Page 27 | That annoying guest - what is their christmas crime?

MrsWhites · 2025-12-14T13:54:15+00:00

So everyone has a guest or someone in the family if you don’t host who will do something seemingly innocent that will piss everyone off? Who is yours and why? I’ll go first - My sister because she uses all the gravy and doesn’t get off her arse to go and make more! No matter how much gravy we put out she will always use most of it! It’s got to the point now where we put the gravy boars furthest away from her so everyone else gets a go first!

ednaclouda · 18/12/2025 13:40

JobstacleCourse · 15/12/2025 19:53

DSS who doesn’t shower for an entire 4 day stay. Also sulks if he is asked to help with dishwasher or tidy up. He is in his 30’s.

DSS gets his phone ‘lost’ for the entirety of his visit or loudly sniffed at regularly this should work. Arsewipe if he is 30

ednaclouda · 18/12/2025 13:52

TheDenimPoet · 15/12/2025 16:44

My dad's sister will consistently (not just at Christmas) tell people what they "should" have done, instead of what they "did" do. Whether that's in person, or on social media, there's always an opinion about what you've done wrong, and should have done better. It sounds mild when compared to some, but it's worn me down over the past 4 decades!

My stepson is also a pain when he comes round - as he will pick up on every single thing my grandparents say wrong. They're in their 80s, and sometimes use the wrong words, things we're no longer allowed to say etc. Let me be clear, they're lovely, they would never offend someone intentionally, they're just saying things they were brought up saying. I know this sounds like the typical "but I have black friends" statement, but there are people in our family from all walks of life, all colours, all sexualities, disabilities etc, and my grandparents have always treated them the same - as of course they should. It's just the words they use sometimes. Stepson will correct them and explain why, but in a very nasty, condescending way, as if he knows best. Neither of their memories are particularly great anymore, so they will never remember what they've been told anyway. I feel like if they were 20 years younger they'd have actually taken it on board, but their confusion is just too great now.

@TheDenimPoet dear darling Stepson you will NOT be rude to my elderly parents and enough with that attitude or out you go Sonny

Milkbloo · 18/12/2025 14:09

The one who decides to not use her bathroom because she prefers my mirror, and plonks her products on my shelf and leaves her make up bag by my sink. Honestly. With an announcement that she’s doing this, not a polite request. I mean, honestly. She also walked about in my room and the kitchen topless after a shower, with a towel just around her waist, as if she was a bloke. I didn’t need that much boobage view, I just didn’t.

Parry5timesbeforedeath · 18/12/2025 14:14

sprigatito · 18/12/2025 13:31

Is bread sauce…lumpy? What is its texture? I’ve never had it and am very tempted to have a go at making it, but I don’t think I understand it very well

Mine has the texture of porridge. Which does not sound good tbh. But it is.

RessicaJabbit · 18/12/2025 14:19

ednaclouda · 18/12/2025 13:40

DSS gets his phone ‘lost’ for the entirety of his visit or loudly sniffed at regularly this should work. Arsewipe if he is 30

Show quote history

Better still, don't even invite the lazy, selfish soap dodger.

CraftyGin · 18/12/2025 14:21

Parry5timesbeforedeath · 18/12/2025 14:14

Mine has the texture of porridge. Which does not sound good tbh. But it is.

Show quote history

Mine is more like tapioca. I did the breadcrumbs in the NutriBullet, so much finer than a food processor or grater.

ednaclouda · 18/12/2025 14:25

@asco Good on yer him speaking to you like that I would also say loudly Yes Grayham you CAN do the washing up

Mothership4two · 18/12/2025 18:10

I have a friend like that @Milkbloo . She and her DH came once to get ready for a party so we could all go together. She turned into guestzilla - she had us running around after her while we all were getting ready and she constantly kept coming into our bedroom - I really wanted to tell her to f off. Then she came in and asked where I sat to put on my make up, puzzled I said well at my dressing table as it's the best mirror/light. She promptly sat there to do her make up. So Dh and I ended up together in our bathroom so he could get changed and I could put my make up on. Her DH was finding our annoyance amusing (don't think her behaviour was a new thing). As we left the house I picked up her bag, held it out to her saying 'oh don't forget this' she promptly turned her back on me and walking off saying over her shoulder 'oh yes, could you bring it for me?' (WTF?). I got in the car and chucked it at her. We are still friends but we would never have her back to stay.

