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AIBU to want to talk to my 14yo about where this pill came from?

152 replies

WorriedofMiltonKeynes · 19/04/2016 12:16

(Name changed) This morning, when doing my usual domestic goddess routine (I've, trying to shove as much crap from around the house into cupboards etc) I found a tablet under a cushion on a chair we have on the landing. Didn't look like it'd been deliberately hidden, at best, just almost dropped there so when I moved the cushion, I saw it.

Long story short, it seems like a street drug. It's roughly pressed, into a triangle and it's half pink, half white, with a triangle pattern on the white side. No drug number/company etc. Have checked on line and with pharmacist friend who doesn't recognise it either.
I have three kids, DS14, DS8 and DD5. The eldest is a good kid, doing well at school, sporty and engaged with school. Bit temperamental at home, sulky, messy, glued to phone... Nothing novel I would say.

Would like to talk to him about this pill, but AIBU? It certainly belongs to no one else in the house, but I have no evidence it belongs to him either (or without testing, that it really is MDMA or whatever). It doesn't seem to have been deliberately hidden, in fact, it's in a public place outside his sister's room - why do that if you're hiding something? So I do have doubts that it's his, but who else's, as he hasn't had friends around recently.

I don't want to be accusatory or confrontational but just ask calmly what, if anything, he can tell me. I want to give him every chance to come clean if necessary, but use it as a chance to talk about it, while also reminding him that his dad and I are in lines of work that regard drug use as a MASSIVE, pension losing deal.

I experimented with drugs at college and don't want to get preachy, but I feel it should be addressed. I thought I'd like to calmly talk about it, then throw in some contact numbers like Frank. Let him call if or when he wants to...whether or not he admits to it being his.

Am I being too weak? I feel that unless I have more evidence, I have to be careful not to alienate... Anyone have any experience of things such as this?

OP posts:
peggyundercrackers · 19/04/2016 13:02

lick it, go on you know you want to? whats the worst that can happen?

the kids will come home to you raving with some glow sticks, a bandana on and a smiley Tshirt.

MrsMac2014 · 19/04/2016 13:02

That hacks me off that sweets are being made to look like drugs. Or more likely that the drugs are being made to look like sweets.

edwardsmum11 · 19/04/2016 13:03

Peggy she's already licked the funky sweet

MrsMac2014 · 19/04/2016 13:03

Sorry, meant to say worriedof MK - glad your panic is over.

WorriedofMiltonKeynes · 19/04/2016 13:08

peggy This is what's left and I have no desire to put KLF on the stereo and go raving in the back garden with the chickens and ducks. Ah well. You really do live and learn.

AIBU to want to talk to my 14yo about where this pill came from?
OP posts:
MrsEricBana · 19/04/2016 13:08

Grin Grin This is a learn for all of us!

MrsEricBana · 19/04/2016 13:10

(Apart from enb76 obv, who is now Mumsnet Potentially Illegal Substances Guru)

TheEmmaDilemma · 19/04/2016 13:11

Ha! That's excellent.

TheSpottedZebra · 19/04/2016 13:11

What kind of jobs can mandate random drug testing - pilots?

MimsyBorogroves · 19/04/2016 13:12

Well, let that be a lesson to us all. LICK IT FIRST.

acasualobserver · 19/04/2016 13:12

OP, save this thread - there might be a day when your son finds it pretty funny.

19909ninty · 19/04/2016 13:15

Lots of jobs now do random drug testing

TheSpottedZebra · 19/04/2016 13:17

Do they, 19909? Like what? Not being arsey by the way, just curious.

WorriedofMiltonKeynes · 19/04/2016 13:20

All I can say is that I'm so glad I posted! I'd been googling the thing, but I think I'd just got it in my head that it was A Bad Thing.

Oh the relief....

OP posts:
19909ninty · 19/04/2016 13:21

These are who I know of so far: J Murphy solutions staff, jaguar landrover staff, northern rail staff ( I think this depends on your department though) air traffic controllers, pilots like you said, there's a couple of law firms in Liverpool that do now. I know one funeral directors that does (shocked me) some dental nurses are also drug tested now.

I've heard of junior doctors and student medics getting drug tested although I haven't yet! It might just be a rumour to scare people.

WorriedofMiltonKeynes · 19/04/2016 13:21

thespottedzebra think quite a few need RDT. Like military for example.... Wink

OP posts:
TheSpottedZebra · 19/04/2016 13:24

Well I never! Thanks for replies. I am now much better informed Grin

icanteven · 19/04/2016 13:26

This thread is amazing.

(We were paying £10 for a pill in Dublin 15 years ago, btw, none of these £3 a pop glories for us!)

Alasalas2 · 19/04/2016 13:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WonderingAspie · 19/04/2016 13:29

Thank goodness you asked on here before confronting your DS!! Grin

horseygeorgie · 19/04/2016 13:32

Fantastic! You have to tell your DS!

hairygodmother · 19/04/2016 13:33

Worried, I'm glad you've put your mind at rest. But I just want to say that it is for threads like these that I love MN. You guys are awesome.

Ladycrazycat · 19/04/2016 13:34

spottedzebra I worked in a bar while at uni around 2002. They did random drug tests there although I was only ever present when they had the police come in with dogs. They made us all stand in a line and they walked up and down. The dog stopped in front of me and one other slightly older (by about two or three years) manager! Shock Blush

I was so shocked (so was everyone else as I was shy and slightly socially awkward so no one expected it). I was 18 and hadn't encountered drugs until university and at this stage, only cannabis which I had tried but wasn't too keen on so didn't really bother with it preferring alcohol. I did however live in a halls of residence where basically everyone smoked cannabis and was around it constantly.

I knew I hadn't done anything wrong as I hadn't smoked it so was quite happy to speak to the police saying that no I didn't have drugs on me and no I hadn't taken drugs but I lived in student halls where almost everyone around me smoked constantly. The police were happy with that. The slightly older manager looked terrified and basically mumbled that he was the same, everyone he lived with did loads of drugs. He looked so scared and didn't sound too convincing at all! I think he was quite relieved that I spoke first!

LurkingHusband · 19/04/2016 13:34

Lots of jobs now do random drug testing

Judges, MPs, policeman, local councillors.

Oops. Sorry. Those are jobs that aren't randomly tested.

whois · 19/04/2016 13:35

This is super funny!