Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Mumsnet classics

Relive the funniest, most unforgettable threads. For a daily dose of Mumsnet’s best bits, sign up for Mumsnet's daily newsletter.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

Whats the best quote you have heard from a parent in passing?

354 replies

Backtoreality1 · 02/03/2021 13:46

Had a lovely one yesterday....family were in their back garden but mum could be heard from the front in total exasperation saying ' xxxx, you are getting on my last nerve today'. Wasn't said with aggression just a clear voice with the tone of someone who was getting so tired. I wanted to go and give her a hug and I have never met her!

OP posts:
TheLostDiadem · 02/03/2021 20:47

I was in a Zoom meeting recently with a woman who obviously had kids at home in the background. She was incredibly business like and efficient but twice turned to look at someone off camera and said perfectly calmly “put down the hammer Eddie” and later “Emma don’t drink paint”. I aspire to that level of calm.

Stovetopespresso · 02/03/2021 20:49

"do NOT kick the priest!" in church at front of communion line Grin

Bobbiepin · 02/03/2021 20:49

@ECPCR2

I never thought I'd have to repeatedly say "please use your toothbrush on your teeth, not your willy"
Misread that and thought it meant brushing his teeth with his willy
DenisetheMenace · 02/03/2021 20:50

Call me old fashioned but I’d rather not touch frogs.

Annoy · 02/03/2021 20:52

I’m crying right now 🤣🤣

Stovetopespresso · 02/03/2021 20:53

@Bobbiepin now that would be a gifted child!

dementedma · 02/03/2021 20:54

I did once utter the immortal line “Will whoever left an eyeball on the mantelpiece kindly remove it!”

Sidge · 02/03/2021 20:55

Sitting in the garden this last weekend in the sunshine.

Heard a male voice in a neighbouring garden wail “ohhh nooooo, please don’t go out and leave me alone with the children”.

Followed by the giggles of a small group of small children.

FrickinA · 02/03/2021 20:59

To a small child who had got herself lost in M&S and was crying to her mum that she’d thought the mum had left without her
‘ I would NEVER EVER leave you, NEVER. Think of all those months you spent growing in my tummy. Would I go to all that trouble just to leave you in Marksies ?’ Followed by a big hug...

PurpleSpaceyTwinkles · 02/03/2021 21:01

“If you Google an alpaca there will be trouble” - me to daughter who was deploying her best bedtime procrastination techniques.

chocolateorangeinhaler · 02/03/2021 21:01

"No, you can't drive the car home because you are four. Now please get in the back like I asked you to five minutes ago"

Fieldings15 · 02/03/2021 21:03

My dad always used to say "you've delighted us enough" which I think he stole from Jane Austen... Probably justified with 3 daughters though Grin

Meredithgrey1 · 02/03/2021 21:03

Oh god, I totally misread the thread title and thought it was asking about things parents had said before passing. As in, parents’ final words...
The first few responses totally threw me before I went back to check the title

drumst1ck · 02/03/2021 21:08

'Will you please stop licking my mole!'

Overheard in the swimming pool changing rooms Grin

CaffeineAndCrochet · 02/03/2021 21:08

A dad telling his daughter to 'get down and stop playing on the cannon'. I bet there was a sentence he never thought he'd say.

MissLucyEyelesbarrow · 02/03/2021 21:08

I totally nicked my friend's favourite saying to her DC: "You know I can't hear you when you use your whiny voice" Grin

margaritasbythesea · 02/03/2021 21:09

Me: 'DD! you are more important than a crisp!'

Woman crossing the road behind me behind me, 'snurkleflrurprah'

dementedma · 02/03/2021 21:09

I also stole from Georgette Heyer “ Your conversation is as edifying as always, but I believe we can dispense with it”

SaharaSavana · 02/03/2021 21:10

@SplendidSuns1000

Heard DH say to niece 'Darling please don't poo in the litter tray while the cat's in it.' She now calls that cat 'poo head'

The best one was when niece's grandmother said "Back in my day we ate all our broccoli and peas before we got pudding" and niece replied with "Back in my day Grannies were quiet" Grin

Your niece is very rude.
GirlofInkandStars · 02/03/2021 21:16

“Please take that bogie into the garden” So DS did, walked around the garden, brought it back in... and then ate it.

Inthemuckheap · 02/03/2021 21:16

My father always told us to "play quiet reading games" when we were too rowdy. We all love reading so it definitely worked!

mumsiedarlingrevolta · 02/03/2021 21:18

Passed 2 Mums whilst dog walking.
They were discussing home schooling and one said "I must admit I opened the wine at 4:30 yesterday"

Carried on walking, passed a couple more who stopped to admire ddog and chat about homeschooling and lockdown and I mentioned what previous passersby had said-that Mum looked at me and said
"we opened the wine at lunchtime yesterday"

Really tickled me Grin

alexis4theppl · 02/03/2021 21:18

My Grandad to my younger brother and 3 boy cousins... "don't think, your not good at it"

mummabear74 · 02/03/2021 21:22

"Stop behaving like a child". Unfortunately it was me to my 7 year old!

GirlofInkandStars · 02/03/2021 21:24

On the phone with a customer, a very posh man booking expensive flights. Trying to be very professional. He was talking to a child in the background. He didn’t know that I speak his home language...

In between a very business like professional call...

DC no. wait a minute

DC no go to the toilet and wait for daddy.

No, leave your pants on!

Not on the floor!

DC no. Don’t put your hands in it!

I did suggest I would happily call him back to complete the call later but he insisted on carrying on. His call with me never deviated from professional either. Included on the booking was a 2 year old DC!