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Original poster

What is supposed to be romantic, but just bloody isn’t?

880 replies

SmidgenofaPigeon · 29/04/2021 10:59

A Semisonic song just came on the radio and brought me back to when I was 18, and the slightly-hippy lovely guy I was seeing at the time used to play this on his guitar and sing to me. The whole song, then another song after it. Sometimes another one after that. I’d sort of sit on the bed or hover in front of him while he played his little concert just for me and smile along, but I found it excruciating. If he didn’t want to kiss me he wanted to be singing to me. It was so boring and I never knew how I was supposed to be reacting.

I couldn’t hack it so we didn’t last, and my friend was horrified and said what a lovely romantic thing that was that he did and how awful I was for ending it 😂

Has anyone got any ‘romantic’ things to add that were just a bit boring/awkward?

OP posts:
Allhallowseve · 29/04/2021 21:24

First dance at a wedding is so cringey I didn't have one just couldn't do it. Also wedding photos of the couple gazing at each other I find really cringe too!

Kiki275 · 29/04/2021 21:33

@ShutUpAlex

Oooh we love sharing a bath or shower. We have a really big bath though.

If someone serenaded me I’d die on the spot of embarrassment.

I told my fiancée that if he proposed to me in public I’d never speak to him again.

I agree with all of this!

Add in asking my fathers permission for my hand in marriage. That would have been a massive dealbreaker.x

TheresAnEyeInMeSoup · 29/04/2021 21:41

He would take me to the train (okay) and then bloody run after it as it set off. I was meant to wave madly and find it romantic. Ugh
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

BanditoShipman · 29/04/2021 21:43

@Firenight

Being touched while I'm asleep. I loathe it and my husband does it. You would think after nearly 20 years he would have got the message.
Do you mean touched sexually while you are asleep? If so, that is not good :(
HesSpartacus · 29/04/2021 21:44

Valentines Day dinners. Lots of couples staring at each other and desperately feeling like they should be having a good time in spite of the godawful set menu they're enduring.

MrsMaizel · 29/04/2021 21:48

Being asked if he could touch my hair and then brush it 😬 It was a bit too much serial murderer.

deeplyambivalent · 29/04/2021 21:50

Add in asking my fathers permission for my hand in marriage. That would have been a massive dealbreaker.

Oh yeah, that's what my xDP did before the public proposal. My poor old dad - I think he said something like: 'don't ask me; she's the boss' but I wish he'd warned me. Difficult position for him.

poppycat10 · 29/04/2021 22:05

@SamusIsAGirl

Walking you home. Actually a bit creepy and stalkery since then they'll know where you live.
I never thought of it that way. Got guys to walk me home all the time as a student. Never thought of it as a romantic thing though.
MutteringDarkly · 29/04/2021 22:13

@Zalto

Requests on the radio, especially when the presenter reads them out in a very serious voice.

I’m looking at you, Steve Wright.

“Our next letter is from Fernando in Fulchester who wants us to know how much his wife, Espadrille, means to him. Espadrille, Fernando can’t believe that you’ve been married for 36 years now. Apart from your shared love of caravanning and ferrets, you also share three wonderful children who are all delighted to be with you on your special day.
Fernando tells us that you’ve had your ups and downs, but you’ve made it through with lots of love and laughter.
Espadrille, the next song is for you, from Fernando...”

fades to Caravan of Love

This is brilliant.
Kaydogsdinner · 29/04/2021 22:22

Drinking in the student bar with a guy I really fancied, I was working hard on him...I don't think he was as interested in me but perhaps he was flattered so he suggested we go and 'stand in the rain'Shock and I bloody did it (proper fancied him), after standing there shivering for a while we went back to his room and he serenaded me with the 'cello and then we spooned, all damp and cold 🥶.

susiebluebell · 29/04/2021 22:23

Forehead kisses! Eurgh! Supposed to be romantic but I find them infantilising and somehow distant. Plus I always think what if my forehead is greasy and he's then got greasy lips...

