's a newish (so far as I can see) vineyard from Australia that makes excellent whites.

Please excuse my spelling. French isn't even a second language for me!

Oh and I have never found a Shiraz that I thought was drinkable!

I agree. Banrock is one of my favourites as well. Cabernet Sauvignon is splendid stuff. Shiraz has to be from one of the best vineyards for it to be any good. A lot of the mid priced and cheaper ones are strong enough to knock your socks off (to use a strange expression ). Vina Sol is often on special offer round here and is very light and fruity.

Every Shiraz I have ever tasted is just so harsh. Knock your socks off is an understatement!

I was just on the Banrock website and they do make reds, but definitely concentrate on white. Too bad they can't ship overseas, I'd order directly from them!

I moved 16 times before I was eight. Then we (my parents) have been in the same house since. I went away to uni and had two different rooms there (opted to stay in the dorm). Lived in Minnesota for nearly four years (one month temp accommodation and the rest of my time in the same apartment I rented). Moved home (to my parents') briefly in preparation for moving to the UK. Got engaged while living with my parents, so made the visa thing a bit easier (and a bit harder). We've lived in the same house in England, though we did almost move to the other end of the town two years ago. Mixed blessing we didn't -- would have been lots more space (yay!) but might not be able to be a SAHM with BabyScout (boo).

Going home to Scoutshire today -- YAY!

Breakfast anyone?

Yes please!

Hawian breakfast - would that include exotic fruits? Somehow bacon and eggs doesn't seem right.

I think it would have bacon eggs and exotic fruits.

And I'll have some, too, please!

Thanks! Mine seems to be bacon, eggs and exotic fruit juice. Not on the same plate, as it would be too wet and would taste funny.

Yesterday for breakfast, I used the pilsbury uncooked croissant stuff, and stuffed them with bacon and cheese before baking - absolutely incredibly moreish! Anyone like some!

(do you like my Epiphany name?)

Oh yes, virtual bacon-n-cheese croissant over here, thank you very much (I am currently hanging out here, plus in Slimming World and 30 Day Shred threads, must remember where I am at any given time or I could cause a riot talking about croissants in the wrong place).

I had two days of food weirdness with the in-laws after Christmas. 'Proper' roast was okay, except they put the peas out with a teaspoon to serve them. The day before though they did leftover turkey, mash, veg and gravy. Fair enough, except they do this WEIRD thing where they plate up mash, veg AND GRAVY and then leave you to help yourself to meat. It's like they want the gravy to go cold. Very odd.

Was offered some Baileys, but warned it was past its use-by date, did it actually go of. Yes, I said, it does - we established that in this very house a few years ago. I didn't ask how/why another bottle of Baileys has been allowed to go off in the meantime, without being offered tome. I guess it's because it's ages since we were there for Christmas and they didn't think to offer it at any other time of year. THEN I found some Advocaat and was going to go all retro with a snowball, but they had no ice.

It's no good, my cat requires attention, he is standing in front of the monitor. Again. Later ...

Thankyou Amber - the Aspidistra does indeed look most splendid just there.

Hawaiian carrots? And there was me getting Mellors to freight in emergency supplies...

That's better!

Tea anyone? There's plenty more where this came from...

I went back to sleep! Suppose I needed it.

Hurrah for the absence of turkey!

Phew, just finished an epic bit of work for churches.

You lot are just trying to wind me up with the Aspidistra, aren't you?
I'll have the Hawaiian fruit platter for breakfast, saving calories for the luau tonight.

Wind you up with the aspidistra? I've no idea what you mean

Is it a special aspidistra? Does it have powers?

Should I go stand behind JM and the flame thrower until I know for sure?