Awkward moments caused entirely due to that British politeness embarrassment thing

[Piglet208]

I was recently having a meal in a hotel in France with Dh. After the main course, the lovely waiter ( he looked like Manuel from Fawlty towers) came over with the menu and said something in French about dessert. I speak some French but didn't catch the whole sentence so I nodded and went to take the menu. He pulled the menu away, smiled and said something else which I didn't catch. We assumed that he thought we didn't want dessert and decided to leave it as the restaurant was extremely busy. Suddenly Manuel triumphantly appeared with two desserts and handed a creme brûlée to Dh and a chocolate tart to me. Now obviously we should have got his attention and explained we hadn't ordered dessert but my embarrassment at having to try to explain in French and to be honest the fact that the desserts looked lovely led to Dh suggesting we just eat them. As we started to eat Dh noticed that the group of waiters were having a serious discussion and looking over worriedly at us. Manuel was beginning to sweat and it was obvious that we had someone else's dessert. So the whole time we continued to eat the desserts ( they were lovely) the entire restaurant staff were heatedly gesticulating and glaring while Manuel got more and more sheepish. After a while identical desserts were brought out to a table close by and eventually Manuel shuffled over to our table and asked Dh to sign for the desserts, avoiding any eye contact or mention of the mistake, which he obviously did much to Manuel's relief. I can't help thinking that Manuel must think we were slightly strange to accept 2 rogue desserts and eat them without saying anything!

Are there any other irish people on this thread because I don't think I've any British blood in me but would certainly do all the things mentioned here.
Out to lunch recently with a friend, I deliberately between two wrap fillings, ordered one. Waiter brought the other. But obviously I just ate it, and in order not to make my friend feel awkward I lied when she commented that she thought I'd ordered the other one.

I totally forgot about my son, he is quite androgynous looking (he's almost 2) and has a name which pronounced one way is male and another female. I often get asked her name, reply and then they pronounce it the female way and carry on talking about my pretty little girl. I often do not correct them and sometimes even pronounce it the same way. I am unsure if the one person who pronounces it the female way and sees me on a regular basis has any idea he is a boy..

Irish blood in me, but have some British traits too! However, I have learned over the years to be a bit more assertive when it comes to bad grub in restaurants. It's not easy but if you are discreet and kind it can work beautifully.

If something is truly awful, or not cooked well enough, or cold or whatever, when the wait staff come over and say "how is your meal", I say, hi I was just wondering if you could help me here, I just think to me the meat is tough, undercooked, cold whatever, and it just isn't what I expected when I ordered. Thanks so much, or something like that. No big hoo ha, it always works. And a big tip to the wait staff if they sort it out. I got over myself years ago, but would never be THAT attention seeking person looking for the impossible either.

Google translate is your friend when abroad in a country where you don't speak the lingo. Has saved me from some horrible meals!

But I would never ever criticise a dinner party meal that someone has gone to great trouble about. If it is not something I like, I just say "small portion for me please" and stock up on the accompaniments!

I've also learned to push into a Q abroad. When in Rome and all that.

But there are times when I won't make any comment, usually if it would embarrass those around me or even a stranger. I can't think of an example right now, but if I remember I'll let you know! We all do it if we have any emotional intelligence!

There must be other nations out there like this? We can't be the only ones who are so barkingly awkward about little things like getting a name wrong??*

Not as far as I'm aware.
Just you.

It sounds utterly mad to me, but I am not culturally English.

Strange ah well, makes me proud in an odd sort of way.

The least embarrassment is if both sides keep up the pretence even when it becomes obvious there was a misunderstanding. Discomfort, weeing in sinks, eating disgusting food ... these are all as nothing to the English (and I agree it is English not British) when the alternative is embarrassment.

I'm always astonished by American TV or films where one character gets another's name wrong and they say "actually it's not Steve but Geoff". Like WTAF how unrealistic is that dialogue?! He's Steve now forever.

