I bought a white coat in the sales to look like Olivia Pope, but I actually resemble a middle aged taekwando instructor

[DollyMixtureLulus]

I love the flow chart

@RedRec
I loved him, I also remember when he told Hugh Grant that when he was on screen it looked like someone had thrown a wooden chair on set.

Years ago in my early 20s, we had a very strict dress code at work. Basically tailoring. I wasn't earning much so really had to buy carefully.

I found a beautiful Joseph short sleeved pale blue fitted cotton shirt (for 50p!) in a charity shop, it had a button down collar and sort of epaulettes in the same colour on the shoulders. It was light and cool but still smart under my suit jacket. Perfect for the office in the summer.

I went out to meet my friends in a bar in the evening, took off my jacket and they all pissed themselves laughing. Apparently I looked like a warden from Prisoner Cell Block H.

Never wore it again

Oh, and I was young and a size 8. Still looked like a pillock!

I have several pairs of dungarees, I'm past caring what other people think since I'm middle aged!
I currently have my eye on a pair with daisies on them.

Full marks for the flow chart
Yes, the wellies go with the fishmonger hat. Add the white wrap coat and you'll almost smell of haddock!

These.

"step away from the floral dungarees!"

@fairyannie

Years ago, I had what I thought was a trendy jacket which had a very thin hood cleverly hidden inside the collar.

When it rained (as it always does), instead of having to put up an umbrella, I fumbled for this insubstantial creased thing at the back of my neck and eventually pulled it tight with the shoe lace things around my face.

My husband said that I looked like Jack Nicholson in The Shining when he's hacking down the door and looking through the smashed gap.

Umbrella it is now.

Never used any type of hood since.

Just spluttered coffee everywhere 😂😂😂😂

Those daisies look like they've been photoshopped on.
They don't even look good on the tall skinny model... really don't go with those tattoos.

@IHaveBrilloHair ooh they’re nice!

@IHaveBrilloHair those daisies are not even on the dungarees - the photo is just badly edited. I'd be a bit wary!

I suggest we start a Fashion Anonymous Club. If you're tempted to buy something, but feel it may be a tiny risk/Robin Hood/Brownie/fishmonger, run it by us first.
In fact I'm going to start it now..... see S&B

I've started our Fashion Anonymous Club on S&B. Feel free to run (crazy) ideas past the group.

Oh.
No crap daisy dungarees then.
At least I won't be back on here moaning about them!

@Maireas

I've started our Fashion Anonymous Club on S&B. Feel free to run (crazy) ideas past the group.

Brilliant idea!

@Beachcomber

When I was young and in my first proper job I had hardly any clothes that were suitable for work and that combined with living in a flat without a washing machine meant that I would have to juggle my small wardrobe in order to be work presentable.

I lived in France at the time and there was a fashion for 3/4 length black boot cut trousers of which I had a pair. I teamed them one-day with black boots and the only clean top I had which was blue velour. What I thought looked smart casual turned out to be Startrek extra. I only realised when I saw a colleague do a double take and then snigger on seeing me in the morning.
I was mortified but had to stay and work all day with people saying "beam them up Scottie" (I'm Scottish). The velour top actually had a wee yellow logo on my left boob 😩

Seriously considered changing jobs as I was so embarrassed.

Your photo takes me back to one of the nicest compliments (?) my ex ever paid me. I turned up for a date in black trousers, black boots and blue top and he said "phasers on stunning!"

Here's a link in case anyone has difficulty finding S&B

Fashion Anonymous Club - fishmonger alert http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/styleandd_beauty/4140908-Fashion-Anonymous-Club-fishmonger-alert

@ErrolTheDragon

There seem to be some general rules we can extract from this excellent thread. So, if you're anything other than long slim model proportions: 1) Jumpsuits and dungarees: don't. 2) If the word 'chic' enters your thought processes: do a serious reality check before buying. 3) dots: check for mr blobby and Minnie Mouse likeness.

I desperately wanted a midi fine pleated skirt to (deluded moi?) waft around in.....I found one I liked, tried it on and I looked like a discarded lampshade.
Back to dreaming!

@NovemberR

I'm embarrassed to admit to this, because actually most of your fashion faux pas sound edgy, expensive and cool - and mine is far from that. I blame the strain of this year and the lack of places to shop, but just before Christmas I bought some red woolly leggings with white spots (like falling snow) on them. In Lidl. (Essential shops only open). I vaguely thought I had a red sweater at home. They would be cosy, comfy, Christmassy cheery.

And I would look like the advert model eating Lindor chocolate in a Swiss log cabin.

My sweater finished at the waist! And the leggings were so thin (and stretched) you could see my massive pants through them. I looked like a solidly built toddler who'd been dressed by their father. A father who'd forgotten their bottom half and just shoved a pair of tights on them.
My adult DD pissed herself and kept saying but I don't understand why you didn't know they would look shit?

She doesn't understand that in my head I'm genuinely surprised by my mirror...

You are brilliant, I can't stop laughing! 😂

Loved the fishmonger as well 😂😂

I bought a Barbour style lightly padded coat from TkMaxx, didn't notice the pointy shoulders when trying it on hurriedly in the lounge. Set off to collect DD. When accidentally glancing my reflection in the classroom window as I was rushing for the school run, I realised that it was indeed a coat made for Klingons. It is known as the Klingon coat now. And no, a large scarf does not detract attention from the pointy shoulders.

I bought a camel and black wool cape thinking I looked chic, was horrified to spot myself in a shop window and I looked more like Margaret Rutherford the buxom, sartorially challenged Head mistress out of the original St Trinians.....it went straight to charity..

When I was 11 I begged my Mum to buy me a pink see through coat of the type that was fashionable then. From C&A, natch.

A boy at school asked me why I was wearing a rubber johnny coat.

I was upset and told my Mum, she said "hmmm I can see what he means"

Never wore the coat again.

Wax on wax off Daniel Son