Thickos on TripAdvisor

[bupcakesandcunting]

I usually check reviews about places on Trip Advisor before booking a holiday. I've been having a snoop round this morning for a holiday and went onto Trip Advisor to read the reviews and honestly, some of them look like they've been written by a bear mashing his paws into the keyboard and hitting "send"...

AIBU to disregard reviews by people who moan that "nobode understand ENGLISH" "no chips/salad just greek food" "wayter rude" or should I be giving them the same attention as the others?

I have just found a review called "my mom died in this hotel"

She had a heart attack due to the lack of air conditioning.

I've just looked at reviews for a place I stayed in Rome (Rome, note, with all the pizzas and what not)
"close to all the attractions. MacDonalds is just down the Lane opposite"

Oh Goody - I love this thread! Trip Advisor is one of my favourite places to laugh at stupid ranting people.

Here's a good one about a total pigsty in Bulgaria:

'The girl behind the reception was very cheeky and could speck hardly no English....we all got cloths stole from three rooms.'

I am doing no work at all today. Found another one from a place we went to in 2006 (which was pretty basic, agreed, but was very cheap) This review is HUGE, takes up the whole page, but some of it is fantastic:

"Next ...oh there's more.... the outside snack bar was closed for two
days thereby depriving me and my family of the option to sit in the
open air and get what sunshine we could whilst having a snack.....after
all it's all incusive !!!
All inclusive of nothing means nothing and so I am paying good hard
earned money to get NOTHING!!............You will agree!!

The place needs more security and more enforcement of good behaviour.
This place is a breeding ground for ASBO WANNABEES!!!

This is my complaint.
I have already been in touch with Travel Watchdog and will be contacting Which Travel.
I await your reply .

(I'm not sure what she thinks TripAdvisor is? Maybe she should have addressed her complaint to her holiday company.)

I ought to point out - in my last post the lady is complaining that she was "paying good hard earned money to get nothing" etc.....There were 3 snack bars and 3 restaurants in the complex, so if one had closed she could have, umm, gone to another one?

"Fucking Spanish food eating Spanish Spain bastards in Spain."

THIS is why I love Mumsnet.

More from the Manc Reviewer of Jasmine Beach (in Turkey)

"The best food was the beach cafe which serves english food like pizza n chips burgers etc as the main buffet at the evening is shockingly awful."

Why do these people leave Britain for vaycay if they hate forrin places and food so much?

Reminds me of a friend of my mom's who was UBER English and went on vacation to Rome. His response was "it was great - the hotel served English food"

and ".If you are seriously thinking bout this hotel be prepared to be woken up at 5AM BY THE MOSQUE ACROSS THE WAY PRAYING!!!!!!!!!!they dont tell you this in the brochure but praying starts early and is constant throught out the day lasting about 10 min per time belting out through the hugespeakers"

Imagine. A call to prayer in a predominantly Muslim country. Whatever next?

Oh FFS another one (I can't tear myself away ):

you cud of died waitin for a lift, felt sorry for the less fortnate, who where in wheelchairs and cudnt use the stairs, the queues at the bars were rediculus, i think we gave up after day 4, we booked two rooms and asked to be put together weeks before we left for are ( holiday haha ) you quessed it, they cudnt do that. if you like this place you live on a dump, or you are homless.
what a waste of time and money. those of you who want a nice holiday dont do it. no matter what the chav's say . im sure it's perfect for them!!

I love this thread :o

"We have just arrived back from a weeks holiday at the XXXX Palace this was our 6th time & our last."

"But the piste de resistance was when they gave myself and wife food poisioning on the last weekend of our stay. " I am crying now.

"When we arrived at Playa XXX all the entertainment was in SCANDINAVIAN!"

"However two plus points the weather was very nice and we met a charming couple from Cardiff."

"If only the Spanish would learn manners and have at least some time for the hoiday makers after all we are the ones keeping the spanish economy alive.
Come on hotel please teach them manners and show some respect for us, or better idea BRITS only hotel NO Spaniards allowed"

I once found a review on there about my home country, the most ignorant and rediculous load of rubbish laced with racism and a western superiority complex.

Will never use that site again.

I know not trip advisor. But when I went to New Zealand a B & B called Rainforest Lodge I stayed in had a home made sign saying basically - don't complain that it is always raining here, we are in the rainforest. The clue is in the name.

and we met a charming couple from Cardiff

Who probably spent most of their holiday desperately trying to avoid you

'This hotel has been sold and therefore we have experienced all these problems. The x manager who lives in Villa next to hotel got broken into and police called. Next night 5 gun shots went off just at back of hotel. We were all asked to move away from pool bar and sit in restaurant with lights out, music off. My 5 year old daughter was terrified, we tried to tell it's fireworks but she new all right.
A few days after 2 men in suites came round taking equipment that was left. Think you might call them the bay lifts!!!'

Right now, this comes from a stream of awful awful revies about the most dreadful hotel, but some of them are just utterly hilarious in their awfulness.

Wot, no booze?

"this hotel is not very good, there is little or no entertainment and the all inclusive package is not all it seems. cocktails are only free from 9pm until 10pm which is strange because All inclusive should last all day and hotel guests are only allowed one type of cocktail a day so they wouldn't be able to drink what they desire. there is also only one type of beer and one type of wine. and limited spirits. the food is also very poor and most is constantly cold. i would not recommed this hotel to people looking for a good time. "

^the above is a review of a hotel in Crete

They put us in a room that was occupied by a couple of homeless people that were having sex when my kids walked in the room. They busted stink bomds and said my dogs did it , but everybody knows that dogs don 't smell like farts my dogs are very well maintained and trained, I
have papers to proof it

My tire was punctured with a knife part of the blade was in the tire when I had it changed . I 'm pretty sure it was someone from housekeeping. Never again will I stay at this place

I have holidayed lots in Islamic countries and I love being lulled awake by the call to prayer over the loudspeakers from the minarets. So long as it's not coming from right next door, but romantically drifting in from a bit of a distance I find it very soothing. But then I don't mind being woken by cockerels either, so perhaps I'm just weird.

@ Portofino:

"piste de resistance"

^ fantastic

I've just found a lovely place in Majorca called Hotel Moron. Who would book that? Why risk it?

This place sounds nice:

When you step off the bus, it is like being mauled by a giant mound of sick. You can taste it as you walk past people queing up for Planet Dance. You expect something at least, a little decent looking at the website, no no no... when you get into the place, the feeling is the same as it would be if you accidentally shot a dog and ended it's life.

These are brilliant - particularly love the one complaining about the penguins. Also have read many reviews complaining about the call to prayer in Muslim countries. Some people really should have their passports confiscated.

"....The rooms are located on various floors but be careful as some rooms are located by the lifts outside the hotel security door, so anyone from the street can gain access to your hotel room door. As I discovered when I returned to the hotel for my second stay and a tramp followed me upstairs to reception, tried to take one of my bags and follow me to my room. The guy on reception did nothing to help me and let the tramp get back in the lift with me..."

[Hong Kong]

Couldn't resist adding these

From Benidorm...

..the food was ok but nothing amazing. great if you love fish or pialla or if your just spanish in general...

Spanish in general??

However, this person has obviously found the Spanish hotel of their dreams...

We have been to this hotel 4 times now and will continue to to return in future!
This hotel caters purely for us Brits!!! You can get a cup of Tetleys tea any time of the day and you can have HP sauce on your meals.There is BBC1 ITV1 sky sports 1 in your room,so if you dont feel like going out,at least you can fetch some drinks and watch a bit of tv comfortably.

Glad to know that someone is enjoying themselves

Nothing to add, but loving your work everyone ...