Andylion · 18/12/2025 18:30

AInightingale · 15/12/2025 08:50

Love Garron Noone though he's a bit extra-sweary in this one. (1) An Irish person invites you over for Christmas - YouTube. So true.

I don’t know why he appeared on my insta feed a couple of weeks ago, but I fuckin’ love this guy!

PigletJohn · 19/12/2025 08:03

sprigatito · 18/12/2025 13:31

Is bread sauce…lumpy? What is its texture? I’ve never had it and am very tempted to have a go at making it, but I don’t think I understand it very well

No, it is basically hot milk, thickened with breadcrumbs and simmered. It does not contain flour.

The milk is previously flavoured with onion, cloves, nutmeg, pepper, salt, and, just befire serving, improved with butter or cream. It thickens as you simmer it, and again when any left over is chilled for future use. An iron simmering ring us helpful to cook it slowly.

I also have it in cold turkey sandwiches, and occasionally hot with sausages, though it does take a long time.

At this time if year you can buy it readymade in tubs, which are not bad, but you can improve them with extra butter or cream and spices.

You may also see dried packets of powder, which are not much good.

Restlesslimbs54 · 19/12/2025 09:39

PigletJohn · 19/12/2025 08:03

No, it is basically hot milk, thickened with breadcrumbs and simmered. It does not contain flour.

The milk is previously flavoured with onion, cloves, nutmeg, pepper, salt, and, just befire serving, improved with butter or cream. It thickens as you simmer it, and again when any left over is chilled for future use. An iron simmering ring us helpful to cook it slowly.

I also have it in cold turkey sandwiches, and occasionally hot with sausages, though it does take a long time.

At this time if year you can buy it readymade in tubs, which are not bad, but you can improve them with extra butter or cream and spices.

You may also see dried packets of powder, which are not much good.

Show quote history

{swoons at discovery that not only is PigletJohn an expert at DIY, he also knows his way around the kitchen}

PigletJohn · 19/12/2025 12:38

@restlesslimbs54

All men can cook. They only pretend not to so that women will do it.

sprigatito · 19/12/2025 12:43

PigletJohn · 19/12/2025 08:03

No, it is basically hot milk, thickened with breadcrumbs and simmered. It does not contain flour.

The milk is previously flavoured with onion, cloves, nutmeg, pepper, salt, and, just befire serving, improved with butter or cream. It thickens as you simmer it, and again when any left over is chilled for future use. An iron simmering ring us helpful to cook it slowly.

I also have it in cold turkey sandwiches, and occasionally hot with sausages, though it does take a long time.

At this time if year you can buy it readymade in tubs, which are not bad, but you can improve them with extra butter or cream and spices.

You may also see dried packets of powder, which are not much good.

Show quote history

Thank you! I’m going to have a go at it this year. It sounds delicious, and if nothing else it’ll be a talking point

IainTorontoNSW · 19/12/2025 17:52

Gravy is a crime.
Dubious crap added to meals.

Was ALWAYS used in my college days by the chefs/cooks to hide some food atrocity from a petty, cost-cutting management.
Gravy and copious mashed potatoes were used to smother everything.

Now 70yo ... last had gravy before my sixteenth birthday.

I see myself as a recovering victim of gravy mismanagement. 😕

sprigatito · 19/12/2025 17:58

IainTorontoNSW · 19/12/2025 17:52

Gravy is a crime.
Dubious crap added to meals.

Was ALWAYS used in my college days by the chefs/cooks to hide some food atrocity from a petty, cost-cutting management.
Gravy and copious mashed potatoes were used to smother everything.

Now 70yo ... last had gravy before my sixteenth birthday.

