I think my cat stole someone's Sunday lunch

[Duckingella]

Just that really

My cat has just turned up on my patio with a small roasted chicken in his greedy mouth.

He has form for sneaking into neighbours houses through doors and we windows.

I can't really go knocking on doors to ask if anyone is moving missing their dinner

Mortified doesn't cover it

My cat used to filch the meat from my DH's sandwiches.

Brilliant! 🤩

CantFindMyMarbles
That is brilliant 🤩! Love it! So flipping true, though 😂!

Our old cat did this once 😄

Dd1 messaged me at work to say next doors cat had appeared on our door step with a whole cooked chicken breast in his mouth, it was a sunny day so we assumed he'd pinched Somebody's lunch 😂😂

My ginger cat walked over a beautiful charcuterie board and stood on it to eat almost an entire cheesecake one Christmas while we were in another room

One of my Siamese cats loves croissants. She has been known (more than once) to rip open a pack from the supermarket and eat part of every one inside. She is the aforementioned old lady, so DH shares any croissants he has with her.

Our Irish setter (long ago in the 60s when dogs used to be allowed out to roam in the streets) stole and presented to us: 1. a bag of porridge oats from the corner grocer; 2. the Sunday roast leg of lamb from one of the neighbours' houses in our street and 3. a greyhound puppy from a breeder's high-fenced enclosure. The puppy he nudged into the sitting room where the family were after dinner. We think he was miffed because we had rescued another dog that week and so he was thinking 'You want another dog? Well, here's one that I've chosen for you, OK?'. My father made inquiries and returned the puppy; the breeder had no idea how our dog had achieved the feat of getting in – and then out again with the puppy, who was completely uninjured. After that my father installed a seven-foot fence to stop the dog getting out and roaming. Dog watched as the fence was constructed, then as soon as it was finished, jumped over it with ease. Another layer had to be added to make it all secure. Dog was adored and lived mainly inside with us, but he did like to go on expeditions, as we called it.

My cat is not a chicken rustler. Nope. He brings home lacy thongs, bras and negligees. My OH said I should take them back. Take them back to where though??? I am NOT hawking them around the neighbourhood. Nobody would believe that Edgar(black longhaired criminal) had taken them. He's also brought home a giant straw hat, a high Viz jacket. Woolly hats and gloves. Shoes. Dolls. He's a menace. I wish he'd bring home fivers like another commenter's cat!!

Our little rescue cat adores my curry lol

my cat almost got accused of killing next door's bird 🙄

Yes, me too!! 😂

One of our cats once dumped a live mole under my bed. I could hear this strange scraping noise upstairs and it was a mole trying to escape through my floorboards.
I stupidly picked up said Mole and learned they have a vicious bite. He brought another one in the next week and I made sure I put on gardening gloves to pick the next one up!
Same cat used to leave live wild rabbits behind the tv and angry shouting shrews in my welly boots.

My beagle got into the spare room while we were out and ate TWO massive christening cakes ready for my sisters christening.

she used to eat everything, how she lived to 17 I don’t know.

My beautiful old Maine coon boy was built for comfort not for speed, but he did love a frog (and sometimes a leaf). His love for frogs was no doubt thanks to the fact we live by a stream (and no doubt also due to the fact they don’t move as fast as mice/voles etc). I would regularly come home and find a frog in the bath/hopping round the living room/behind the tv which was always a fun surprise! Frog would usually be unharmed but unimpressed (and released back to the stream). Cat was always as proud as punch.

I do wish he had brought me fivers though…

I had a marvellous cat who was rescued as a day old kitten from a litter from a feral cat. He had no fear and would disappear for days on patrol. He was desperate to be outside from a young age, so we had him neutered as soon as the vet would do it and off he went. We live rurally and we had presents of virtually every species of small mammal in the area. His specialty was wild rabbits, and he’d bring one back and then sit on the doorstep eating it all (although he’d make a gift of the feet to our other wussy cat who seemed to like that bit). Would take him nearly an hour and then he’d come inside and sleep for a day while it digested, then he’d be off again. We wouldn’t install a cat flap due to all the gifts we’d get.

