Embarrassed by boyfriend

[DogDmor]

Been seeing someone for around 3 months. We get in we'll but he's quirky, which is fine - well I thought it was. Sometimes I'm starting to think he's just plain odd.

He's overweight and said he wanted to get fitter so I suggested he come along to my karate class. He did and I ended up mortified. He wore scruffy old jogging suit bottoms with paint on them and a massive baggy t-shirt with Harry Potter on. Whenever instructor showed him something he giggled. Instructor is hard arse, old school - I've known him for years and knew he was going to react badly. After 3 or so giggling moments and DB stood in weird positions and flapping his arms around like a little girl instructor said "what are you giggling at? Are you a girl or what? Do you have something wrong with you?". Everyone was looking. DB started stuttering and instructor carried on with "you know this is karate and not ballet don't you? Are you in the wrong class?". DBs face went bright red. I was mortified and just wanted to hide. Another female instructor said "alright, it's his first day" so instructor said "but what's he giggling at?". Anyway later on instructor came over to me and said "where the hell did you find him? Is he one of your patients or something?" I was so embarrassed I just said "he's a neighbour".

After the class I asked DB why he kept laughing. I'd warned him beforehand about the instructor. He replied "it was funny, I thought I looked silly!" So I said "you did, why did you act like that? It's a class full of martial artists, nobody else was acting like that" do he looked embarrassed and said "I don't know" so I said he shouldn't come again as instructor will have it in for him now. He got upset and said "but I like spending time with you" so I snapped and farted and said "well you embarrassed me, I've been going there for years and now I don't want to go back because of you, find your own hobby".

Anyway this isn't an isolated incident, a couple of weeks ago he embarrassed me in a cafe shouting and making a scene. In private we get on really well but in private he mortifies me.

He still wants to come to karate with me tonight. AIBU to tell him I don't want him there?

Good grief I actually cannot stop laughing! This is the first time I have agreed with everyone else that it is just so bloody funny! I assume it is simply 500 comments about snapping and farting

OP do you really mean you got cross and therefore farted as a indication of how pissed off you were?

I have an image in my head now of that Catherine Tate sketch where she plays the woman outraged at how people are behaving and then she drops one that goes on for about 10 seconds!

OP I’m sorry to hear you “snarted” due to your DP’s behaviour. Hope he meets your exacting standards at tonight’s class.

The thread that inspired a thousand usernames - you genius, OP

**Hey, I wonder if any world leaders have tried this tactic?

Trump. It's all in the name.

martial farts - if only for that alone this thread must go into classics. It's the way she said "snapped and farted" like it was the most obvious thing in the world, happens every day, we all do it. Utterly hilarious, lovely harmless puerile fun.

I can see why this has tickled the MN funny bone. But OP you don't seem to see the funny side of this.

Why Why Why are you making the poor man return to the class again? How long will he have to pretend to be your neighbour.

Of course he couldn't do the same movements as experienced people. Very unreasonable to expect him to.

Instructor is an arse, even the other instructor had to intevene. I hope he doesn't bully your BF again.

You sound so worried about what other people think of him and you are not very kind about it. Have you ever talked to him about what it is that embarrasses you?

Ah, this thread is a masterpiece

Snapped and farted! That's up there with the post about urinating on a chair.

Is your instructor John Kreese by any chance OP?

Oh my goodness this thread is glorious, it's made day 4 of chicken pox hell not so awful.

Snapped and farted, seriously haha.

Snapped and farted 😂 Brilliant!

I don't know what you should do about your DP, but in future you should probably try not to snap and fart in the company of others 😳😂.
Work on that.

You sound horrible. Why didn't you stick up for him when the instructor was embarrassing him???
It was probably nervous laughter.
Poor guy, trying to lose weight and get himself healthy and all you can do is make fun of the clothes he's wearing to do it. Were you dressed like a supermodel??
What an awful person you are! Bully!!!!!

Vote for Classics?

There are one of two scenarios here:

1. The poster is a fart troll who just chucked it casually in there for kicks
2. she has IBS and has left the thread mortified now hundreds of people are laughing at her I feel a teeeensy bit bad. Sorry , op (unless you are a troll)

What’s a fart troll now?

The instructor sounds like a sexist t**t. And your boyfriend deserves so much better than you.

Had to come back for another read

Someone please link to trex thread that was another one that had me pissing myself

*We’ve all done it, had a fury fart. It’s ok.

I've never done a fury fart, but this thread has given me such huge belly laughs I've farted twice.*

I'm ugly crying with laughter 😂😂 (and farting, not furiously though)

My dp just asked if after your snap and fart you rage and poo?

This is similar to that lady who urinated on the chair, anyone remember that one?

farted=crime=dumped. also. op youre being really mean.hes overweight-he wore joggies(paints irrelevant,coulda wore leotard!..and despite the twat style instructor(is insulting really etiquette old school or not)humiliating him he was willing to go back. i dont think you are obliged to continue to see the guy...but youre nort being very nice

I’m so sorry Alan.

That was my mum! It's my favourite family memory

Snapped and farted is just wonderful.