Today my teenager was upset because.....

[Positivelypatient]

On the back of the amusing threads about the irrationality of toddlers and their meltdowns, I have this for you.

Today my 17 DD is upset because I suggested booking an expensive (for me as a single parent) spa day for her and her sisters and me that we would go to on her 18th birthday. I hasten to add this is NOT in place of presents, cake and special attention for the birthday girl. Apparently I have made her feel worthless for suggesting she share her special day with her family.

And no…. I didn’t notice the girls highlights who was standing three people BEHIND me whilst queuing for the headteachers talk. Silly me, if only I’d looked I’d know how she wants her hair

Because I haven't washed his clothes quickly enough

These 'clothes' have been lying on his floor for roughly 3 weeks

The rules are: washing has to be in the laundry basket to be washed

Him: well there's no point putting them in there as I need them within the hour
🤣🤣🤣🤣 I really laughed at that one

My dd is mad at me for the size of her feet. Want to be a size 3 not a 2. She's only turned 13 so lots of time to grow a few more sizes

@Flossie44

Yourdeadtome - my son also thought that his 6 hours of lectures a week at uni (also non vocational) equated to ‘too busy to get a job’. In his final year, when in fact he had his dissertation to write as well, he strangely got a job! And then announced how amazing it was to have money!! Funny ole thing! 🙄

Poor loves

@SmartCar

My dd is mad at me for the size of her feet. Want to be a size 3 not a 2. She's only turned 13 so lots of time to grow a few more sizes

At her age, my shoe size was 13 - yes, child 13. Grew to a 3, so there's hope for her still.

I have two recent ones:
I said he had to pay his own Ucas fee (£25) because I’d already subbed him £45 for shoes he didn’t buy and had generously allowed him to keep the money anyway. So he’s still £25 up (and has a job).
He can’t take the cat to uni next year - apparently she’s ‘his’ cat despite him never doing anything to help care for her (and she’s of course obsessed with him!).

DD (15) was in tears this evening as I told her how lovely her cheekbones looked.

Apparently this is not cool as she wants a baby round face and now she looks older and triangular and OMFG let me just take photos of myself with my phone and howl and FFS mum you've ruined my life

Etc

@ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba

why do some posters think that we need someone to fix it for us? or that their judgement is welcome?
this is not a thread where insights and unsolicited advice are required.
we are just letting off steam

we are capable of handling our own teens,
so stop the bloody unwanted counselling and let us get on with the eyerolling and tutting for our own entertainment. cheers

Exactly this. Thank you ☺️

Just come on to vent again!! I love that most parents with teenagers know how I feel.

I'm sitting outside crying with frustration. DS son is in a mood as he's just been paid I've asked him for £150 of the £300 he owes me. He got paid fucking £600!!

Then I went downstairs and EVERY single door is open and lights are on, including the door to the garage so all the heating has just blown outside. I've just paid £700 for oil for the heating.

I very calmly called him downstairs and asked him if what he thinks was wrong with what I could see.

He's now in a bigger sulk.

I keep trying to remind myself he's a good boy really. He works part-time while at college and he doesn't mug old ladies (I know a low bar :) )

He's just a normal teenager but it's so fucking frustrating and upsetting.

Fucking teenagers are vile.

I'm tired and pissed off, and need another parent of a teenager to remind me it does pass!!

I think parents who still have young DCs just don't understand. When they're young and vile, at least later you get a cuddle or a little kiss and everything is ok again.

But teenagers are just like an angry cactus. You just can't cuddle them or get any warmth from them.

@SparklyDino

Just come on to vent again!! I love that most parents with teenagers know how I feel.

I'm sitting outside crying with frustration. DS son is in a mood as he's just been paid I've asked him for £150 of the £300 he owes me. He got paid fucking £600!!

Then I went downstairs and EVERY single door is open and lights are on, including the door to the garage so all the heating has just blown outside. I've just paid £700 for oil for the heating.

I very calmly called him downstairs and asked him if what he thinks was wrong with what I could see.

He's now in a bigger sulk.

I keep trying to remind myself he's a good boy really. He works part-time while at college and he doesn't mug old ladies (I know a low bar :) )

He's just a normal teenager but it's so fucking frustrating and upsetting.

Fucking teenagers are vile.

I'm tired and pissed off, and need another parent of a teenager to remind me it does pass!!

I think parents who still have young DCs just don't understand. When they're young and vile, at least later you get a cuddle or a little kiss and everything is ok again.