There's a lovely man at church. His role is to greet people and hand out Mass books. He is really lovely and greets DS and DD2 by name and asks after DD1 (again by name) - she's away at uni and greets DH by name when he comes to church at Easter and Christmas. However, he calls me Louise. My name isn't Louise and I feel that after 15 years of answering to Louise (pretty much every week) I haven't got the heart to correct him.

Q. E. D. there Mrs H

Yes Louise, you should have nipped it in the bud at the start, but I know your name is really Thelma. lol

Another wee one.
Years ago was invited with my DM and her friend to stay in an acquaintance's apartment in Paris. Didn't realise acquaintance's mother and dog would be also staying in living area which made getting to the loo difficult during the night without waking acquaintance's frosty DM and her very yappy dog. First night, we were woken up by the sound of running water which turned out to be my DM taking an pee. She had somehow emptied out a vase of flowers and was quickly filling it. To the brim. She was desperate.

I went to a yoga class and the instructor misheard my name (think Lesley rather than Louise) and rather than correct her, I answered to Lesley. A few months later (!!) someone who knew me joined the class. The instructor heard her call me Louise and asked me what my name was. When I answered Louise, she asked me why I hadn't told her. I just smiled and said I considered Lesley to be my yoga name.......

We moved to our house 4 years ago, 15 miles from where we used to live.

DH has a face that seems to get more 'hellos' than usual, so wasn't too odd how many people took kindly to him. Wasn't until someone asked him about an injury did we realise that loads of people thought he played rugby in the local towns reasonably decent rugby team.

Too British to correct them, and they have all been to British to do anything apart from carry on with chatting to us about various rugby games.

This is why deed poll was invented. Surely it's just less painful all round to change your name officially to Thelma and Louise (remember that film?) than it is to correct them. If you explain to all your English family/friends why they'll be totally on board too and wonder why you didn't do it sooner.

A friend was staying with another friend on holiday. When he went to bed a pigeon flew in yhrought yhe open window. He couldn't get it out, didnt want to wake other friend so spent the night with the bird in his room.

Too many to mention. But today's example - I paid £24 for 2 products which were very clearly labelled £7.00 each because I was too polite/embarrassed/chicken to query it! My DH thinks I'm insane.

A waitress in Greece accidentally tipped a glass of red wine over me, she was mortified so I apologized profusely to her.

I was once at a food market looking for somewhere to stop and buy lunch when suddenly someone who was selling food in a near by stall asked me to try the food they were cooking , I asked what it was and they told me however I didn't hear them and couldn't bring myself to ask them again! So I decided to just try it because what could the worst happen?! ... turns out it was a very fishy fish and resulted in me trying my absolute best not to gag and heave in front of the poor people stood proudly watching me try their food and I couldn't bring myself to say I didn't like it / no Thankyou ... I ended up very quickly spending £8 on the fishy dish to then rushing around the corner to put it in the bin gagging and looking for a drink 😂

My dds first trip to local shops without me. Eagerly awaited their return.

Me "did you meet anyone you knew?"
Dd1 "well we saw x" (nice school mum both dds know)
Me "did you say hello"
Dd1 "no we hid behind a van"

Social skills a work in progress...

Ginmakesitallok

Omg that's so something I would do!

These stories are utterly bizarre and I say this as an Irish person who gets themselves into more awkward situations than most people I know.

I'd never tell a hairdresser that I hate my hair but I would 'annoy' anyone if I needed a pee and they were in my way.

My fave story is the car-bus-stop one. Poor wee terrified old man. Bonkers English people.

