Realised this year how much my 19 year old just doesn't know

[davidssdt]

Bit of a random one. My eldest is 19 and it's only this year I've properly clocked how much genuinely useful "adult life" stuff just never gets covered in school - not because teachers don't try, but probably more that there's never actually time carved out for it.
I had to sit down and explain what a mortgage actually is and why an unpaid phone bill can damage your credit file for years, because none of that had ever come up in school. Also had the apprenticeship vs uni conversation recently and realised there's no real structured way for them to weigh that up - it's basically left to them and whoever they last spoke to.
So for full disclosure, I'm actually building something around this (a curriculum site for 16-25s) but not naming it here as I don't want this to read as a plug. I'm genuinely just curious what other parents experience has been around this. What's the thing your teenager had absolutely no clue about until they had to learn the hard way?

Perhaps less time on learning Shakespeare and more time on learning about managing money would be a step forward and of much more practical value to many.

I've used SOHCAHTOA thousands of times. A lot more than I've used my understanding of mortgages. More importantly, though I wasn't taught about mortgages by anyone, the algebra I learnt in maths at school was all I needed to work it out for myself.

I'm sceptical.
I doubt that most primary aged children know about all of those things. Most young people would pick them up on a need to know basis.

You have AI now.
That can teach you all you need about mortgages.
No one taught me when we bought our first house in 1990. I picked up lots of literature from banks and educated myself about all the different products.

So much of this is covered in school through PDP (personal development program) or whatever each school calls it. The issue is kids do not engage. They think they either know it all or can look it up on the internet when they need it. I have been a sixth form form tutor for years and we cover all of this. Including apprenticeship vs university, yet no matter how much we say or show getting an apprenticeship is soooooo hard, much harder than uni, it is a fall back for those who don’t want to make a decision. ‘I’ll get an apprenticeship’. My y13 this year asked me for some advice on managing money at uni (at the end of the academic year just before they left). We looked at the set of lessons presented previously. They just did not take it in at the time as it wasn’t an immediate issue for them. I am not saying this to be critical of young people at all, it is just they operate differently to how we did and think they can get information immediately when they need it. I have experienced this as a parent too and say to anyone who thinks it is easy to ‘educate’ your own that each young person is different and as a teacher and parent I would be judged as a failure by many on this thread.

Why are parents not explaining financial health and having those conversations- and from a young age? That should be your responsibility. I would like to see school teach kids how to study for exams personally- as this is done in private schools but public schools don’t help them then they get dumped into exams and expected to know how to organise the information. Financial literacy, cooking, and generally being reasonable is home life domain.

How to make a doctor’s appointment and then advocate for yourself. Our GP insists this is done by the patient from age 16. Young people can be under confident with navigating these systems, especially where mental or sexual health is concerned.

Safe travel abroad, including the need for 6 months on your passport, travel insurance and GHIC card, vaccinations.

I’d be massively surprised if they’ve not been told these things in PSHE lessons, but there’s so much to cover that it won’t be retained.

When I was at school, I learned how to use a slide rule. I also learned how to change a plug. I do not need those skills now, which were once considered essential.
I never touched a computer until I was at work, many years later. Having had no lessons at school on this, I was somehow fine.
I found out about mortgages by contacting a building society.
My point is this; education is to develop cognitive abilities. If you can read and write and work your way through instructions, discern what is useful and what is not and you'll be fine.
Teach children in school that passports have an expiry date? When you are an adult it's surely possible to check that for yourself.
There's a whole internet full of information and advice.
If you want schools to just become hours of instructions for issues in adult life which may well change before they are adults, that is a grave mistake.

When I was at school, you made an appointment by ringing the surgery. Now you go online and fill in the boxes. There was no such thing as the internet when I was at school. It's pointless "teaching" information which may soon be out of date.
Instead, teach them to navigate information, listen, answer questions and work out solutions. They'll do this in every lesson already.

This is definitely a parents job. Social skills need to be taught at home along with manners, decency and respect

What are the qualifications or experience of whoever will be wtiting the info?

But the information’s all public. You and your son, once taught to read and think by schools, can just look it up. This all practical, life-admin. stuff. It’s not academic stuff.

Yes, I didn't know anything about student loans, but my son got all the information and applied before he went to university. It's all available.

I agree. Finding time and modern life can make this hard.

When I was doing my masters in special education, I had to do a study that included reading research about how children learn at home. There was an old study about what younger children in large families picked up from their older siblings and parents around the dinner table. There were things like attitudes towards bosses, financial decisions, friendship rules.

It might be the same when everyone was sitting around one TV and making comments (like the Royle family used to). Children get to learn social rules from what they hear.

I went to school in the 70s and we certainly did not get taught life skills. I knew enough to handle leaving home at 21 and leaving the country for a job abroad just a year later. I must have learned that at home.

Judging by the number of mumsnetters who won't answer the door or use the telephone for its original intended purpose I worry about the younger generation not learning these soft communication skills if their parents won't use them.

We can hide behind screens for most things, but there will be occasions where you will need to answer the phone to a private number - healthcare professionals, for example.

Absolutely this.

There is enough time. If financial knowledge was baked into the curriculum, then it would just be part of schooling.

Other countries manage btw. I live in a country where my 11yo just had an exam about exactly that. Pay-day loans, mortgages, ways to make money (job, business ownership, investing), interest rates etc. Dc found it really interesting and we had great conversations around it.
And we all know not every parent knows about this stuff and cant manage their own finances. So how could they teach this stuff to their children? Or don't children born to these parents deserve to understand how money works? Maybe not according to you.

What happens when they don't/can't??

I agree. There needs to be more "real life", as you say "baked" into the curriculum. I despair when I see the way that compound interest is "taught" - it's all algebra so immediately beyond the reach of pupils who aren't good at Maths - it's "Just another equation" rather than being taught in real life scenarios. There's so much time wasted in schools, not just on things that most pupils will never need, but also time wasted in other ways. We desperately need a massive reform of the entire system as schools are still based around several decades ago and not for the future needs.

You could say the same about a lot of stuff that IS taught in schools. Now mostly available at the click of a mouse, so why waste time in schools teaching it, especially things that the majority will never need.

Not my point, if you've read my posts.

School never claimed to cover ‘useful life knowledge’… that’s always been for parents to do. School educates them in a broad curriculum with the end goal being employment.

Although in answer to your question Op, some things I could have done with knowing:

1. Employment rights
2. Maternity and paternity leave (most of not fully paid which many don’t realise!)
3. Stain removal
4. How to and what to file away for future. I’m going to sit down when my child is 18 and create a folder for them for this stuff.

But I don't think it does anymore, certainly not for the modern workforce/jobs of the future. We should be teaching skills not facts.