Thickos on TripAdvisor

[bupcakesandcunting]

I usually check reviews about places on Trip Advisor before booking a holiday. I've been having a snoop round this morning for a holiday and went onto Trip Advisor to read the reviews and honestly, some of them look like they've been written by a bear mashing his paws into the keyboard and hitting "send"...

AIBU to disregard reviews by people who moan that "nobode understand ENGLISH" "no chips/salad just greek food" "wayter rude" or should I be giving them the same attention as the others?

This thread just made me snort granola out of my noise, so while it was funny it was also rather painful and I'm not sure I will return. Also, many steps were required to reach the summit of the thread.

2 stars.

"just returned from this hotel with a word of warning the food is all turkish no concesions are made for those of us who do not like spice or mushy food my wife ate nothing for a week eccept breakfast cereal that said i agree that this is agood hotel with the nicest staff i have ever met don,t have room 586 its full of ants"

Porto - marvellous.

My fave is the Americans who complain that Italy has a hill, is hot in summer and does not have sufficient top loading washing machines. I booked into that particular hotel in Rome pronto.

Always ignore tripadvisor reviews where it is their only review. Always.

Beef nuts, WTF.

on one night a woman called me at 12:30 am and in broken English was attempting to say something to me which half awake first sounded like police and accident or something eventually I managed to make out leslie and call her or something which I know no leslie ... but it took me an hour to get back to sleep

Well it would, wouldn't it?

Beef nuts has me geneuinely perplexed. It's either bovine testicles or actual nuts rolled in oxo. Neither sounds appetising.

Surely his wife could have eaten the ants if she was that hungry?

So much more nutritious than breakfast cereal and she wouldn't even have to leave the room.

?Prostitute Hotel Be Warned‎, Filthy, disgusting, unacceptable?

Translation: she robbed me and I didn't get my anal probing.

"there is no air conditioning at the hotel's lobby ,dinning area,bar there are people sleeping at the lobby area laying threre on the coches with out socks just nasty."

Before going to Four Season in Vegas (Work trip, i could never afford it myself), I checked trip advisor - one american guy whinged that when he came into hotel at 4 am the receptionist wouldn't let him take the flower arrangement to give his gf

Others were complaining about the thread count of the sheets... honestly I've never been in such an amazing place, made me a bit sad I'd never be able to afford to go with dp & ds!

there are very humans and nices recepcionists,particularly Róbert,he is very nice to everyone,and any request quickly perform

Shirl! How could you leave out Robert?

A review from a First Choice Holiday Village:

"The lead from the playstation 3 to the electric sockets was laying across the bed where our 4 year old daughter had to sleep. This was the only way you could plug it in" (umm, so dont plug it in when she is asleep)

"There were flies every day and night in the restraunts" (oh the horror, flies in a hot country shock)

"It took 2 days for the hotel to replace our tv/dvd player as faulty and did not work at all" (two whole days with out a TV - nightmare!)

"location of hotel a 20 min walk from nearest shops/chemist (20 minutes? Is that too far, really?)

"If you don't have kids - do not go here! I learnt my lesson on that one and will now only ever be going to an adult only place. Kids were running riot EVERYWHERE 24/7" (it's a Holiday Village, of course there are kids, and I thought you had a 4 yr old ?)

"So this is by far the worst hotel EVER! First i had to walk to the front clerk while looking at a discusting hole in the wall. poorest quality their is mold on the walls, holes, scraping paint and wallpaper. after getting my room number, and started walking to my with my two kidsand wife, note that my kids were both 6 at the time. with a suprise at the door, there was a prostitute. a prostitute who called herself dillie? saying she was waiting for her man she called hustler? i was horrified having the thought of my children having to look at a half naked prostitute infront of me. i felt like a falure father. the prostitute wouldent stop fighting for the room eventhough it was ours, until we had to call the police to get her out....HORRIBLE PLACE TO STAY NEVER AGAIN DAMMIT. by the way there wer maggets and ants in my room. Lets just say that if I had to stay at this "hotel" or die................I would rather die."

her man she called hustler

I like "i felt like falure father"

Heh heh

the prostitute wouldent stop fighting for the room

damn that prostitute dillie

I heard your real name is dillie, Hully...

if your a pensioner and can speak german you could tolerate it but the hotel is awful sockets hanging off the wall towel rail also hanging off the patio door didnt lock a crack in tha main door entrance floor tiles cracked and bits missing from them. the food was never hot sometimes even cold glad never went all in as what you had for tea would be following days dinner the staff werent very helpful at all. no entertainment apart from sats dont be fooled by the photos of this hotel they are afout 20 yrs out of date basically avoid this hotel personally i wont be going back to that side of the island

Holiday Watchdog site: Majorca

These are not suites they are rooms to let, the furniture is from ikea most of it, the continental breakfast they write is all wrong with pre-packaged croissant, orange juice - condensed, only the yoghurt was fine, even the coffee was questinthable. The walls of the room were dirty

Really want some of that coffee

This is a piss take, no?

"absolutoly adored the beans there!! they tasted so nice with the ham and spinache!! i recommend trying them averyday!! and i even lost 19 IBS - which is so thrilling i will be returning next year to try the beans again and maybe the spaghetti"

Oh God I have to go to work now and I just want to stay here finding thicko revies off Trip Advisor :(