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Original poster

My husband received something very strange in the post ...

999 replies

OnSilverStars · 12/01/2021 11:05

In the post today, my husband received a letter. It was hand written with his name and address on the outside. No return info. The writing in the envelope is definitely a woman's

Inside is a copy of an "essay" I googled it and it's by Robert Louise Stevenson. It called "on Marriage"

The gist of it is that marriage has lots of ups and downs and requires communication

There is nothing else. No name, just a folded print out of this essay.

Any explanation, other than my fear? I have no reason other than this to suspect anything.

YABU - don't jump to conclusions

YANBU - he's cheated.

I'm shaking. This feels so surreal. I hope I'm overreacting. He's currently at work.

Ps. We open each other's post. We think nothing of it - usually. It's always junk or bills

OP posts:
Thread gallery
12
hp2 · 12/01/2021 16:45

sorry AdobeWanKenobi I binned it . We concluded it was JW as it was signed off by someone and then said something about Jehovah. I asked around and apparently it’s a new way of spreading the word as they can go door to door during COVID-19.

CecilyP · 12/01/2021 16:46

Someone has maybe thought he's the only one in his area, copied down the address, but it's actually the wrong man?

I think that's the most logical explanation I've read one here!

Random789 · 12/01/2021 16:47

I'm amazed by all the posters who question whether you can tell someone's sex from their handwriting. Obviously not everyone has handwriting that reveals their sex, but lots and lots of people do. There are two or three broad 'types' of handwriting that are very likely indeed to be female.

And its easy to check whether attributions of sex on the basis of handwriting are reliable -- since it happens quite frequently that you later meet someone whose writing you have seen.

AdobeWanKenobi · 12/01/2021 16:48

@hp2

sorry AdobeWanKenobi I binned it . We concluded it was JW as it was signed off by someone and then said something about Jehovah. I asked around and apparently it’s a new way of spreading the word as they can go door to door during COVID-19.
Was it exactly the same text as OP received?

Thats the important bit really.

LondonJax · 12/01/2021 16:51

Wait until he gets home and ask then.

If you think about it, even if it were from some OW or a friend trying to warn you, why would they address it to your DH?

We don't open each other's mail - it just sits on the side until we get home. If something looks urgent or has an indication that it's something DH has been waiting for (like an appointment from the hospital), I'd ring him and ask him if he'd like me to open it. Just so he can confirm the appointment or whatever rather than waiting 24 hours.

Other than that, if he had something like this addressed to him, I'd never know. So if he were playing away, he'd easily be able to destroy it. It'd make more sense if someone sent it to you.

VinylDetective · 12/01/2021 16:57

usually hell and brimfire - and why would it have op's dh's name on it? Theyd have no way of knowing that

It’s fire and brimstone! Anyone can find that information on the electoral register.

BrimFullOfAsher · 12/01/2021 16:57

Do people who cba to RTFT (which isn't unreasonable) realise they can (and should as a minimum) just filter the OPs posts?

BIWI · 12/01/2021 16:58

@BoomyBooms

I'll probably get dumped on for judging older people but it looks like something an older person would have made at a library or something

@Historydweeb

Have you been arguing lately? Sounds like something an elderly neighbour might think to do if they heard raised voices and wanted to let him know that they knew (and give him a bit of a telling off)

Can you stop with the casual ageism please? No idea why you think that might be a factor.

BIWI · 12/01/2021 17:00

@SirVixofVixHall

I think elderly relative/acquaintance, possibly someone with mental health problems , or who simply forgot to enclose the rest of the missive

Ageism and disablism! FFS.

InFiveMins · 12/01/2021 17:06

I think it's from a religious group but not sure how they'd have your husbands name Confused I think if he were having an affair though the poem would allude to it more.

It's strange.

NoOneOwnsTheRainbow · 12/01/2021 17:08

No update yet?

Belinda554 · 12/01/2021 17:09

I have a photocopier, it’s a fancy printer, scanner etc etc.

RemarkableLemur · 12/01/2021 17:10

Very mysterious. I'm curious to hear what your DH thinks of it.

User4428 · 12/01/2021 17:10

@Bluesheep8

Ps. We open each other's post. We think nothing of it - usually. It's always junk or bills

I'd be furious if DP opened my post as a matter of course. As would he if I opened his. Why are you opening each others post in the first place? Isn't it illegal to open someone else's post?

