Things you only learned about pregnancy and birth once you were committed

[BestZebbie]

Inspired by the thread about giving women more information about natural birth.... What happened to you/ your friends during pregnancy and birth that came as a total surprise?
I'll start with:
Temporary deafness in late pregnancy (probably fluid related, like swollen ankles)
Arthritis post-pregnancy, apparently triggered by it
Pains when the placenta implanted (meaning that I thought it was all going wrong)

That my ribs would move and not go back. I have a load of nice dresses that fit around the boobs and waist again now I've lost most of the baby weight but won't do up over my rib cage!

Baby getting hiccups three or four times a day,

Every hiccup I had a drop of pee come out!

I ended up wearing adult nappies!! Really glamorous

How tired the 1st trimester made me.
That 'morning sickness' can be 24 hours a day and lasts months.
Rhinitis
Worse sleep in the 3rd trimester than with a newborn!
Milk let down can be really painful (like someone twanging elastic bands on my nipples!).

I had easy pregnancies and relatively easy births although ds was posterior and my labours did little and then went from standing starts to 10cm within less than an hour.

That midwives could be so rude and so vulgar and the community ones at home were the worst.

That if you are worried about anything you need to refer it to a doctor straight away.

That childbirth is a mere right of passage to prepare you for the agony of breastfeeding. Nobody told me that breast feeds could last for two hours and you just breast fed for six weeks. Mastitis, thrush of the inner breast tissues, cracked and bleeding nipples. And the pressure applied by hcps and the guilt to make you carry on. I didn't mention the breast abscess.

how much I would cry in the days after giving birth (day 4 the worst
?!) 'baby blues' it was horrendous. I was in hospital and couldn't say the word home without sobbing...

I feel that this thread should a) be in classics, but more importantly b) be included in the sex ed programme in every secondary school in the country. It's terrifying!

Night sweats
PGP
Constant nausea
Insomnia
Extra saliva

The sweaty, milky smell when you've spent a day breastfeeding twins and you are sure that everyone else can smell it!

Bleeding gums.

"omfg your teeth are bleeding"

'Morning sickness' lasting almost the entire pregnancy. The midwife kept telling me it would stop soon...nope.

That it is possible to have a very fast first labour and that faster does not equal better!

The amount of blood that came out afterwards. Like, golf balls.

Breastfeeding thirst. My mouth was like a desert!

That post natal depression can happen even if you are so happy to have a baby and nothing is really bad in your life at all.

That pnd can actually be treated effectively and then when you get better you wonder what the hell you were thinking!

The furry tummy
The constant worry
The wind that doesn't smell like your own
How you really, really don't care who gets to see your fanjo when you are in labour

That sometimes babies die before they are born and that sadly this is more common than I ever thought possible. It's rarely talked about but I really wish I had been more aware of this

That it is perfectly possible to wet yourself while vomiting.
And that tena direct deliver next day in plain packaging

SPD isn't necessarily 'just a bit of hip pain'. You can end up disabled by it, using a wheelchair because you've lost the ability to walk or drive. Oh and you might as well forget about standing up as well

And ignore everyone's perceptions after birth of the whole 'you've got a baby now everything is wonderful and perfect' thing. If anything isn't right tell someone.

That labour can, if you're a bit weird like me, result in a near or full-on orgasm.

It's not a myth.

That prolapses can happen quite easily, even 2 weeks after the birth. Quick smart with those pelvic floor exercises ladies, even with stitches. Ouch.

Oohmavis were you on any pain relief when that happened? G&A?

No completely sober

It happened in both of my labours. I'm due DC3 in four weeks and will be mightily disappointed if it doesn't happen again.

That some midwives are very, very cruel and will bully, belittle and assault you when you are at your most vulnerable.

That this is considered appropriate.

That if you challenge them you will be treated like a massive drama queen / shit mother.

(I will qualify this by saying some are absolute wonders and I'm sure the job is terribly stressful. But having someone penetrate me with a rod and break my waters when I'm shouting 'no, stop, please' and my husband tells her 'can't you hear her saying stop, stop this right now' but feels he can't physically intervene as he'll likely get arrested, isn't something that will leave me.)

SPD is really painful, I was worse at standing up after sitting too long than my pre-knee-op arthritic DM.

That everyone has advice for you about every single thing.

You can just bleed during pregnancy, it doesn't always mean the worse (not easy after 4 miscarriages to realise that).

That even with a section you still bleed afterwards - why don't they just suck it all out?!

That 'morning' sickness is not like any other sickness. It's like you don't get a warning it's just - 'quick, to the sink, barf'. And doing it in the street is a needs must situation! And sometimes you wee at the same time!

And if you've had your gallbladder out and an empty stomach it gives you very yellow bile sick. That's fun.

Emma's Diary is really annoying. And the Bounty pack is full of useless crap.

Finally, not everyone feels let down in your boobs and not everyone feels full etc... it doesn't mean the baby is starving! Mine just feel the same as they did and I can't feel the milk at all (and I've been bf now for 23 months!).

oohmovis wow! There aren't many women who give birth without some form of pain relief. I wonder whether it's so rare because of that? And if women didn't take pain relief, then they would feel an orgasm too? Fascinating!

I took G&A but felt really out of control with it. Next time I don't want to take it (how I'll manage with the pain I don't know!)

SPD by far.

I had no idea about it.

You will vomit in the street at least once. Normally on your commute.

Sweeps. I had lots and they're pretty traumatic.

You can withdraw consent for anything at anytime.

And YY to pnd being treatable. It gets better.

PGP for me too. I was unable to work for such a long time and spent my days on my own watching tv bored senseless and in pain trying to move about.

After birth, the joy that it had gone for it to return worse than ever a day later. Now 5 weeks on and I've had to stop breastfeeding to be able to take strong drugs and my mum is now looking after my little one until I'm able to do more. It's heartbreaking. I feel like a failure and miss my boy so much. I'm scared to have him back in case he's forgotten me as at the moment he's only really hearing my voice.

I am starting to improve but I just don't know when the pain will be gone and I can bend down to pick him up.

I'd go through the labour again if it meant not having this.

jusdethat is absolutely dreadful, so sorry that happened to you :(