Jewish Orthodox mum AMA

[jewishorthomum]

I'm a 29 yr old Jewish Orthodox religious mum of 2 little boys. Is there anything you'd like to ask about Orthodox Jewish life?
Kill my time whilst I'm waiting to be called in for an appointment.
(When I get called in for my app I'll have to run but will try respond later if there are questions.)

It also means you can do things like carry your house keys (useful!)
https://www.myjewishlearning.com/article/eruv/

Thank this is really interesting. I confess I do t know much about your religion or lifestyle so learning loads here.

@PseudoBadger no, carrying things outside is forbidden on Shabbos, an eruv creates a boundary that allows carrying within the boundary.

If you holiday, where do you go?

What sort of activities do your DC do and do they/would they join in any clubs outside the community?

What kind of education did you have?

Do you work?

Are you satisfied with the opportunities and scope of experiences your lifestyle affords?

@loislovesstewie And I'm very sorry for your loss.

We would say: I wish you long life. May his memory be a blessing.

This does sound like a much better way of dealing with death than in other religions and very comforting for the bereaved family.

carrying e.g. carrying sefarim (holy books) food keys anything really

OP, if you were to recommend a traditional Jewish cookbook, which would be your top recommendation, and what would be the nicest recipes for a decent enough cook but with no experience of Jewish cooking? Or even just online recipes. Ideally with something meaty that can go in the slow cooker.

Thanks OP for such an interesting thread! 👍 I used to do live in work (maternity nursing) for families, many of whom were Orthodox Jewish, but that was nearly thirty years ago now.

One thing I wondered, as a vegetarian myself, is it considered okay for an orthodox Jewish person to be one? May seem a daft question, but there seemed so much importance attached to meals, especially on Sabbath, that included meat? Apologies if that is a really stupid question!

I guess one ignorant question (sorry I hope I’m not showing my stereotypical assumptions) is what is your view on same sex marriage and relationships? Is it like in Christianity where it’s accepted and open in some churches and condemned in others?

Marriage is the religious formalisation and sanctification of a permitted relationship, so same sex marriage is an oxymoron.

There are various forbidden relationships (adultery, some forms of incest, homosexual and more). The way one would relate to a couple living in sin would generally depend on the individual, ranging from openly condemning to having a live-and-let-live attitude. But no orthodox Jew would ever condone a forbidden relationship, and anyone living in such circumstances wouldn't really be considered part of the community.

@Guarentinaflo This does sound like a much better way of dealing with death than in other religions and very comforting for the bereaved family.

Yes, my heart aches for my non-Jewish friends and in-laws when I see them struggling with all the admin and decisions around funerals, as well as the long waiting times between death and the funeral, which is like a weird limbo. in a Jewish family, when someone dies, everything stops immediately. If you live further away you need to drop everything and travel immediately. When my husband's grandmother died, he had to carry on working for a week or two before he could go to be with his family for the funeral etc. It felt inhumane. No one is in a fit state to deal with that stuff when they've just lost someone.

I am non-practising myself (we do Shabbat at home, I go to shul on Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, and celebrate Pesach (Passover)) but I think I will re-join a shul just so that I know everything will be sorted when I die.

Synagogue membership costs money but it includes burial society fees so there are no additional costs when you die. It has all been paid for in advance.

Thank you for this AMA, it's very interesting. I actually rather like the sound of regular separation to focus on the non-physical side to a marriage. My question would be how do you feel about the UK at the moment? Are you worried about the future here? Do you feel antisemitism is growing or just being reported more, is it becoming more mainstream or more acceptable? I certainly feel things are freely said about Jews and Judaism that wouldn't be tolerated about other religions (apart from Christianity).

I am not OP but I would recommend anything and everything by Claudia Roden.

Claudia Rosen's The Book of Jewish Food: An Odyssey from Samarkand and Vilna to the Present Day is a good place to start.

Also, Nigella has a recipe called My Mother's Praised Chicken which is almost identical to something my mother cooked.

Am sure OP will lots of other suggestions too.

If you holiday, where do you go?

all over. loved going to scotland. lots to consider though because always has to be self catering and need to bring pots, pans, disposable plates, food etc,

What sort of activities do your DC do and do they/would they join in any clubs outside the community?

Swimming, lessons were outside the community (stopped because of covid) they love lego, puzzles, switch, playmobil, we play a lot of board games together, particularly on shabbos, one son loves to cycle, etc. we emigrated from the uk, and since then they spend a lot of time outdoors here. I love crafting, but I'm not in any clubs. Husband loves cycling.

What kind of education did you have?
I have a bachelors, and some professional training, and want to eventually do a phd

Do you work?
Yes, part time at the moment for various reasons, husband full time. he has a bachelors, plus further professional qualifications.

Are you satisfied with the opportunities and scope of experiences your lifestyle affords?
yes, very

@Ortiguilla I'll take recommendations from anyone - thank you!

Do you feel Kier has done enough to punish Abbott after her disgraceful comments

@passthegingordon anything by Evelyn Rose, although don't know if she did a lot of slow cooker recipes.
Also an American cookbook, Dinner done.

Just to say that LGBT... relationships are generally accepted within the more liberal branches of Judaism, including Masorti.
In fact, a Jewish lesbian couple were among the couples to get married on the first day that same-sex marriage was legalised in the UK
https://www.timesofisrael.com/jewish-woman-among-first-to-marry-same-sex-partner-in-uk/

This is a wonderful thread. Thank you so much for taking the time and having the patience to answer all of the questions asked. It has been so useful and informative to read. I'm Christian and from the Middle East originally. I have some questions, which I hope you don't mind answering.

For food, how would you prepare meals in order to keep everything kosher? I read what you had written about keeping things separate in the kitchen, and I understand that there are foods that you cannot eat. If I was to prepare some food for my friends who are Muslim, I would make something vegetarian or vegan just so that I am sure that it would be suitable and not haram. If I was to prepare food for a friend who is Jewish, what would be suitable? I do understand that Orthodox Jews wouldn't be able to have anything from my home! I often bring food in to share with workmates (and I would always give the list of ingredients used). We fast (go vegan) for many days of our own religious calendar so I understand the importance of observing these rules.

For patients in hospital, who are Jewish, how best can I - as a nurse - support them?

Sorry, these sound like such stupid questions!! Thank you again for starting this thread :)

@highfidelity Thanks! Nigella sometimes posts her Jewish cooking on social media - her cakes and sweet recipes also look amazing. I honestly think there is no nicer food than jewish apple cake

Thank you for this

What are FFBs and BTs?

@EllaDisenchanted - have you taken over from the OP, or is this a name change fail?.

A health vegetarian would be OK, but not a moral vegetarian. Hashem (G-d) is the source of all compassion and mercy, and if He deemed it permitted to eat animals, it would be heretical to consider oneself more moral than Hashem.

(It's actually not just permitted, but that's how animals achieve their goal and the reason for creation. When we eat food in order to be healthy and able to serve Hashem, the animal is part of that chain. It's also how the earth and grass play their part in serving Hashem.)

@JeweyJew thank you for your answer.