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Original poster

Next door are having a massive fight about google

363 replies

GingerFrogs · 28/09/2018 19:50

Screaming and shouting and swearing.

Something about "your not even fucking signed into google"

Walls are really thin.

What's the strangest fight you've heard?

OP posts:
pocketdoor · 30/09/2018 20:45

My neighbours had a blazing row because he was hoovering and she wanted to drink her cup of tea peacefully so she threw her tea on the floor and told him to ‘fucking Hoover that up then you prick

Oh god I chuckled for ages at this.

pocketdoor · 30/09/2018 20:46

And the takeaway couple. I love this thread!

AlpacaPicnic · 30/09/2018 20:50

I'm going to confess to following a couple of lads round the supermarket once because they were arguing so I could have a proper listen. They were arguing about the film Pearl Harbour. All I can really remember is one of them saying in a tone of utter frustration 'its just three hours of Ben Affleck being a complete prick'

CaptainCallisto · 30/09/2018 20:59

We used to live in a long terraced street just near York racecourse so had all the drunken race goers filing past on a fairly regular basis.
My favourite post-race moment was an argument getting steadily louder as they came up the street. He was drunk and whiny, she was furious!

"I'm sorry!"
"Don't talk to me"
"Babe, I said I'm sorry, come on..."
"I don't want to hear it"
"They said it was a dead cert!"
"I don't care if it was Red Rum reincarnated; it wasn't your fucking money!"

We could hear him begging and whining all the way down the street. We thought it was pretty much a dead cert that he'd be sleeping on the sofa Grin

IdahoJones · 30/09/2018 21:28

My old neighbours were very unlucky and she broke her leg and he broke his arm in separate beer-related accidents in the same week. Proper plaster casts.

We were treated to weeks of competitive fracture moaning and arguments about who should go and fetch the other one a drink, "you selfish cunt".

April2020mom · 30/09/2018 22:39

Once I listened to a argument. I happened to over hear part of the conversation. We were secretly recording it from our phone. It was about what her boss would say if she was caught stealing money from work. Their voices were so loud we heard everything by listening at the walls too. They never knew we knew.

81Byerley · 30/09/2018 23:27

Not an argument, but an overheard conversation:
"They don't want it now"
"Are they getting someone to kill it then?" Shock

EstuaryBird · 30/09/2018 23:39

My exh once went ballistic because I bought 2 loaves of bread - a small white and a small brown. We fought about this for ages although my side of the argument was 'it's just fucking bread' repeated every time I could get a word in. Anyway, he wound it up until he screamed 'all the famine in the world is because of you, you stupid spineless frog'...........at which point I couldn't argue any more because I was lying on the floor in a hysterical, uncontrollable fit of laughter. It never left him though and every time we rowed (mostly every day) he brought up that bloody bread.

IdahoJones · 30/09/2018 23:50

We were the ones arguing today in Tesco about carbs in pizza which ended up in me saying, 'oh fuck off, DP'.

I'd said, 'bloody hell there's a hundred grams of carbs in this small pizza!' and he said, 'oh that's pretty good, isn't it?'.

'Not calories, you berk.'

'I don't know what you're on about.'

The man's had a bloody pre-diabetes warning. We've been talking for weeks about fucking carbs and sugars.

Then we went to buy a gate at a hardware emporium. 'How wide is that gate?' I asked him, clearly referring to the vast raft of wood he was lugging to the car.

'Which gate?'

'That fucking gate you're carrying.'

'One thousand and nine.'

'What? Miles? Inches?'

And so it continued.

PrincessWire · 30/09/2018 23:53

Once had a blazing row on holiday because the DVD box set I'd ordered him for his birthday when we got home was the standard one and not the one with the extras.

After screaming at each other for about 15 minutes I, a person who barely ever swears, called him a "fucking selfish cunt" then threw myself on the bed and wailed "I'm so tired!" Not my finest hour...

abacucat · 30/09/2018 23:53

Heard next door arguing, which was very rare. Could not hear what they were saying except when she kept repeating very loudly to him - "You've really done it now John." Never did find out what John had done.

IdahoJones · 30/09/2018 23:56

Maybe John had bought the expensive crackers again

abacucat · 01/10/2018 00:25

idaho Grin

abacucat · 01/10/2018 00:29

My mum and gran rarely disagreed, but one thing they did not agree on was the Royal Family. My gran thought they were hard working and felt sorry for them, and my mum thought they had an easy life. Two memorable arguments on this theme were -

Gran - But the Queen works so hard. Just think of all the letters she has to open, read and answer.
Mum - She has staff for that! She doesn't do it herself.

Gran - I wouldn't want to live in Buckingham Palace, it would take so much cleaning. It would take ages to clean the windows alone!
Mum - The Queen doesn't clean the bloody windows.

You can tell there is a theme here. I just always used to laugh at these arguments.

Thighofrelief · 01/10/2018 00:37

EstuaryBird - but are you French even?

BalloonSlayer · 01/10/2018 07:16

One thousand and nine.'

'What? Miles? Inches?'

I can't even see the gate and can tell it's millimetres. Why did you think he needed to specify the unit of measurement? Grin

< revs up argument again >

OhDearGodLookAtThisMess · 01/10/2018 07:57

Millimetres? Don't you mean centimetres?

PlinkPlink · 01/10/2018 08:36

Surely not centimetres. That would make it ten metres wide 😂 has to be millimetres.

IdahoJones · 01/10/2018 08:44

I can't even see the gate and can tell it's millimetres. Why did you think he needed to specify the unit of measurement?

Well yes it was millimetres but this was the man who failed to tell the difference between carbs and calories minutes earlier because I 'hadn't been specific enough'. Anyway, he knows I work in centimetres. We were both tired. Grin

Juells · 01/10/2018 08:51

I happened to over hear part of the conversation. We were secretly recording it from our phone. It was about what her boss would say if she was caught stealing money from work. Their voices were so loud we heard everything by listening at the walls too. They never knew we knew.

I think that's stretching 'happened to overhear' to breaking point.

Maeb · 01/10/2018 11:18

BIL arguing with me that icing sugar is sweeter than granulated sugar. I tried to tell him that it they are exactly the same but one is more finely ground. But nope I was in the wrong.

MyFamilyAndOtherAnimals1 · 01/10/2018 11:18

... I know I've been really annoyed at my dh for typing www.google.com into the Google address bar. ... (he still does it and it still annoys me!) Blush

thatmustbenigelwiththebrie · 01/10/2018 12:16

DP and I once had a big fight about whether I would be capable of throwing a spear at a moving lion. he thought my aim would be too bad, I thought I could if I needed to and was hungry.

SylvesterTheCat · 01/10/2018 12:24

@MyFamilyAndOtherAnimals1 my DH does that too!!!! Envy

pocketdoor · 01/10/2018 13:13

Me and my dh have had many an argument about how long he takes to do a poo.

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