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Parental kindnesses you recall...

224 replies

retiredgoth2 · 16/07/2013 20:39

When I was about 10, I'd been out playing with friends. And had had an argument the substance of which escapes me 20 30 ok 37 years later.

Came home in tears. This was unusual. Mum figured she couldn't make things better, but plainly so wanted to.

So she went to the Music Centre and put on a record (I don't recall her ever doing this ever in any other circumstance). It was my Wurzels LP. Which I loved. She was just trying to do something that made me happy..

Anyone else have comparable memories? I really hope in X years my kids will have their own versions...

A disclaimer.

I'm out in Covent Garden, and two drinks down, and inclined to mawkish reminiscence...

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SupermansBigRedPants · 16/07/2013 22:02

Not smug at all goth my mum still isn't great but she's still trying my patience she's a whole lot easier now we're both adults though!

It's lovely to see the 'other' side too :)

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MissTapestry · 16/07/2013 22:24

This will probably out me but here goes...
I was in a physical fight with a boy at secondary school. Year 8 I think. I didn't start it, he just jumped on me Hmm
I told DM when I got home and her response was to find out his address (god knows how!) and sign him up to receive loads of junk mail about erectile dysfunction and Viagra!!
Cheered me right up and I still PMSL thinking about it!

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MorrisZapp · 16/07/2013 22:35

We were permanently skint throughout my childhood, my parents weren't great with money. I remember once my mum had received one shitty letter too many and she lost it. She said 'right! That's it! I will not live like this! Get your jackets on kids, (eyesweep of room, to include my sisters random and bemused friend) we are going out for tea!'.

And we did. To the local Chinese, where we had a slap up meal. Bonkers really, but fun at the time.

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BOF · 16/07/2013 22:42

Plomino, that is officially Heartwarming Story Of The Week!

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AmyFarrahFowlerCooper · 16/07/2013 22:42

plomino that made me cry

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ShatnersBassoon · 16/07/2013 22:49

Dad took me to the hairdresser against my mum's wishes throughout my teens, just to give me the chance to look normal ie not have one long plait down to the floor. He must have got a real earbashing from mum, but he thought it was worth it to make me happy.

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whippetwoman · 16/07/2013 22:57

When I was aged 9 - 10 we lived in America for a year. I hated going to school there as the children teased me about my accent all the time and I felt really lonely at school. I used to have to catch the school bus each morning for a long ride which I also hated.

One morning I managed to accidentally miss the bus so I had to go back home. My mum said she'd have to drive me in so we set off but on the way we passed the shopping mall and we went there instead and had a lovely day out and I remember my mum buying me new clothes. In fact I remember it all very clearly.

NB: I hated American education so much I turned down the chance to study there as part of my degree and was one of about 3 people out of over 60 who didn't go! I do like Americans though, no offence intended.

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BabyStone · 17/07/2013 06:23

Just remembered, my grandad would buy me a Where's Wally magazine every week and the binder it came with. Each week was about a different country/era of time, including trivia/facts, stickers, puzzles etc and I must've collected them for a good few years because I had about 5-6 binders full. He also taught me how to do my shoe laces Grin

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Pancakeflipper · 17/07/2013 06:30

Spiderlight, that makes me cry. And that you still have your enamel brooch - oh wailing and sobbing now.

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purrpurr · 17/07/2013 06:36

This thread is lovely

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littlemslazybones · 17/07/2013 06:52

Every time we went for a day trip somewhere nice I'd get travel sick and vomit on my clothes and backup clothes too. A good proportion of photos from my childhood are of me flopping about in my Dad's enormous warm jumper and my Dad shivering in a t-shirt.

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retiredgoth2 · 17/07/2013 17:34

Thank you all- lovely stories indeed.

Let's hope our children have comparable memories when they look back as adults.

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ErrorError · 17/07/2013 17:47

My DM used to buy me and my DSis a bag of midget gems as a reward for every time we went to the doctors.

When I failed my first driving test, Mum dropped everything and took me out for fried egg on toast and even let me cry in the cafe and didn't look at all embarrassed by me.

When My DSis got dumped in her first year of uni, she took it quite badly and wasn't eating or coping well at all, he was her first love. My DM travelled on 4 trains to stay with her for a few days, got her some shopping and comforted her. She even missed my birthday because of it, but had left me a lovely postcard. I didn't mind because she had to give her love where the need was greatest.

Before I could drive and had to take a 40 minute bus ride to and from work every day, my Dad would come and meet me at the bus stop so I didn't have to walk home by myself in the dark. He also made my sandwiches every morning and I'd never asked him to. He did the same for my DSis too.

Both my parents are two of the most generous and selfless people I know. I should tell them this more!

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GogoGobo · 17/07/2013 17:52

My mum knitted a whole wardrobe of clothes for my Teddybear despite hating knitting! I really remember starting infant school and had a poo accident and she was so kind about it, no tutting or disapproval, just discreetly sorted it.

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TheMagicKeyCanFuckOff · 17/07/2013 17:58

My mum once sat me down and told her she loved me more than anything in the world and hugged me and cried.