But teenagers are just like an angry cactus. You just can't cuddle them or get any warmth from them.

I live the angry cactus anology!

Yes this age has very little joy for the parent.
Small glimpses infrequently but no proper joy
I'm told they come back

Starting to see that with dd
Ds only just starting

The cactus is in bloom

I guess I'm lucky that mine cuddle me daily, I get kisses too. they do talk to me and we tease each other, which is hilarious.

Don't get me wrong, there are passionate sweary arguments too; they are no angels (and nor am I).
Bar the occasion tantrum they are actually rather nice and reasonable.

Maybe the old saying is true: "if you don't know who the angry cactus is, that's because it's you".😳 oops

I'm tired and pissed off, and need another parent of a teenager to remind me it does pass!!
Hang in there. It will pass. My eldest turned a corner at 18. He semi left home at that point and had the odd night with us every couple of months. From the age of around 20 he would phone us to see if we fancied going for a drink with him or out for tea. He has gone from knowing everything and giving you really bored looks when you used to try and tell him something to phoning us to see which insurance company we use for building contents!
Last night me and DH went into town for a quick drink and the other son turns up with his mates unexpectedly.They sat with us all night and we all had a great night.

I bought my DS a cactus a few Christmases ago, as that was what he was like! It raised a bit of a smile and enabled me to communicate how I was finding him in a light-hearted way.

My almost teen doesn't like me today because I've made him go to school. It has reminded me that the troublesome times are on the horizon.

Barely managed to survive DDs tempestuous two years in one piece, which ended 18 months ago. Just got to hang on tight again...

My cousin, mother of four grown up children, laughed when I mentioned things were getting tough with DD. She said to put a tin hat on and hold on tight as it was going to be a wild ride. She wasn't wrong.

@notacooldad

I'm tired and pissed off, and need another parent of a teenager to remind me it does pass!! Hang in there. It will pass. My eldest turned a corner at 18. He semi left home at that point and had the odd night with us every couple of months. From the age of around 20 he would phone us to see if we fancied going for a drink with him or out for tea. He has gone from knowing everything and giving you really bored looks when you used to try and tell him something to phoning us to see which insurance company we use for building contents! Last night me and DH went into town for a quick drink and the other son turns up with his mates unexpectedly.They sat with us all night and we all had a great night.

I wish my 20 year old had turned a corner😤

My DD is not happy that I pointed out that her plan of working at her low paid job, that was taken at the start of her college course, and doing lots of gym courses was not a good reason to drop out of college.
she asked me what I expected her to contribute to and when I said living she was astonished. I pointed out that both DH and I worked fulltime and her choice was education or working where she would contribute to house hold bills she was not happy. She was actually livid when I pointed out that she would only have 4 weeks paid holiday as a new employee. She has just handed in an assignment that was due today!

18yo DS2 was mightily annoyed because I wouldn't give him a lift TO THE END OF OUR ROAD!

DD is currently in high dudgeon because two second google showed that there was in fact quite a few jobs she could apply for.

I asked him to have a shower because he hasn't had one for days

My 17 year old DS is outraged today because I reminded him about putting a cheque into his bank account today. He was going past the bank on his way to meet his mates! But outrage erupted because he had to walk back upstairs to his room to get the cheque!

He was outraged the other day because he absent-mindedly said "love you, Mum" at the end of a 'phone call whilst with his mates at college - and they teased him for it. As 17/18 year old lads tend to...

Poor cherub!

On Saturday all kids and I cleaned house as grandparents coming to stay this week. DD1 had lots of homework so I let her off the communal bits as long as she did her room- surfaces literally black with dust. Came in to inspect after and piles of clothes had been Moved from one side to another, shoes and bags everywhere, bin overflowing, floor not hoovered, SURFACES NOT CLEANED. My restrained admonishment was met with full scale crying rage about how I’m always criticizing her.

Mine had an epic tantrum last night because we didn’t have any sour cream. This meant that she had wasted all of her time and effort making enchiladas which would now have to go straight in the bin. Full scale crying, banging about etc. At no point had she either checked if we had sour cream, or asked me to buy any when doing the shopping.

We all ate the enchiladas, including her. They were perfectly edible even without the addition of sour cream 🙄.

I clapped my hands at a sporting event when our team scored!

My teenager was upset because we took her to Greece with other families and her friends all inclusive but not her boyfriend . She moaned and sulked all week ...............
Then broke up with him