How can I deal with being misdiagnosed by my psychologist?

[Gymnastxo96]

Back in August of 2025 I did phycological testing at a phycologist that I go to and they said my full IQ was 76 which I don’t understand because I type just fine and have good grammar and could type full sentences. Many people say you sure your IQ is 76 because I type just fine and have good grammer and can communicate well. And my adaptive behavior score was 57 which is pretty low. Why would they misinterpret that too? Why would they misinterpret the results and think I don’t understand medical decisions and they recommend medical guardianship. Why would they misinterpret my results? Now people think I am mentally challenged because of this. Are they wrong for misinterpreting the results to make me worse then I seem? Keep in mind I do have high functioning autism so do you think my autism played a role in how I did in the IQ test or you think I was completely misdiagnosed and it could be something else?

No-one is saying OP can’t/shouldn’t have a child just because she isn’t in a stable relationship. There is far, far more context than that. To imply that is what people are saying is very simplistic.

Decisions about contraception are made for some women in England when they are judged to lack capacity to make the decision themselves. Either ‘just’ via the best interests process, via someone having personal welfare deputyship awarded by the court of protection, or via the CoP ruling on a one-off specific issue.

In the OP’s case, medical guardianship has been given to OP’s DM.

And if those “goals and dreams” are not realistic?

It's not simply about stable relationships and finances and you know it. You also know who gets to decide and why, and if you don't, it's easy enough to look up. It's not about goals and dreams. It's not the X Factor. It's a legal and medical process. Campaign to change it if you feel it's not working/unethical, but OP is in the system and can engage with it at any point in order to understand, question or alter her situation if that's what she wants to do. But surely you know that for some people it's not a matter of a couple of years of support to transform them from someone incapable of parenting a child into someone who truly is capable. If you act like it's pure oppression of people's dreams, it's hard to take seriously.

Her relationship status is not why this is happening (although she keeps changing her mind about what that status is).

Do you agree the OP is vulnerable and clearly has learning difficulties? I suggested she engage with any support offered. If she does that, maybe she WILL one day be able to accomplish what she wants.

Stamping her foot because apparently it’s everyone else that’s wrong is an indicator that she isn’t mature at the moment. At 30, I would expect someone to be able to make a sensible decision about something that major.

Or does her wish to have a baby go above all else. Even if the child is taken away from her? Even if the child has similar issues?

You put it better than me!

And a 32yo man should not be having sex with someone whose learning difficulties make her more like a 10-13 yo.

I have had test results that I couldn’t believe were right.
Probably because they were wrong

When people say “Do you know better than a medically trained person”
My answer is “When it comes to my body, definitely”

I wonder if some of the issues that Gymnastxo96 faces are because she has never been allowed to work things out for herself or shown how to work things out. Or been encouraged or pushed to try new things or shown how to budget, how to live independently etc

If you treat someone like a child then if they act like a child what do you expect.

My own DS I was told would never be able to live independently, hold down a job and be doubly incontinent for his whole life

According to some on here I should have accepted what I was being told

DS was 8 years old at the time and perfectly capable of going to the toilet on his own. He was also very bright.
Dyslexia, ADHD (both diagnosed post 17) and not being able to read. Meant he failed everything. Took me 1+ hours per day everyday for 2 years to get him to be able to read.
Ds now works as a manager with staff under him. He is learning Mandarin and has his own business.

Whilst I do see some lack of awareness in Gymnastxo96 I think with some therapy and work to discuss differing scenarios and learning what to look out for and how to handle these things would make the world of difference.

These are things Gymnastxo96 parents should have got for her long before now
I don’t see any help or encouragement being given by them to teach her anything.

I think a lot of people who are ND and some NT’s would end up like Gymnastxo96 if they had the same upbringing

I do think though Gymnastxo96 you have more immediate problems
The fact your mother wants to put you under a guardianship.
Yet most of your posts refer to getting a man/boyfriends and who will want you. It makes you sound like a schoolgirl and you are just giving your mother more evidence that as a 30year old woman you aren’t grown up enough to look after yourself

I would start by getting yourself therapy/ help to navigate your autism. Have you been tested for ADHD as well, as acting younger than your years is a very common sign of ADHD
If you do have adhd then this aspect could be controlled by medication.

I would also do my research on psychologists who can retest you. Don’t inform your mother or anyone of this as you want a truly independent test. Don’t tell the psychologist about your previous diagnosis or why you are there
I would be getting your own private health cover to cover the costs. (Presumably you pay for health cover through your job that is independent of your parents)

If it does come out the same or similar or even if it comes out as normal range I would still ask about therapy or help to improve some aspects of how you are being perceived

I would be also looking to live more independently

Maybe ask both your parents to get tested for autism and adhd, IQ etc
It would be interesting to see the results
as these things are genetic and I suspect that one or both of your parents are on the spectrum.
(My money is on your mother)

No I’m saying I don’t think my mental age matches my own age. It’s not fair for you to assume my mental age is much younger because that’s a misconception and I can date who ever I want.

That it not true at all. I am able to consent to sex and my therapist and doctors say I can date who ever I want so you clearly don’t understand at all. It’s not fair! I don’t want any assumptions. I’m an adult. What are your thoughts? And how do I change my mental age?

I might be bipolar 2 as well. Do you think so based on what I write?

So legally if someone physically under 14 has sex its assult becauae a 13 year old doesnt have capacity to agree to sex. So if mentally you act younger, coupled with your scoring theres a concern youre vulnerable.

If youve passed a sexual competency assessment you can of course have sex with whomever you want. But sex and intimacy arent the same. Some men use intimacy as a lure to get sex from women (any woman regardless of capacity) to get sex.

