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AIBU re this odd request from neighbours?

485 replies

yorkshapudding · 02/08/2015 16:51

Our NDN's came over to tell us that they are having some work done in their back garden starting tomorrow- having a fence built, some trees cut down, rubbish cleared etc. They estimate it will be about two full days work, possibly more. They then told us that they were going away and would not be back until after the job has finished. They explained that they don't want to leave the workmen a key for "security reasons" so this means they will have no power source to plug tools in, no access to a bathroom or kettle etc. so would we be in and if so would we mind 'helping out' with those things.

I explained that DH will be at work and while I am actually off work for the next couple of days, I will have various errands, things to do, want to take DC out etc. so will be in and out of the house. They then asked when I was planning on going out so they could let their workmen know and saying "oh don't worry, they'll work around you". I told them that I hadn't made firm plans and didn't know when I would be going out. To be honest I don't really want to be tied to a schedule and I also don't like the idea of three strange men traipsing around my house for two days. I told them that I was sorry but they needed to either provide them with a key or arrange for the work to be done at a time when they would be home as we couldn't be on hand for two days to provide cups of tea, electricity and access to bathroom facilities etc.

Although they were polite, I got the distinct feeling that NDN's thought I was being mean and not very neighbourly.

AIBU or is it a bit much to expect me to accommodate all this? Initially I thought they were being cheeky (they don't want to leave these men a key but I should just open my house up to them!) and that it was a bit of a strange request but due to their reaction (they seemed quite surprised that I said no) I'm now doubting myself. They are generally quite annoying neighbours, nothing too awful just a bit noisy and inconsiderate at times, so I don't trust myself to be objective!

OP posts:
scatterthenuns · 02/08/2015 16:52

YANBU! How odd of her.

sooperdooper · 02/08/2015 16:53

Cheeky buggers! You were completely right to say no, for all the reasons you've already said!

ImperialBlether · 02/08/2015 16:53

Well, I think you're incredibly selfish not using your holiday to help your neighbours!


Meow75 · 02/08/2015 16:53

Wow, you seem to have a serious case of "My neighbours are entitled muppets syndrome".
Are you familiar with it?!?!

VitaminCrumpet · 02/08/2015 16:54

YANBU! Cheeky feckers. It's not your problem they are going away. They sound very entitled.

Metacentric · 02/08/2015 16:54

Say no. Their circus, their monkeys. Why should you have you loo roll, teabags and electricity used? Why should you help at all? They are trying it on.

IAmAShitHotLawyer · 02/08/2015 16:55

YABU - we are supposed to help our neighbours.

The above was my initial thought.

However, I re-read your thread and I thought, who arranges for workmen to come to the house knowing they need access to electricity and then goes away for two days?

So I changed my mine and now think YANBU.

Hope that helps

MissDemelzaCarne · 02/08/2015 16:55

Cheeky beggars! Shock

Andylion · 02/08/2015 16:55

Do not doubt yourself, YANBU. As you have said yourself, they don't want to deal with these workers but are annoyed that you won't? (Providing them cups of tea and access to your bathroom, FFS?)

CruCru · 02/08/2015 16:55

Ha ha, so basically they want you to manage their workmen for them? They're having a laaarrrrf.

crustsaway · 02/08/2015 16:55


Its their garden and their responsibility.

Im in the cheeky selfish neighbour camp.

expatinscotland · 02/08/2015 16:57

Your neighbours are dickheads. I'd have told them no, too. Use your power for their work? For that reason alone they are pisstaking arseholes. YANBU.

If the workmen rock up tomorrow, tell them you told the NDN's NO. Don't be walked over.

VitaminCrumpet · 02/08/2015 16:58

I have a solution. The NDN can give YOU a key and you can lock up every night Grin

SideOrderofChips · 02/08/2015 16:59

They want to use YOUR electric for THEIR workmen?!

And water, sewage etc...


yorkshapudding · 02/08/2015 17:02

Thank you all. My first instinct was that they were taking the piss. I just wanted to make sure as I admit that, because I don't particularly like them, I have previously gotten my knickers in a twist about quite minor things that they've done. I guess on this ocassion my twisty knickers are justified Grin

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 02/08/2015 17:02

I wouldn't have told them I was off work, either. Grow a backbone with these people. Fast.

LIZS · 02/08/2015 17:04

Yanbu. Even our notso d ndn left the guy who has done their patio while they are away access to electricity, running water etc. He did bring a flask though so presumably no kettle etc. Shame they didn't have the courtesy to let us know he might be coming and using our drive for access but all in all not nearly as much of an imposition as your ndns are expecting.

StillStayingClassySanDiego · 02/08/2015 17:04

Yes tell them that you're unable to help on account of not being fucking walk overs with doormat written on your forehead .

Are they dim?

MammaTJ · 02/08/2015 17:06

My first instinct was that they were taking the piss

Entirely correct!

Tizwailor · 02/08/2015 17:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Collaborate · 02/08/2015 17:06

If they ask again, just practice this:
"Oh I'm sorry, but I'm just not comfortable assuming a responsibility for other people's building works."

SilverBirchWithout · 02/08/2015 17:07

Your response was spot on. What cheeky beggars your NDNs are.

It is perfectly reasonable to not want to plan your days around their builders needs.

IamtheDevilsAvocado · 02/08/2015 17:08

Entitled muppet syndrome. Their circus their monkeysGrinGrin

It's nice being neighbourly- but they are not..and you dont like them....

So why should you help them out at considerable inconvenience to yourself?

No you're not bu!!

suitsyou · 02/08/2015 17:12

YABU. I bet you won't help with the erection of the fence either will you?

VitaminCrumpet · 02/08/2015 17:14

I bet the builders turn up tomorrow, as the NDN have said you would be in.

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