I see myself as a recovering victim of gravy mismanagement. 😕

You and I are very different people 😆

once1caughtafishalive · 19/12/2025 21:25

crackofdoom · 17/12/2025 08:53

"Helpful" relatives who insist on doing the washing up and drying up (we are a proud slattern household and just leave the dishes in the drainer to dry normally) and then pile all the clean stuff up in the middle of the only empty worktop because they "don't know where everything lives".

This is super helpful in my eyes! Does the shitty job of the washing up and then has the grace to not put it back in the wrong place. Its only a quick job from there!

Mothership4two · 20/12/2025 06:24

Same here @sprigatito . We are very much a gravy household and I have to keep my beady eye out to make sure everyone gets a fair share or some greedy bugger will go first and snaffle most of it.

I think there's gravy and there's gravy. It can be mediocre if no-one puts much care into making it. Mine is delicious (if I say so myself!). It's one of the best bits of the meal.

crackofdoom · 20/12/2025 10:28

once1caughtafishalive · 19/12/2025 21:25

This is super helpful in my eyes! Does the shitty job of the washing up and then has the grace to not put it back in the wrong place. Its only a quick job from there!

Show quote history

Noooo....not when you're trying to prepare tea, and there's a big pile of stuff slapped in the middle of your preparation space!

And you specifically said "Leave things in the drainer, it's what we do in this house" (because there isn't enough cupboard space)!

once1caughtafishalive · 20/12/2025 11:16

Ah well that's fair enough!! Definitely the wrong time to be cluttering up the sides whilst you're preparing food!

In fact, only one person in the kitchen at a time should be law, unless someone has been otherwise invited in

Vroomfondleswaistcoat · 20/12/2025 11:23

I don't put cloves in my bread sauce because I don't like them (so shoot me!) but everything else goes in. Sparing hand with the nutmeg if you don't want it to taste like soap though. And no need to 'breadcrumb', you can beat it hard with a wooden spoon and it breaks up. Loads of cream and butter and job's a good 'un.

SunnieShine · 20/12/2025 11:39

twilightcafe · 14/12/2025 15:56

Breathing. In my house.

You need to put a stop to that. 😁

FruitPoppet · 20/12/2025 12:02

The members of my family who don't put enough effort into lunch but still enjoy everyone else's food!

We have a huge family so everyone brings a part of Xmas lunch, so no one is stuck cooking all day and everyone puts lots of effort into their one thing. We always end up with epic cauliflower cheese, multiple types of stuffing, quality meats etc. it's all very decadent and wonderful. We decide months in advance who's going to make what, everyone gets to choose and negotiate.

We delegate three people to three separate desserts, so there is plenty. I always choose to make a dessert because I love baking. Except the last two years the other dessert bringers have just not come through with decent puddings and my dessert has been the only homemade one.

If you don't want to make a pudding, don't say you will! Or at least get a not basic range pud, it's Christmas after all!

Vodkamartini3olives · 20/12/2025 12:30

Dollymylove · 14/12/2025 18:00

Which way, in your opinion, is the correct way round for the bog roll?

Edited

Show quote history

Just throwing my two cents in. Beard not mullett.

twilightcafe · 20/12/2025 12:46

FruitPoppet · 20/12/2025 12:02

The members of my family who don't put enough effort into lunch but still enjoy everyone else's food!

We have a huge family so everyone brings a part of Xmas lunch, so no one is stuck cooking all day and everyone puts lots of effort into their one thing. We always end up with epic cauliflower cheese, multiple types of stuffing, quality meats etc. it's all very decadent and wonderful. We decide months in advance who's going to make what, everyone gets to choose and negotiate.

We delegate three people to three separate desserts, so there is plenty. I always choose to make a dessert because I love baking. Except the last two years the other dessert bringers have just not come through with decent puddings and my dessert has been the only homemade one.

If you don't want to make a pudding, don't say you will! Or at least get a not basic range pud, it's Christmas after all!

If you know what these people are like, why rely on them?

shellyleppard · 21/12/2025 08:10

@RememberHowYouMadeMeCrazy can you please please please send photos??? I love your children for being so bloody honest!! Have a very happy Christmas 🎁 ⛄ 🎄