Parental kindnesses you recall...

[retiredgoth2]

When I was about 10, I'd been out playing with friends. And had had an argument the substance of which escapes me 20 30 ok 37 years later.

Came home in tears. This was unusual. Mum figured she couldn't make things better, but plainly so wanted to.

So she went to the Music Centre and put on a record (I don't recall her ever doing this ever in any other circumstance). It was my Wurzels LP. Which I loved. She was just trying to do something that made me happy..

Anyone else have comparable memories? I really hope in X years my kids will have their own versions...

A disclaimer.

I'm out in Covent Garden, and two drinks down, and inclined to mawkish reminiscence...

my dad bought me a car when i was a teenager, he went to a car auction with his friend who knew about cars. and i was ungrateful and cried because i didn't like it, it was a muddy green vauxhall nova and quite ugly and uncool in my spoilt eyes. it was actually a great car and lasted me ages. still feel bad now, what a brat, he was so hurt but didn't show it :(

then once at a family party, i was about 20, my dad was walking me round introducing me to family members who hadnt seen me for years, and he was so proud of me and kept saying to people, isn't she beautiful, she's like a little fairy i was never confident about my looks and to hear my dad brimming with pride about me was so sweet i will never forget it :)

when i was 25 i got married for the first time. and dad and i travelled to the wedding in the wedding car. i am sure my dad knew i had doubts and he said to me, in a really tactful, kind way, we can just turn around and cancel the whole thing if you like? he made me feel like he would make it all be ok if i did that. (i didn't though!) still feel bad for that as well as my parents spent 1000s on that bloody wedding and i didnt even wanna get married

and then when that marriage ended, less than a year later, and i had a tiny baby by then (ds) my parents were so kind to me. they helped with DS, paid my rent till my benefits were sorted, drove me places, took me food shopping and had me and DS over to eat most nights as we were so skint.

Aw, this is making me tear up.. I lost my mum earlier this year and miss her every day.

One thing that sticks out is the lovely things Mum and Dad brought me after a traumatic birth with DD: other people brought flowers, generic meals to heat up and that sort of thing - which was very nice.
My parents brought an outfit for DD, an enormous bar of chocolate and a large, complex book on Russian history for me. It sounds odd but it was a great reminder that I still had an identity at a time I needed it.

Dad was and is a typical 'gruff Northerner' but I always remember his rendition of Just So Stories when I read them to DD. He spent some time working abroad when I was a child and used to write long and entertaining letters to me from meetings.

Mum and I had a great tradition of putting stockings together for each other, Dad and DH at Christmas - which often involved sneaking past each other in the corridor at three in the morning. Great times.

what a lovely thread, we have moved it to Classics now.
Thanks OP.

This is a beautiful thread :)

My parents are lovely too.

I always had a home-baked birthday cake (sometimes helped to make them) of the shaped and sweetie-decorated variety, train, hedgehog, pirate hat, fairy castle etc.

I was sung to (and now sing the same songs to DS) and told made up stories (Sammy the Seagull, and some about a family of fieldmice with a hedgehog who lived the the hedgerow, sometimes a half-remembered and half-made up fairy tale that were much better than the book version.)

They were especially kind during my many follies of teenagerhood which I will be repaying for many years. I must have put them through hell and they were very lenient now I look back. I deemed them desperately uncool but they let me have friends (including boyfriends!) to stay a lot and as long as I came home on time i was allowed to do pretty much what I wanted.

They paid for a lot of my University, making up what loans allowed to agree with what someone from a low-income household got for nothing. They also did this for my brother and it must have cost a fortune, never mind the top-ups when we were skint, and paying off my overdraft. They never made a big deal of it but I know sometimes it was hard to find the money.

I'll always remember my birthday lunch box which I used to always look forward to, my mum would buy me the corner yogurts, nice crisps & other goodies I didn't normally have with a note wishing me happy birthday :)

She used to make my meals in the shape of a face for me & my bros.

When she was working a night shift she would always rent us a film out.

She would always let me & my bros join her in her room at night after her & my dad split up because we liked to be together :)

During the summer holidays when I was about 6 or 7, we'd been out in the garden playing. I got up after bedtime because I had a sore bit on my hand - it must have been the day before we went away on hols, as I can remember I was only wearing knickers to sleep in (mum liked to get as much laundry as possible done before we went, so my jammies were in the wash ). I had a thorn in my hand and it was really deep. My dad got a sharp needle to dig it out. Once the thorn was out, I remember him letting me sit down on the sofa with him and watch a bit of telly and 'help' him eat his supper to make me feel better (it was a banana sandwich on white bread with lots of butter...).

My mum taught at my primary school, and one day I was not feeling very well. Suddenly, I needed to be sick, and rushed to the sink in the corridor whereupon I vomited profusely. I can still remember the feeling of relief as I felt my mum's hands gently pulling back my hair and her voice telling my I'd be OK and not to cry. Sometimes it was great having your mum teach at your school (though most of the time it was not so good). She also remembers this incident, but her feeling of gratitude was to the other teacher who silently handed her a big box of tissues and some disinfectant

I always remember this one:

My mum and I were on holiday at the seaside somewhere in the UK. Think I was about 8 or 9 and into Sindy in a big way, I had a huge collection. I was looking at the Sindy display in a toy shop and saw a Sindy writing desk/bureau thing that I loved. It was about £8 which was a lot of money in those days. I was just about to talk to my mum about saving up my pocket money/putting it on my birthday list, when she said she'd buy it for me there and then! 'You're on holiday' was her justification for a treat

Remembered another one - boiling hot summer's day and my mum was really cross about the state of my room. She set me to it, being very specific in what she wanted done/tidied in my room. Only about 15 minutes later when I was nowhere near finished she came upstairs and said I should come down and finish it later. There was a funny film on tv she thought I would like and she gave me a bowl of ice cream to eat while I was watching it

Lovely stories
I remember my mum was often quiet vocal about telling us off when we were naughty - I used to leg it to my dad who always had a clean hankie on hand to dab tears.
We lived overseas and I also have very clear memories of my dad tucking us in everynight and trying to get us to learn the Arabic numbers by kissing forehead (one - wahid), left cheek (two - ithnain) etc etc up to ten, we loved it.
My mum was the most brilliant story teller and poem recaller, she often inserted our names into the poems of heroic deeds and getting the better of witches and bears!

oooh, just rememberd how brilliant my mum was at children's parties - we always had a birthdays at home with about 20 children. She organised the really traditional games without fail, baked/decorated very imaginative cakes (once I asked for a ladybird!) and never seemed phased by masses of overexcited children!