Every time I saw her (mediation- I was in foster care. I think she really did love me, but was a drug addict and neglected me and was also mentally ill and out of control) she would give me a diary entry from her pregnancy with me. I'd take it home and read it with my foster mum and cry a lot, and there'd always be a special note with it and a chocolate or something.

She was a bad mum. Abusive, neglectful, addicted and a terrible parent. I was in care for three years and I shouldn't have been sent back. But she had some lovely moments which I will always treasure. Part of me hates her, and out of 18 years I can list the good moments off the top of my head, but there WERE good moments.

Once, when I was 14 (and living with her full time), my dog was run over. I was devastated. Life was still shit with my mum and a new baby and bad school stuff. She hugged me and comforted me and on my birthday, she gave me a surprise. I was sure it was a dog. There'd been so many hints about it. I was absolutely CERTAIN. So, my mum, looking all excited, revealed a....bicycle pump. My bike was unused as the tires were deflated and we hadn't ever got round to do anything and stuff. I cried. Buckets and buckets. When she told me that I'd better hop on it and go down to X's house (a few streets down) and she'd come with me, and she would wheel the bike back. Y'know- cycling with a kitten isn't safe, is it? I cried, buckets and buckets once again. It was lovely.

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Mhw02 · 17/07/2013 18:03

Not from childhood, this happened as an adult actually. I had just moved to a new city, hundreds of miles away from my family when something horrible happened (don't want to say what, but it was a big deal for me). I phoned my dad and was in a real state on the phone. I just wanted to talk things through, and it was about 8pm at this point. After spending a few minutes calming me down, he got straight in the car and drove for 4 hours so he could be with me. He hates driving in the dark.

Another thing, which isn't exactly a kindness, but always makes me think how awesome my dad is...when I was about 3 or 4 I got my head stuck in the railings at the local park. Proper cast iron railings and I couldn't get my head out. There was no faffing about telephoning the fire brigade from my dad; he just grabbed the railings and pulled them apart. Panic over! I reminded him of this years later when mum was watching Eastenders and one of children got their head stuck in railings, and big supposedly tough guy Phil Mitchell had to 'phone the fire brigade.

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TroublesomeEx · 17/07/2013 18:11

My dad used to make up stories about two characters called Erkum Derkum and Baccarapalegs when we were camping. At least I think that's how they were spelt, I never saw them written down.

They had all sorts of crazy adventures, namely the sort of things that my brother and I had got up to during the day but with a slightly odd twist on them. We didn't ever realise why they had done the same as us, we were just amazed that they had!

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fashionlover76 · 17/07/2013 18:11

We lived with my grandparents and my sweet grandpa used to sneak Kitkats up to us when we had friends for a sleepover. He was usually the silent grumpy type, so it was extra kind of him.

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threestars · 17/07/2013 18:50

Sparkling, my grandmother did that - we used to call her Sunshine Nanny!

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Lizzabadger · 17/07/2013 18:52

My dad used to make up stories for us about naked people who lived in the garden, till we were quite old! One time the story incorporated a poo sandwich, to our great delight!

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TroublesomeEx · 17/07/2013 18:53

Baccarapalegs didn't ever eat a poo sandwich!! Shock

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MiauMau · 17/07/2013 18:58

Although my mum had two to three jobs throughout my childhood, when we were together we were truly together. She taught me how to knit, sew, embroider, crochet etc, etc so that even though she couldn't afford to buy me toys, I always had something special to play with... (Feeling teary eyed now....)

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thegreylady · 17/07/2013 19:02

My parents made me feel loved and special every day of their lives :)
eg Every Christmas Eve Dad would sneak out into the back garden with two toy bells.Mum would take me to my bedroom window to 'listen to the sleigh-bells'.
The 'fairies' left me little presents under the rhubarb leaves.
When I was grown up my Mum saved every half crown she took on her market stall and saved them in bisuit tins till there was enough for my first car.
She flew out to Sierra Leone on her own to be with me when dc was born.
My dad was an invalid [MS] and didn't work after I was 11 and Mum worked at two jobs to see that I never went without anything at my poshish Girls' Grammar School.
I hope I was half the parent they were.History repeated itself when dh2 my children's father also had MS!

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madmomma · 17/07/2013 19:11

My Dad would never, ever let me go to bed without a story. And he would read until he was hoarse, then make a cup of tea and read some more. He was endlessly tolerant of me and my friends trashing his house and taking over when we were teenagers. Used to step over our sleeping bodies all over his house without waking us to get to work.

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loopydoo · 17/07/2013 19:19

In the summer when I couldn't sleep (about 6/7), my parents used to let me come down and eat their supper without my younger sister. I loved it and it felt so special.

Also, if my dad was working Saturdays, my mum would shout and tell me and my sister to go and get in her bed and we would do impressions (she did a great Zippy from Rainbow) and she'd make us laugh with silliness. She was quite a strict mum who stood for no nonsense but I really remember those little times she was with us just messing about/letting us stay up late etc.

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