I think my cat stole someone's Sunday lunch

[Duckingella]

Just that really

My cat has just turned up on my patio with a small roasted chicken in his greedy mouth.

He has form for sneaking into neighbours houses through doors and we windows.

I can't really go knocking on doors to ask if anyone is moving missing their dinner

Mortified doesn't cover it

Your Dad is horrible

We had an evil twat cat years ago. He would Nick the Sunday dinner from under my nose. Once stole the ham and hid under the bed growling at us. We sadly had to re home him as he terrorised our original cat and nearly killed him. The couple who took him said he was the spit of their old cat. I warned them about his thieving tendancies, “oh just like Bobby. We had to put baby locks in all the cupboards and fridge because he’d open the door and steal everything.”
Our current cat stole a huge chunk of Wensleydale out of my shopping bag. He was under the table fending off the dogs.

My cat brought me a mouse last night. Took us (me and the cat) and hour to catch him. The cat had the time of his life, I was so stressed out. But managed to catch and take the poor mouse out. Went to bed at 2am.

A dog one - my daughter left a bowl of strawberries and cream on the floor while she went to get a spoon. When she came back every speck of cream had disappeared and dog was sat there looking all innocent. Another time when he was a pup used to raid the dustbin bag in his mad half hour. Saw him running around the garden with a used mini pad in his mouth, full of joy 🤢. Also ate a pair of daughters used knickers from wash bin. He loved my daughter 😕

My cat used to take socks and knickers round to the neighbours house and leave them in either his garden or kitchen (if window open).She started doing it when her kittens were too big to carry anymore.

The funny thing was, the male neighbour once knocked on the door and asked us to confirm to his live-out girlfriend that it was in fact the cat stealing my knickers and taking them to his house and not another women. The whole thing was mortifying really. One time it was a pair of rather nice black knickers m, I used to find a pile of underwear on my doorstep every couple of weeks!

My cat came home on three separate occasions with enormous (cooked) roast chicken breasts. I have no idea where he got them from, but he always looked very pleased with himself. I imagined someone was baffled as to why their chicken dinners kept disappearing...

Mums cat was caught eating a near neighbours defrosting frozen chicken …eeek

They must have taken it well, as Mum didn’t buy them a replacement chicken

ds ddog stole a lady's shoe from the beach while she was barefoot paddling,
she saw the funny side

That’s why I don’t like cat owners. People on here describing how their cats have killed their neighbours children’s hamsters, pet/exotic birds, ripped the heads off a whole litter of guinea pigs, all like they’re hilariously funny anecdotes. It’s NOT kinder to have someone wonder what on earth has ever happened to a beloved pet, and perhaps spend months looking out for it, than have the balls to confess your pet entered their property and killed it. Some of the food ones are funny, but a lot won’t be if you’re in that situation. Actually shook my head at the pp who said their cat went out 4 times in the space of 30 minutes on Xmas day, coming back each time with an assortment of steaming hot food for a Xmas dinner, including the turkey. Why the fuck wouldn’t you think ‘that’s someone’s Xmas dinner my pets just ruined, perhaps I’d better keep it in for a little bit’.

Our last cat brought in a few rats when the neighbours were having an extension put in, which had obviously disturbed the local rat population.

He was thwarted by my FIL who saw him trying to drag a monster rat through the cat flap. I mean, it was mutant sized.

FIL intervened, the rat bit FIL on the hand and disappeared into the bowels of the house never to be seen again. The cat went out and brought another TWO rats back in quick succession who also disappeared into the house.

FIL had to go to A&E for a tetanus jab and even now never lets us forget how he suffered.

Cat of course remained unrepentant.

Years ago when my DM was a teenager her part-Siamese cat broke into her rather posh neighbour’s house and ate every bit of fish from the top of the canapés she had expertly prepared for a Red Cross buffet she was giving for around 30 guests.

You wouldn’t have known at first glance as he’d picked his way delicately across a massive table and eaten every tiny bit of smoked salmon, prawn, fish pate etc from loads of canapés without disturbing anything else, and then gone into her bedroom for a sleep on her nightie.

she was very good humoured about it 😱

Ddog had form for escaping when he was younger (6ft fence was no issue) whilst he wasn't technically stealing we found out he was begging for (and getting) bacon/sausage baps from our neighbour's son. Unfortunately injury, age and resulting eye wateringly expensive surgery means his escaping days are long over. Dcat was too lazy to leave the garden

I’m dying at some of these 😂 mine is indoor and is an angel in comparison. She just brings me her toys. The only human food she’s ever tried to steal is rum cake.

Yep, that's what I meant.

I had cats until recently. We specifically got cats because we wanted them to be mousers (we're rural; I do believe it's the best option as poison is more cruel - and not very reliable - and the smell of a cat deters rodents). I'm not sentimental about it. And I would find the food ones quite funny if it was my food - I'd be mortified (though amused) if it was someone else's, and of course I'd keep them in if I knew they were doing it.

But it's not at all funny to boast about not telling someone their pet has died.

My cat brought home a floral gardening glove one day and left it outside the back door. Layer that day she brought the matching one. A few days later she brought another pair of gloves, one at a time. I never found out which shed or garden she stole them from.

When my dog was a wee thing, she disappeared off into the woods on a walk. Returned with a very nice looking scone, complete with jam and clotted cream, looking pleased as punch. Little menace had obviously interrupted someone's lovely afternoon tea picnic. Still feel a little guilty about it to this day!

Go cat! It's all par for the course

My cat used to steal muller fruit corners, I'm guessing from a neighbour's bin. He would carry them back home with his nose in the small triangle and his jaw in the big triangle. He looked like a robot cat...terrifying as he entered his cat flap.

I'm amazed that, compared to dogs, these creatures are so quiet. So still. So dignified. Yet they create chaos. Such skills

We had 8 rashers of raw bacon once.

Oh my goodness. That one helluva prize.

My first cat was an absolute nymphomaniac. I once saw her on my neighbour's lawn, 'at it' with a tomcat, with a straight-line queue of toms sitting there patiently waiting their turn! 😂Never seen anything like it before or since.

She had a thing for my laciest underwear & would steal it off the airer. Nothing else appealed to her. I suppose that habit fitted in with the rest of her personality.

Wish mine would do this.
I just get half eaten pigeons , rats and other dead creatures in...
My youngest likes to just bring in leaves.

My cat came home with a size 38D bra once

I've just been to the pub without the kids (six months and 2.5 years) and thought my day had peaked. I was wrong.