Whats the best quote you have heard from a parent in passing?

[Backtoreality1]

Had a lovely one yesterday....family were in their back garden but mum could be heard from the front in total exasperation saying ' xxxx, you are getting on my last nerve today'. Wasn't said with aggression just a clear voice with the tone of someone who was getting so tired. I wanted to go and give her a hug and I have never met her!

“You’re grounded!”

“Why?!”

“Because you’re being an arsehole - that’s why.”

Little, girl next door chatting away. Then 'am I talking to you daddy, or am I talking to the wall?'

Wrong thread

Don't sit by a hot radiator, you'll melt your kidneys 😂

Said by my mum!

On holiday in America a mum said to a little boy ‘What privilege do you want to lose first Forrest?’ It became a family catch phrase for us for a while.

My friend to her then 5 year old DD who announced she was about to be sick whilst out and about in town...

"Dont be so ridiculous!!" She said, in her defence, that she was sort of hoping that if she said that then her DD would change her mind:o

She didnt, obviously, and my friend ended up holding her DD over a litter bin to yack up!

Oh and just remembered one I have posted on here before.....

The day after we came back from a Keycamp holiday in France. We are not posh and we are not rich. DD (now 19, then about 4) seemed to think otherwise.... She insisted on speaking what little french she had picked up while we were there all the way around Tesco as I was doing the shopping and refused to speak to me unless I spoke french too. I pointed out some Pain au Chocolat and said that it would be nice to get some like we had had on holiday. She then said in English "Oh no Mummy, they wont be anywhere near as nice as the ones we had in Paris!"

Cue lots of those kind of looks that you give to the performance parent, which I feel was harsh as actually she was a performance daughter!

Oh mate have some self respect is my all time favourite ever!

Outside a lift in the much lamented Tyrrell and Green department store in Southampton, years ago. Ultra - posh-looking lady with son dressed in ultra - posh-looking school uniform, as I exited the lift: "For pity's SAKE, Hamilton, STOP FARTING!!"

At a campsite I literally heard multiple versions of the same conversation (around 9.30- 10pm)
Usually dad saying " (insert names) for the last time its bedtime, be quiet, all the other children on the campsite will be asleep and your voices will disturb them"
...except none of the children were asleep and they were all getting the same lecture

On the busy school run walking over a footbridge. A DS was wandering aimlessly from side to side.
Other mum "PICK A SIDE! The middle is not a side".
Me

'What's for tea Mum?'
'Airy pie and windy pudding' DM used to say

In Universal Studios browsing the obligatory gift shops and overheard a HUGE exasperated Canadian bloke in a thick Canadian accent to his 2 tiny kids

‘You Are Not Cooperating !!’

Still makes me grin

This was a couple of years ago, but I will never forget saying this to my dc
“No you can’t use a toy saw to chop your brothers head off”

A man, chucked his daughter under the chin, shook his head gently, and said with genuine affection: oh, you're a funny wee cunt

Parent: Do stop picking snot out of your nose!
Child: I'm not, I'm putting it back!

DD was fretting that the physio would let go of her when she was doing rehab after surgery.

The no-nonsense physio responded with “Oh, I’d never drop you, you can’t imagine the amount of paperwork I’d have to do if I dropped you”

On a plane a woman said to her son 'stop crying or we'll leave you behind,'.

That's not actually that funny but it kind of was at the time!

One I remember from a brilliant book called "Eves Droppings " by Nigel Reese

"Well my mother lost hers on the lawn in front of the vicar"

But my personal one from my mother to a woman who had just let her cat jump off her lap as our dog walked up and sniffed her skirt where the cat had been
"Look she can smell your pussy"

You would have to know my mum to believe she didn't realise what she had said.. She was famous for putting her foot in it.🙂

Overheard in the morning at a music festival in Wales "But Bronwen, it's lucky to find a spider in your cereal".

If I was getting on their nerves, my parents used to say "Oh go and hang round outside the chippy!"

Because this was what all the rough kids did in our village - it was the 80s and there wasn't much to do. The idea that I'd do that was ridiculous as I wasn't allowed!

From my gran. "They might kill you, but they can't cook you and eat you!" Also from my gran, "Do NOT pee on my head and tell me it's raining!"

come over here until I slap you