He was a six dinner Sid and would stroll into the nearby pub and cadge from diners, in much the same way Greek cats do in touristy areas. Or sit by the fire in winter, until spotted by the staff and booted out. He was brought home in disgrace a few times until we said he could find his own way and feel free to just evict him from the building.

At home he’d do the periscope paw thing of fishing round your plate if he thought you weren’t looking and would eat any human food he could get. I miss him, he was a total character.

I've had this a couple of times:

1. I'd gutted and deboned some trout - went upstairs to the loo and came down to find a strange cat running down the garden with a beautifully prepared fish in its jaws (it was summer - the back door was open).

1. At one point I had a lodger. Whilst we had a conversation my cat helped himself to his dessert. When we turned round, there was my Silver Spotted sitting on the chair with his nose in the bowl!

Cats are definitely opportunists and most definitely CFs!

my mum sold a litter of kittens, one kitten was returned about 6 months later because the owners couldn’t cope with squirrels it kept bringing in!! One night it killed my baby rabbit… and my dad shop’s it off angrily, we never found the rabbits head and found the cat a couple of days later curled up dead in our neighbours garden! We’ve no idea whether it choked on part of the rabbit, or caught something off the rabbit… but it’s hunting days we’re over!

Another cat used to sit next door and stop their cats using their cat flap!

another of mums cats returned home one day with a budgie in its mouth… we chased it round and recovered the bird… it was pretty stiff so we decided it must’ve got the poor thing off someone’s compost bin.

My fluffy psychopath used to ‘break into’ my neighbours house and steal anything she could could lay her paws on. Then she would artfully arrange it on my lawn so it looked like I was goading them! Her finds included scouring pans, t towels and underwear!!!!
She would also gleefully sit in their front window and meow and paw the window at me because she knew I couldn’t get her out.
shortly after they bought two dogs and we moved out!

A furious screaming frog under the bed at 2am. Thought we were in an episode of Fawlty Towers trying to catch that sucker. Same fecker of a cat deposited a live squealing rat on top of the bed also in the middle of the night. It proceeded to run over DH’s face in its haste to escape. Same bloody cat gifted me a live weta and dropped it in my hair. If you don’t know what a weta is here’s a photo. I probably sounded like the frog trying to disentangle that thing from my scalp.

Cat banished outside now.

. I could hear this strange scraping noise upstairs and it was a mole trying to escape through my floorboards.

Aw! that's so sad. poor mr mole.

Our dog once stole a Sunday leg of lamb off the side of my GM-I-L pantry 🫣

My friend's cat came home with an uncooked turkey crown once. On Christmas Day! Apparently the cat was quite well known for its thievery, so she retrieved it from the cat, cleaned it off and popped it in the fridge, hoping someone would knock on the door and ask, but they never did!

I just have visions of the confusion of the poor family coming in to the kitchen thinking "WTF?"

Another friend's cat came back with a hot sausage from someone's BBQ once too - his whiskers were all curly from the heat!

I think I would prefer this than the live mice, blackbirds, robins and pigeons my cat brings back!

A friend was once staying in a hotel with his dog and had gone for a shower. For reasons I can’t remember a hotel receptionist knocked on their door so friends wife answered it. Dog bolted from the room to a function suite where a wedding buffet was in progress and helped himself, swiftly followed by his owner who was only wearing a towel and a horrified expression! Luckily the bride and groom found it hilarious

Mine likes croissants too, in fact she loves most bakery items. If you leave a packet out she will rip into it to eat the contents. She’s snaffled bread, scones and biscuits too. She particularly likes lemon cake or lemon muffins! Probably why she’s cost us a fortune at the vets with her bad teeth!