Rhannion · 29/04/2021 22:55

Sex on the beach is awful, however
sex in a warm ocean is fab

NamechangeApril21 · 29/04/2021 23:04

@evilharpy

All of the above. Can't stand any of it.

Back in the days when we had terrestrial telly and a TIVO type box, my husband used to randomly record things he thought I might like (now he just adds it to the Prime watchlist). He always brings me a pastry home from Sainsburys and if I'm stressed about something an unasked for cup of tea will often appear. That's the kind of romance I prefer Grin

You have the perfect husband!
MovingForwardish · 29/04/2021 23:13

My ex ran me a bath with tea lights in it.... got in, within 4 seconds was covered in wax. Looked like Freddy Krueger

Pinkyavocado · 29/04/2021 23:16

Urgh I hate all sorts of romance. Baths full of rose petals, dinner by candlelight anything.

Another vote for Paris. The history is great but the actual place is a shit hole, same as New York. Absolutely filthy places.

Holothane · 29/04/2021 23:18

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 to all of this,

Mamanyt · 29/04/2021 23:20

@CaMePlaitPas

Sex in the sand. I can barely lie down on a beach towel without feeling uncomfortable. Sand sticks everywhere just ugh.
GOD, THIS! All those television advertisements for cologne and such with people rolling rapturously in the sand...let me tell you, I spent much of my early life living right on a beach, and you will end up with sand in places where there should NEVER be sand! Like making love with someone who is wearing a sandpaper condom!
TheLesserOfTwoWeevils · 29/04/2021 23:23

Rose petals strewn everywhere. I can get how it looks romantic but someone's got to clean it all up

ifIwerenotanandroid · 29/04/2021 23:24

@RampantIvy

Paris
Oh no! Paris was our first holiday together & it was fantastic. We had a hotel that was so old & classy that they looked me up & down one day & asked, "Are you staying 'ere?" as though they couldn't believe it. We had croissanty breakfast in our deep, billowy bed every day, & one day the chambermaid walked in on us cosily in flagrante after breakfast & retreated with an, "Oh, excusez moi!".

Romantic? Of course it was.

BlackAmericanoNoSugar · 29/04/2021 23:28

Marrying a prince. It's the ultimate happy ending in a lot of fairy tales, but seems to be a bit of a chore in real life.

Enough4me · 29/04/2021 23:32

I went to Paris for a weekend with a boyfriend who had Aspergers (not emotionally expressive at all) and he spent ages working out where we could find cheap croissants. We were in our 40s and not broke. It was the opposite of romance and the final straw!

sessell · 29/04/2021 23:34

Another one for Paris!

ifIwerenotanandroid · 29/04/2021 23:35

Like evilharpy (above somewhere), my DH used to bring me pastries. We didn't have a Waitrose near us, but every few weeks he had to go to another town & there was one there, so he'd bring me a pale pink box of their fresh baklava & it was a real treat & a loving gesture.

All the romance was lost when they built a Waitrose down the road & I could buy them whenever I wanted. Then the buggers took the patisserie counter away & that was the end of that.

thenightsky · 29/04/2021 23:36

@LadyofMisrule

I saw footage of an amazing woman who had been doing an endurance race and beaten all the competition (male and female). An absolutely astonishing performance. And what did her partner do? Proposed as she crossed the line. YOU COULDN'T LET HER HAVE JUST THIS ONE THING, COULD YOU?
Didn't that also happen to the female British Gold medallist cyclist in the London Olympics? Poor woman.
Shodan · 29/04/2021 23:39

@Misshapencha0s OMG you've just triggered a memory of 2nd XH that I had obviously buried deep...

We went for a meal at Nando's (IKR? So romantic) and we're sitting there, waiting for our food, when he reaches across the table and grabs my hand.

Ok, not ideal (too many bottles of sauce on the table), but I can cope.

Then he locked eyes with me and slowly brought my hand up to his mouth. I gently tried to pull it back, but he persisted- and then stuck one of my fingers in his mouth and started sucking it Shock.

Traumatising I tell you.

(If memory serves, once he'd finished, I withdrew my hand and said "Let's not ever do that again, ok?" while wiping my spitty finger on my napkin)