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Original poster

It is one o clock in the morning, I need the night shift to mind my worries whilst I sleep....

995 replies

NaomiFromMilkShake · 17/12/2019 01:03

I am 50% of the way through chemo. (second time around)(different primary)

My DS (18) has just been diagnosed with depression I think me being diagnosed again was the tipping point.

Due to above I am having to delegate Christmas, it will get done, it did before just not my way.

DH retiring in three years, should be more than enough to live on, but at the moment I am worrying (Like I couldn't worry about that closer to the time) Hmm

Sausage rolls, my job, ditto mince pies.........if they don't happen my DH and my DS will suck it up. Just me worrying.

DS struggling in college and have to go to a meeting on Wednesday

So if some of the night shift would like to come and mind my ,worries whilst I attempt to sleep, it would be gratefully received.

Feel free to add your own, just writing that down has helped.

OP posts:
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QueenOfIce · 02/02/2020 01:49

My turn, can I hand over my cares for tonight, it's the anniversary of my lovely mums passing it's still quite new and although I'm ok I feel a bit wobbly and would like to sleep!

Thank you Smile

DramaAlpaca · 02/02/2020 01:53

I've got you QueenOfIce, get some sleep now.

Sorry about your mum Flowers

QueenOfIce · 02/02/2020 01:54

Thank you @DramaAlpaca I really appreciate it.

2018SoFarSoGreat · 02/02/2020 02:46

I will hold your worries tonight, @stressedsideways. You just cozy in and have a good sleep. Night night.

f00k · 02/02/2020 04:11

Gosh this thread has made me so emotional. What a wonderful, lovely thread. I'm wide awake. Should be 10 weeks pregnant with DC3 but found out on Friday that baby didn't make it past 5 weeks. Currently MC, lying on the sofa, pain is off and on. I worry about how I'll move forward from this. I know I will have to, but I'm heartbroken right now.

nuttymoon · 02/02/2020 04:20

@f00k I've got this, do try and sleep and I'll tuck your worries up on my soft pillow.

f00k · 02/02/2020 04:55

@nuttymoon thank you for listening and holding on to my worries Thanks going to try to sleep as much as I can.

nuttymoon · 02/02/2020 04:58

Thinking of you.
I'm worrying about somebody on another thread, I wish I hadn't read it, you know they say don't give more than you can, just reading the thread did that. Not you @f00k, I've got you Thanks

2018SoFarSoGreat · 02/02/2020 05:25

Don't worry @nuttymoon. You just rest too. I shall good that worry. It's OK. Sleep well.

NumbersStation · 02/02/2020 10:08

@nuttymoon

I read a thread the other day and I can’t get rid of the image. I won’t repeat as it is desperately upsetting. You feel what you feel. But sometimes I wish you could press an erase switch in your head and permanently forget things. Sad
I see @2018SoFarSoGreat had a hold of you last night so you were in good hands. I hope you managed a little sleep. Flowers

@f00k

I’ve walked a mile or two in your shoes. I wasn’t ever successful and it took me a while to accept.

You will always have 3 little ones. Just one will be looking over you instead of being by your side.

You will move forward when you are ready. We all find a way to do that. We don’t forget but we find our paths.

I’m so sorry that you are going through this. And you are ok to be heartbroken. Why wouldn’t you be?Our tests in this life aren’t always what we would choose.

I hope you can rest - today will be hard on you physically and emotionally. Be kind to yourself flower. Flowers

NumbersStation · 02/02/2020 10:10

I am working tonight and will be here to hold worries should anyone need. I may not be able to respond quickly but deposit them here and I will pick up when I can x

f00k · 02/02/2020 11:07

Thank you so much @NumbersStation for your kind words. Yesterday was physically and emotionally draining and it feels like today will be the same but I will be okay. I'm so sorry you have gone through this. Speaking with other MNers who have experienced a MC has helped immensely over the past two days. Your post was really lovely. MN has really pulled through for me this weekend. Thank you Thanks

NumbersStation · 02/02/2020 11:17

Bless you @f00k

I think sometimes my posts can read like cliches or platitudes. Rest assured they are heartfelt.

My little ones passed a long time ago now. As a consequence I always loved my animals a little too much (not that there is such a thing in my world) but I was so thankful for their presence.