There is a concern from posters these men are lying to you, promising you a future they dont want with you because youre easily convinced to have sex with them.

Theres also an assumption from us people generally make futures with someone whos intellectually and emotionally on equal or similar footing to them. Someone with an IQ or 100+, wanting to be with someone with your cognitive and intellectual difficulties seems disingenuous. That doesnt mean they all are but look at your BF, hes having sex with you while making excuses to not be with you. Things youd struggle to change, and shouldnt have to either.

Youve said you dont want to be with someone with autism and a similar IQ to you? Why is that?

Have you asked yourself if you dont want to date someone like you why someone with more cognitive and social skills than you would want to date you?

You can date who you like, but if you want to have a family you need to think about how you manage independence and pick a good partner and someone unwilling to commit isnt the right one

You need a psychiatrist to diagnose bipolar, you wouldnt know that by writing online.

Classic! Well I'm sure @FairKoala will diagnose you based on what you write and prescribe therapy (completely missing the fact you already have therapy) and discussing different scenarios so you'll be right as rain in no time, managing your own business and teaching your baby to speak Mandarin. Honestly, OP, no one here can diagnose you and you already have a therapist and doctors, and can get others if you need more professional opinions. Mumsnet can't do that.

Yeah but I have needs too and it’s perfectly legal for me to have sex with a typical adult as I have a high sex drive so it upsets me that you say they could go to jail for having sex with me when it’s not true at all just because I have a younger mentality doesn’t take away my right to have sex with who ever I chose. What are your thoughts? I am definitely able to consent to sex

I work part time at a grocery store and the guy I’m dating probably doesn’t see a future with me because of my mental age and autism so I’m screwed! And some people on here say a guy shouldn’t have sex with me because of their mental age which isn’t true. Me and the guy I am dating do relationship type things like go out to dinner and go out places

You are able to consent to a certain extent, yes, but is it informed consent? Do you feel that you know where they are in the relationship, whether they see it as one at all? Do they know what you think and want? Do you get to say no when you don't want to? No strings sex is fine, if both people know this what it is.

Yeah but I have needs too and it’s perfectly legal for me to have sex with a typical adult as I have a high sex drive so it upsets me that you say they could go to jail for having sex with me when it’s not true at all just because I have a younger mentality doesn’t take away my right to have sex with who ever I chose. What are your thoughts? I am definitely able to consent to sex

What job do you do @Gymnastxo96 and is it full time?

Noone on this thread has said that under no circumstances should you ever have a child. We don't know you. What people are saying, I think correctly, is that at the moment you aren't showing awareness of all that is involved in being a parent and it's a concern. You should be thinking of ways to achieve more independence for yourself before becoming responsible for a vulnerable baby, surely.

ETA sorry, just saw that you answered my question a few posts ago.

I'm afraid I am judging a neurological typical 32 year old man who would have sex with you, as it seems that he may well be taking advantage of you.

OP works part time - it’s very unlikely she has health insurance through this job with enough cover to get retested without significant out of pocket costs.

It’s possible that if she has a formal diagnosis re lack of capacity that she is getting some form of disability allowance / Medicare.

Also a lot of testing for conditions like ADHD are not covered by insurance at all.

I’m in the US with fantastic insurance and they still would not cover ADHD testing for DD.

We ended up paying $650 for the testing and consultations. Luckily the ADHD meds are covered by our insurance but a lot of people aren’t as lucky and are paying over $500 a month for medication.

OP - I agree with this poster that a second opinion and retesting might be beneficial.

Do you know what the situation is with your health insurance and what your co-pays would be? Do you have savings you can use to pay for independent testing?

I’m not “assuming” your mental age is younger.

You’ve repeatedly said your mental age ISN’T younger than your actual age AND also repeatedly said that your mental age IS younger than your actual age so I was trying to clarify what you actually believe to be the case…

I’m still not sure as since you posted this you’ve said both things again.

I didnt say they would go to prison. I said children under 14 cant consent to sex, even if they say they did consent - they cant. Its a capacity thing. Its not about their physical body but their emotional development.

Youve said both that you present younger and that you don't. At you keep talking about your needs and wants in a way that presents as immature. Which may be unfair we dont know you IRL.

So there are people on here, concerned because of your autism and your IQ is 72 and you present emotionally immature that the sort of men attracted to that are predatory.

You can have sex with whoever you like. But you're saying you want a partner and a family. And a man who says you are NOT mature enough to commit to but you are mature enough to have sex with sounds potentially predatory.

And if youre saying you wouldnt want to date someone whos also ND with a similar IQ why is that? What are your thoughts?

Many people say you sure your IQ is 76 because I type just fine and have good grammer and can communicate well.

How I’m not telling them my personal business. Some people can figure out that I am autistic and want nothing to do with me.

Why because of my autism she has to decide not me

The above are all passable and understandable sentences, but when you’re skim reading and expecting proper grammar, then they jar and I needed a second read through to absorb them as they’re not properly written.

I wouldn’t have commented at all as this is a forum where informal, conversational posts are fine - except the OP specifically claims she has good “grammer” and communicates well, which is objectively not true based on her posts here and the example sentences above.

You clearly don’t want to take anything on board. Nobody said he will go to jail, just that a typical man who dates a woman with a much younger emotional or intellectual age is suspect.

And you don’t have ‘needs’ - you have wants. If you are serious about putting your life together then engage with any help and prioritise getting your life together before you try to bring a baby into it.

If you choose to ignore this, just try to think how you would feel if you gave birth and the baby was taken away from you because you don’t have capacity to care for it?