You are exactly the sort of person I am thankful I don't have in my life. Frothing your self righteous poison for people who don't behave in exactly the same way as you do.

Jobsharenightmare · 12/01/2021 17:14

It is always strange to read the posts where people point out why something is not a problem because it wouldn't be to them, but is to OP, or suggests something is a problem when OP has said it is not. It is like some people can't think through the minds of others and can't escape their own frame of reference.

noteabagsleft · 12/01/2021 17:16

@Jobsharenightmare

Agree with this! So frustrating!! What a world it would be if we all had the same views or behaved the same way!

speakout · 12/01/2021 17:17

Isn't it illegal to open someone else's post?

Not if you have their permission.

I open OHs post.

TrixieTrouble · 12/01/2021 17:19

Hope you get to the bottom of it OP, it's quite sinister isn't it?

LST · 12/01/2021 17:20

I hope you find put OP

I open dps post because if I didnt it wouldn't get opened. He is literally pissing himself at the being illegal comments 🤣

Original poster
OnSilverStars · 12/01/2021 17:20

So. He came in and when I saw his face I felt instantly better because I do really trust him. He played with the kids and then I casually said oh. I forgot! You got this weird letter today. And I showed him. He looked at it and then looked at the back and inside the envelope and he's like, "what is this?" "What else was in it?"

I said nothing that was it. Weird huh.

He said what does it even mean? Who sent it? Asking all the usual questions. He just generally looked puzzled. I said I don't know. So strange isn't it?

I told him I googled it and it was an except from RLS called "on marriage". He's like that's so bizarre. Do you think it's been sent to me by mistake?

Then he said who doesn't just send a link or a screen shot? Who send a photocopy??

Then he said, "it's freaking me out a bit, it's seems really serial killer-y!"

"Who doesn't sign things or put a return address!?"

Then he said I'll read it properly and google it after the kids go to bed

Then he was like, "what if I get another one with something else in tomorrow?! What is I have a stalker" "who do we know in tyneside!?"

And then he helped me make dinner and feed the kids

He's freaked out by it more than anything.

He didn't look guilty at all

Definitely IS NOT JW! Just isn't. Doesn't make sense.

Well none of it makes sense.

If anything else happens I'll post it!

Sorry for the anticlimax BlushBlushBlush

OP posts:
Newfor2021 · 12/01/2021 17:21

How strange! Please do let us know OP, hope you find a reasonable explanation.

Jeremyironseverything · 12/01/2021 17:22

It's a bit obscure if it's from a jealous lover. I think I could find something a bit more relevant to marriage, if it's to put doubt in your mind.

florascotia2 · 12/01/2021 17:23

Very true BIWI

And anyway, as I and others have said, those quotes are not copied from a regular edition of RLS's work. They've been separated out, cut and pasted, and numbered.

RLS's text - have any of the posters here actually read it? - goes on to talk about the importance of 'Faith' in relationships. Now, RLS did not mean conventional religious faith ( he meant hope and trust) but ill-educated later readers from evangelising religious groups might mistakenly think he did. If they thought that, they might well overlook or not know about RLS's lifestyle.

JinglingHellsBells · 12/01/2021 17:23

@Jobsharenightmare

It is always strange to read the posts where people point out why something is not a problem because it wouldn't be to them, but is to OP, or suggests something is a problem when OP has said it is not. It is like some people can't think through the minds of others and can't escape their own frame of reference.
Sorry but I think it's beyond the pale to open someone's post even when you are married. It's like couples who have a 'joint' email account so they cease to exist as individuals, or who have the passwords for their partner's emails or phones. DH and I would not dream of any of those because for us, it's almost the last bastion of existing as an individual in a long partnership where so much is shared anyway. I get cards and other mail from women friends and I'd be furious if DH opened those and read them while I was out. Nothing private in them but they are addressed to me, not Mr and Mrs Bells.
CrotchBurn · 12/01/2021 17:25

I believe him. We need to get to the bottom of this though! I agree that a photocopy of a book rather than a screenshot or link makes this an older person, but not very old. I put the suspects age at around 70.

You will clearly now need to narrow your manhunt down by running a search for all libraries in Tyneside and calling them to find out if they have this book 🧐