Things you only learned about pregnancy and birth once you were committed

[BestZebbie]

Inspired by the thread about giving women more information about natural birth.... What happened to you/ your friends during pregnancy and birth that came as a total surprise?
I'll start with:
Temporary deafness in late pregnancy (probably fluid related, like swollen ankles)
Arthritis post-pregnancy, apparently triggered by it
Pains when the placenta implanted (meaning that I thought it was all going wrong)

I had carpal tunnel in both wrists during and post pregnancy - so bad I thought I would drop the baby as my wrists would just give way, had to have an operation on the worst wrist. Fx it doesn't happen again with current pregnancy!

Labour hurts more than you could ever imagine even with an epidural

The stomach not going back to normal anything like as quickly as I expected.

Blocked nose while pregnant

Waters not breaking naturally - this always happens on TV/films

Nosebleeds like a running tap with no prior warning in first pregnancy. Never had one before or since

Going from 3cm to 1cm after a sweep. Ffs

You bleed for weeks afterwards. It doesn't all just come out at the same time.

Carpal tunnel

Unborn babies don't read birth plans- therefore don't know what's expected of them.

That as well as 'morning' sickness, there's also 'morning' diahorrea.

The headache of pre-eclampsia is awful. Ditto the swelling; I've never not recognised my own body before but it was absolutely bizarre.

That not everyone poos during labour. I was so worried about pooing, I held one in for an hour. Turned out I was 10cm dilated and had been holding in DD's head (that was so bloody uncomfortable and painful!)

Having waters broken was nowhere near as invasive/painful as expected. Literally just crochet hook in your hooha followed by a flood of Biblical proportions.

Morning sickness is all-day-and-all-night sickness.

Pelvic pain. Completely unacceptable levels of pain that you are just meant to cope with for months on end.

Pregnancy insomnia.

Amt of vaginal discharge esp in trimester 3

Did i mention pelvic pain

I'm with the poster re the pelvic pain not being able to walk for months on end

That DH was Over 10 pounds at birth and his brother nearly 11 😨

That afterwards, even if you don't have weight to lose due to joyous pregnancy sickness, you will not be the same shape for EVER!

Poo-ing during labour. Even with early labour diarrhoea, I just know I shit myself at some point each time.

And no matter how slim I am now, I have a band of saggy stretch marks forever...

That milk actually shoots out of your nipples. I hit the wall in Costa Coffee with breastmilk while trying to latch dd!
Also the bloody night sweats. Slightly bad third trimester, niagra falls from every pore post labour!

God, the bleeding! I remember walking to the en-suite bathroom in the delivery room after having DD2 and looking back to see a trail of blood with my own footprints in it. It looked like the Texas Chainsaw Massacre...
Also that I could moo like a cow during labour, and that so many medical folk would be elbow-deep up my fanjo trying to break waters, or put a clip on the baby's head, or check to see if I'd torn 'right the way through'!!!
That the tea and toast they bring you after is really the food of the gods.

I second the pelvic and back pain. Was 6 weeks postnatal before it stopped feeling like my body would literally collapse in a pile.

The amount I had to pee for the first few days postnatal. Epic huge amounts!

How much guilt you feel about everything.

How bone crushingly tired I would be.

How much I would struggle and fail at breastfeeding.

How tender the stitches can be for the first week. I couldn't decide which was more painful, being driven into hospital in labour or being driven home the next day with stitches!

How much more in love I fell with my partner.

I forgot - I didn't know about hospital grade electric breast pumps, having only encountered the single cup hand operated ones at NCT (so that you could tap off a quick bottle for your husband to give your instinctively breastfed baby if you felt you needed to pop out to a lentil-weaving class shortly after the birth).
This meant I was quite freaked out by the rhythmic sounds from the next bed in the postnatal ward and was feverishly imagining a newborn baby in some kind of wheezing iron lung and wondering why it wasn't being looked after more intensively in a special ward.

That your waters breaking doesn't necessarily mean you're in labour... I had no idea.
My community MW informed me my waters would 'top themselves up' and if nothing continued to happen I could go home, luckily contractions started after two days in hospital.

That you can have a premature baby for no apparent reason (see above).

Pelvic pain in pregnancy.

The sickening pain of pgp/spd when you try to go upstairs.
How after avoiding even paracetamol for 9 months you can have the really good drugs when trying to push a baby out of your fanjo
That although stitches hurt, they hurt even more if they're infected and it's not a sign of weakness to ask somebody to check them
That the best way to wee after an epidural wears off is to put your hand under the running cold tap and wooosh off you go. Especially if you've gained 10kg in fluid retention

Furry belly.

Horrible feel like dying morning sickness
Asthma during pregnancy
Complete and utter exhaustion after birth
Vagina completely ruined
Sleep deprivation was a complete killer
Motherhood was exhausting

I had far too much saliva. I dribbled from the corner of my mouth if I wasn't careful.

During my first birth (I think when DS was crowning) I almost had an orgasm. I told no one because it seemed far too bizarre. It was only after talking to a friend, who is a earth-mother type doula, I found out that it does actually happen to some

I also had this strange type of rash on the back of both hands during each pregnancy. It looked like burst blood vessels. I have no idea what that was about either.

Apart from those unusual things I loved being pregnant and giving birth.

Afterpains. The ones with DS1 weren't so bad, but after DS2..... proper contraction like pain there. It completely took me by surprise.

The birth really not being that bad or painful at all and the after bit being so fucking painful and debilitating.