You are walking a difficult road but I promise one day, sometimes sooner, sometimes later, that there will be sunshiney days ahead x

DramaAlpaca · 02/02/2020 14:47

f00k I'm so sorry for your loss Flowers

NumbersStation, I'd just like to say that your posts never sound like anything other than they are - heartfelt and caring. You come across as so kind and warm, it's lovely. A very unMumsnetty to you as well Smile

NumbersStation · 02/02/2020 15:18

Och I can be a horror too @DramaAlpaca. Blush

But here is a unmumsnetty hug back to prove that there is a little pink nice bit in this black wizened heart of mine Wink

I’ve lived through a lot as most of us have. What we can’t lose is hope for a better day. I’ve been that broken unsleepy person late at night. A brighter day has never failed (even if it has taken a while) to arrive yet. 🌈 ☀️

GenuineKlatchianPottery · 02/02/2020 23:12

I’m here if anyone needs their worries watching overnight. I promise not to lose them. The cat on the other hand likes to hide things...

stressedsideways · 03/02/2020 01:59

Ah these posts bought tears to my eyes. This has helped me so much the last two nights. I will take anyone's worries and keep them safe while they sleep tonight Flowers

JustMyName · 03/02/2020 02:10

What a lovely thread!

Can I post? My health anxiety is going a bit crazy. I've to call for the results from a blood test tomorrow. One of the things they tested was for diabetes, although I didn't know they would until I got there. I've just realised recently I've been very thirsty, like constantly, at night and having to wee a couple of times at night too, not like me. I've convinced myself it's diabetes type 2 and now can't switch off. Struggle anyway to sleep, so many worries at the moment and also painful shoulder so I can't get comfy. I've been reading for over an hour and really need to sleep Sad

joystir59 · 03/02/2020 02:12

Can someone look after 'my partner has tests all this week in preparation for chemo, and I'm really worried about her' I've got to be up early to drive her to hospital, I'd love to slerp

JustMyName · 03/02/2020 02:14

@f00k so sorry to hear that. Sending unmumsnetty hugs FlowersBrew

WhatAMum01 · 03/02/2020 02:20

I'll happily mind someones worries,I'd swap them too.can someone please take mine.
ive not slept properly in 5 years,a prayer my son goes to sleep after waking again for the rest of the night.
Hes 5,he has severe Autism and learning disabilities.
Hes complete non verbal and has no understanding.
My god I worry each night about how hard it is each day and how hard itll become in the future.
I worry my other kids will have childhoods defined by the limits of my sons disabilities
I worry that each day i wont make it past this year.its so physically and emotionally demanding.
I worry my husband and I will crack soon.
I worry that if my son never talks how will he ever tell me if anything bad happens.
I worry that I've not been a good enough person and am now paying for this by receiving this life long punishment of heartache.

Please someone hold my worries,please pray my son learns to sleep and talk,if only to tell me hes ok.

DramaAlpaca · 03/02/2020 02:46

Oh, just checked in and it's busy tonight. I'm on my way upstairs and I can take a load of worries up with me.

JustMyName sleep now. I've got those health anxieties for you until the morning. Try not to worry, if it's diabetes it's treatable. Don't fret Flowers

joystir59 that sounds tough. You need rest so you can be strong for her tomorrow. Sleep now while I mind those worries Flowers

WhatAMum01 worries about our children are so hard aren't they? You are a good person, no doubt about it. You want the best for your DS and your other children and it's so hard when you want to fix it but you can't. Stay strong, and I hope you and your DS get some sleep Flowers

NumbersStation · 03/02/2020 02:46

I will hold your worries. I pray you’ll get some sleep and that your son does too.

I wish I could wave a magic wand for you and make your wishes come true but magic wands are scarce. It won’t stop me hoping for you though.

I haven’t walked your road. It sounds hard but the fact that your worry is for your son and not you, makes me want to wrap you in the biggest hug.

It is what mums do. They love unconditionally and do their best when times and roads are hard.

I will hope upon hope that you get small victories until they soothe your head and get the breakthroughs you long for. You have done nothing wrong except maybe not thinking of yourself too.

Someone better than me will maybe be along to say the right things. I find it hard to get my point across sometimes.

I hope your wee lad finds his peace and you all find yours.

I’ve got you tonight flower and I hope I’m able to help you get a couple of hours Flowers x

NumbersStation · 03/02/2020 02:49

@joystir59 and @JustMyName

My goodness you are in good hands tonight with drama alpaca

Wishing you the rest you need Flowers

DramaAlpaca · 03/02/2020 03:05

Numbers we posted at the same time Smile Glad to have you here too to help me out tonight. I'm off to sleep, with worries stuffed firmly under my pillow. I'm glad to take on a few tbh, I'm worried about work tomorrow and this will distract me. Night all.