• Plomino

Oh dear, crying my eyes out here.

Fat pony your not Kate Midds are you????

Everything I remember about my Mum is lovely! I lost her when I was ten so I'm really lucky to have such good memories, all cuddles and kisses and smiles and so much love.

If I can give my son half the happiness she gave me I'll be doing a good job.

This is such a lovely thread, I've been in tears reading it!

My parents have always had to scrimp, save and make do. When I was nearly 3 my mum was pregnant with my little sister and they wanted me, as a former only child, to not feel too left out. My dad found some old school desks in a skip, took them apart and used the lids to make me the most beautiful dolls cradle. He painted it red and painted a love heart and flowers on the end. My mum made beautiful white bedding and my gran crocheted blankets for it. It was the best present I ever had and I played with it for years and years, along with my little sister.

Now my dd is about to turn 3 so I brought my cradle out of the loft and have just re-painted it and given it to her and she loves it so much. Painting it myself made me appreciate even better the love that went into it first time around. My dad and I don't always see eye to eye but my dd's little cradle is a reminder of how much he loves me

My memories are; when we were ill Mum used to run us a bath, a cool one if we had a temp with lots of lovely bubbles. While we soaked she'd make the bed with clean sheets & pillowcases, & give us her spare pillows so we had a lovely big "nest".

I remember her washing my hair & gently drying it with her dryer & then helping me back into that clean cool bed. Then she'd bring me a big bowl of Heinz Tomato Soup with slabs of white bread & butter from a fresh loaf. Still my go to comfort food even now!

I once asked her who was her favourite child (one of four, & sibling rivalry was intense) She thought for amoment and said,

"I don't have favourite's , I love you all the same, but I give my attention a little more to whichever one of you needs it most at that time"

Dad- being so proud when I got married, we arrived at the church a little early as I'd allowed extra time when booking the car for the London traffic forgetting it was quieter on a Saturday. Guests were still arriving so the driver kindly took us on a tour of the City & we waved to all the tourists around The Tower & other spots as we passed feeling like royalty! it was a warm day & he nodded off & I had to wake him when we were near the church,those last few quit moments alone with him were very special.

God this hay fever is affecting my eyes..............snuffle

Aged 10 and being bullied at school, I injured my arm and needed weekly Physio at the local hospital. Mum would sneak me out for a coke and biscuit stop afterwards (before returning slowly to school) it was our cheeky little secret and it did me the power of good!

Oh lordy missmarples the lovely clean bed and the last alone moments with your dad in the car....I feel like bawling my eyes out but have a meeting to go to.

My dad is a sociopath. I appreciated everything my mum did for me/us.

I remember the time when we were poor and she saved all her money up for ages to buy me the pink shell suit that I really wanted.

Every morning she would wake me up by singing 'sunshine on my shoulders'

Every Friday evening we would watch TV and do face packs

When I was mentally ill she picked me up every day so I could be with her

Even now I class her as my best friend. We speak at least twice a day on the phone. I can tell her anything and she will never judge me or make me feel bad. There is nothing I can't tell her. She is my rock and I know I am hers too.

I was very spoilt as a child and got everything I needed and wanted. When I finished my a levels my mum dashedhome in the middle of the day to ggive me a pack of m and ms and a magazine. It was such a little thing but I was so touched

Zero memories of my own parents doing anything nice ...but do in-laws count?
I have never ever forgotten, when my marriage almost broke down in the early years, my MIL sitting across from me at the kitchen table taking my hands and telling me that if it wasn't right then I should call it a day ....not do as she had done, and waste years of life trying to appease them.
I had never had that level of support from anyone, and it was her son that I was talking about leaving!

30 years later, when the whole damn thing went down the tubes anyway, I really really wished I had listened to her.

Oh yes and my dad traiking here there and everywhere when I was a teenager to pick me up and drop me off.
Actually both my parents have made sure I know I ca alwas rely on them and if I need them theyll drop everything.

My parents always made us feel loved and as though our opinions were important (but not without challenge!).

I remember them always treating us to something at the end of the summer holidays and taking us out for dinner on the first day of Autumn term.

My mum is the most selfless person without being a martyr. She always came up with great games for us to play and art project for us to do.

My dad told someone that if we weren't already his children, he'd love to have us as friends. That means so much to me as he is a wonderful man.

Such a lovely thread. I'm in tears reading through all the lovely memories. Particularly poignant for me as its my dad 5 year anniversary of his death tomorrow. He was taken suddenly from us in a car accident. Miss him every day. But he has left me with such good morals and always made me feel confident and proud. He did such funny things and was such a lovely character.

My fondest memory is how he surprised me and my brother with a trip to France. It was a total surprise and made me and my brother so happy. Apart from that, it was the little things like putting us to bed, buying us a bag of chocolate on pay day....aww I do miss him. I just wished he got to meet my DD and it saddens me that my DD will never meet her grandfather. I'm all sad now....