When me and my husband were trying to get pregnant we went into a pram shop just for a look. Anyway we were approached by assistant who started asking loads of questions of what we were looking for. So i obliged and described the pram i would like. Next question was when my due date was. Rather than admit i wasn't actually pregnant yet i named a date that a woman at my work was due on! Husbands face was a picture

Needless to say when I actually did fall pregnant a year later I was to embarrassed to go back there to buy my pram

I'm always doing this stuff, probably the most torturous one was when I saw an advert for a tandem in the local co-op. I'd wanted to buy a tandem for me and my then partner to ride for aaaages and this was really cheap so I phoned up, made an appt and turned up to the address they gave me. Was utterly baffled when the couple AND their two kids brought me into the very empty living room and brought in a smart looking kids double buggy thing in a sort of 'ta-da!' way, assuring me how carefully they had treated it, how clean it was, what a great help it had been to them with kids so close together etc. Reality dawned on me as they looked at my confused face and started asking me curiously if it was for my own kids. I had none & knew nothing about babies or toddlers in anywhere near enough detail for the situation. On the other hand I was new to the area, hadn't started my job yet so was worrying I might turn up to find their (older) kids sat in my classroom on day one and they looked skint as fuck and were obviously really pleased that I had come as a potential buyer for this thing. I was scared to let them down so I told them it was a GREAT buggy, just PERFECT and I desperately made up a 'friend' who had two young kids but couldn't get out of the house that day so had sent me to check it out for her, they asked me how old the kids were because 'look, we are selling some other stuff she might like' (cue more ta-da moments) and in a panic now I said something ridiculous like 12 months and 18months which drew some furrowed brows. I was sweating like a maniac as I had to invent more and more answers to their increasingly suspicious questions, no my imaginary friend couldn't come back tomorrow to view it because she couldn't drive, now she also had a crappy husband who was funny about her meeting strangers and she wasn't allowed to come out, one of the kids had chicken pox etc etc. I conspicuously studied every aspect of the bloody thing and wrote notes down and promised them I would go see my 'friend' straight away so she could call them to reserve it. It took me aboit twenty minutes to escape by which time I think they were starting to be quite worried about my sanity and probably thought I was scoping out their belongings for a burglary or something.

So no, thankfully I didn't go so far as to buy the fecking thing. Still feel guilty and very very stupid thoigh.

I was referred to as Louise by a teacher in my secondary school. She had previously taught me English for a year so really should have known my name wasn't Louise, but there you go!
In my defence, she was trying to get my attention from the other side of the library and was getting cross that I was apparently ignoring her. I was too scared to respond sensibly when she barked "Don't you know your own name?" really loudly at me.
One of my friends asked me why she called me Louise. I had no idea.

DH once waited over an hour for dessert in a restaurant. I was rather un British about it and wanted to get up and just leave. Especially as the waitress acted as if we were an inconvenience for asking what was going on.
Dh just kept muttering that he wanted his pudding.

I have a Parking AND Politeness one...

The other day I was on my driveway having just pulled in and was having little think before going into the house. A lady then pulled in over my driveway, she was waiting to pick up her friend from over the road (they don't have drives)

I opened the car door and the driver waved very apologetically and started scrabbling around for her keys, clearly thinking I was waiting to leave and getting out to ask her to move.

I was too embarrassed to say "It's ok, take your time I was just randomly sitting on my driveway not going anywhere" so I waited, let her search getting increasingly frantic then eventually helped her look for her keys the whole time accepting her apologies. They had slid down under the mat.

She then moved her car and I felt obliged to actually go somewhere. So I pulled away and was going to go down to the roundabout and turn and come back when I realised she was following me with her friend who'd arrived. I then had to appear as though I was actually going to a real place and ended up on the single A road out of town, with them following me, with nowhere except farm track for a few miles to turn around in. I pulled into a garden centre where they of course pulled in. We then had such a laugh about the coincidence of both going to the same place...

I came home with a bag of gravel and a shrub that I only peripherally needed, two hours later than I'd planned.

Now that neighbour over the road knows that I'm "getting into gardening" she is coming over this week with some cuttings for me

Disclaimer: I am Scottish, and as such the the chats with random people, acquaintances and their pets are not something I feel the need to or can avoid!