Someone has nicked my username!

[QueenMortificado]

Name changed to this off the back of another thread a few weeks ago where I used the word Mortificado and my previous name had had Queen in it

Today I see someone else is now registered as TheQueenMortificado.

Wtf. It's myyyyy name. Aren't there rules around plagiarism like this???

TQM if you see this come forward and explain yourself!

What? Who? I wasn't asleep again.

Where the blazes did our tennis court just go?

Not you, Young Pretender
You're the real Pretender, we all know that. Not that fakey 2kids Total faker.

But I will have that lovely rat, and look, I brought some Communion Whisky!

But wait!

2dogs is the Faux Pretender!

I'm the REAL PRETENDER.

To whom were you referring, Sister?

(Damn we're a confusing lot)

Xpost for the win.

Give me that! Respect your elders!

Won't somebody think of the children

Behave in the presence of Holy Sister of the Biscuit! HEEEEATHEN

Now look, the two of you. If we're going to get sloshed on communion whisky, we have to do it properly.

POPE!
Thank Tea and all the Biscuits you're here!
Grandpa is a Royal Zombie. I have thrown Holy Tea at him and bashed him with the Blessed Biscuit Barrel, but no dice. He's still roaming.
How, in the name of Rich Tea do we stop him?

SisterMortificado

Peace my child. Calm your agitated soul with the balm of generic religion and a blessed biscuit.

Fear is the product of your imagination. Grandpa Mortificado is not a heathen zombie; he has emerged from a prolonged diabetic coma.

Fortunately for us all constitutional law decrees once there has been the coronation of a son, the crown has passed on. Rather like Grandpa Mortificado or so we thought. He has no legal claim to the throne and by all accounts he'll be dead soon anyway.

Here, have a wafer.

In the name of the FatherMortificado, the SonMortificado and the Holy Mortificado, God bless you my child SisterMortificado.

Perhaps you would like to join me in the Vatican Wine cellars where I am plotting to ensure Cardinal Mortificado will surely be the next Pope after I have gone to our Great Father Mortificado in the Sky?

You Toerag! Faux-YoungPretender! Offering tasty B-B-Q-ed rats from MY barbecue!

We all know that SisterMortificado would flash her holy knickers for a gobful of rat, with or without Communion Whisky. Calls herself a Holy Sister!

By the Sacred Knucklebones of StMortificado the Insufficiently Continent, I swear that when I get my throne back (MY Throne, plebs! - I am the True Pretender!) I will buy a dragon with my CofferMunny, that is so Big and Scaley and Ferocious that yu will all regret your impertinence.

()

Jailer! JAILER!!!!! Let me out NOW! Do You Know Who I Am !?!?!?!?!?

And get a broom and sweep up these spiders' legs. This place is disgusting!

HoneyDragon I

'll have you know that there is a special section in hell for those who use the word Cuntweasels in the presence of the Bishop of Rome, the Vicar of Christ and the Mortificado's representative on earth.

I'm a dragon. I'm literally Hell Proof.

Most Holy and Biscuity PopeMortificado

Thank you for your wise words.
I shall join you in the Vatican Wine cellars, post haste! May I bring a friend? YoungPretenderMortificado has proven to be a true and honest soul, quite good at plots and handy with a barbeque.

YOOOOOUUUU HEEEEEATHEN 2kids!
BLASPHEMY!

My Holy Knickers are both too holy and too voluminous for any wandering body parts to invade, you hell-bound out-of-wedlock!
I use them solely to contain my Sisterparts and a bottle of Communion Whisky for any unfortunate souls.

Oh FFS.

C'mon 2Kids, honestly at this rate they'll lock all the posters on here away for not being Mortificado.

handy with a barbeque.

I HATE YOU ALL!!!!!

That's MY barbecue - it blew into my garden after a stiff breeze one evening!

I shall have all of you, PopeMontificado, SisterMortificado and FAUX-YoungPretenderMortificado - I shall have all of you excommunicated for your romps of Unholy Troilism in the Cellars of The Vatican.

It will curdle the wine!

I have almost finished training my Fearsome Army of Rats! Soon I shall be able to push them through the hole I have made with my eyebrow tweezers and they will swarm across the land like a - er, a Fearsome Army of Rats.

(BTW - thank you, *ZombieGrandpaMortificado for providing those internal organs which you no longer required, for me to use as training treats for the rats. There will be a Place of Great Importance for you in my Court when I regain my Rightful Kingdom!)

HoneyDragon!

At last - there will be a Place of Even Greater Importance for you. Although you are but an Humungous Reptile - probably of the Crocodilian Persuasion - you have shown yourself more worthy than any Mortificadonian.

Arise Sir/Lady HoneyDragon.

(Any chance you could get the garden furniture back? There's a rat in it for you.)

Let them have their dungeon.
We have Holy Whisky, Holy Biscuits and Holy Wine

Mummy, Daddy, the castles being overrun by peasants and their beastly pets. What do we do?

What happens when you forget you've name changed and accidently post some really profound or funny message and everyone thinks it's me

This is reeeeeally unlikely in my case, to be fair.

Think Of Us

Doesn't matter whether you signed for it or not. As a Member of the Great Army of The Undead you have no legal rights anyway.

You can't train rats without entrails, everybody knows that.

I shall have all of you excommunicated for your romps of Unholy Troilism in the Cellars of The Vatican.

I think you'll find I'm exclusively in charge of excommunication. And . .. oh... looky look .. by Papal Mortificado Decree I hereby excommunicate 2kids2dogsnosense from the Church of Mortificado.

SisterMortificado you may not bring YoungPretenderMortificado to the Vatican Wine Cellars. That was an invitation only to you. You must come alone.

Only the true Mortificados are allowed to sup with the Pope; we'll be 'avin no Pretenders here thank you.